there is a boy in a bed in a room. tubes are coming out of his arm, one out of his nose, and something is beeping too loud. he looks up at you under half-closed eyelids, and he smiles, and you love him. no fanfare, no celebration — just something taking root in the pit of your stomach and blooming, an unseen flower.

the boy is still in the bed, the beeping is still too loud, but you go and sit next to him and you can’t let go of his hand. he’s looking at you like he knows, like he’s always known — like he’s been loving you this whole time, just waiting for you to catch up.

and in a hospital, in the midst of chaos and disease, a beautiful thing slips quietly into the world. everything is still, and you can’t look away from his eyes.

On the darkest nights you can find the moon
hiding in her right eye. The wolves will cry still
The iron ocean tides will fall and rise
and fall again- against opals and faint oyster pearls.

On most mornings her voice sounds
like water drifting
between the black stones.
Her oak palms, open and raw. Still, her fingertips
touch like the way raindrops drip
onto the smoked, burning ground.

And if you dare to love the way she loves
the trees will grab to the end of your sleeves
until they uproot. The sky painted in lilac
and copper evening clouds, spins until
your feet cannot help but lift
to the burning Aspyn skye.  

On your loneliest nights she will empty
herself, carve a hole in her chest and rock
your abandoned heart gently to sleep
and in the morning when you wake
you will wake with peace,
The moon wrapped around you,
the world spinning,
hearing nothing but the soft,
soothing, sound of water
drifting.

I don't want to hear from you anymore
You're a liar
You're just a creep
Manipulative
Controlling
You never could have loved me
I literally can't stand you
I'm leaving
You'll never hear from me again
You'll never see me again
Goodbye

I'm going to be sick...
Somebody **** me please.

unexpected face to face with history
a speck of your tiny history
wearing a mask unfurled
bumping straight into yourself

My heart hurts, but I'll be alright.
I just won't be alright tonight.
Most of the time my spirit's light,
My silver linings shine so bright.

But sometimes life gets in the way,
And you can't see the light of day;
I know the pain ain't here to stay,
My heart hurts but I'll be okay.

The moon reflected on the water waves
A mountain sliced by clouds
The mist surrounds us everywhere

If only I was different,
Would I finally fit in,
If only I was what you wanted,
Would you love me,
If only I could understand,
Would you regard me as me,
If only I normal,
Could you let me live a normal life,
If only I was clean,
Would you reach out your hand,
If only I could be perfect,
Would you understand that I'm not,
If only I could find who I am,
Would you believe that I found me,
If only I left,
Would you realize what I felt,
If only I lived long enough,
Would you finally realize my potential,
What I could have been.