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955 · Feb 2014
School
Cecelia Feb 2014
Constant frustration and exhaustion occurs when at school
Panic, anxiety, rage, and sorrow
Yet silence is all I project

School is for work, which I am dissatisfied with
I'm a free-spirit, not a soldier of society

Boring, oh so boring!
I have more to believe in life than the standard "school"

School makes me frown, and I constantly look down
But it is the only way out.

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Written about "school" for a school project.
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929 · Mar 2014
Life is a Climb
Cecelia Mar 2014
Looking up from a dark, cold well
I see a peak of light up above in a vast distance.
However, seeing the light makes the distance feel shorter.
The light is close, but not in my reach.

Throughout my life I had been pushed closer and closer to the edge of the well, and finally was pushed to the bottom.
Realization soon overcame me.

I must reach the top.
I must fight my way to get there.
I use all my strength to climb the brickwall and am of great distance from the cold, dark ground below me.
However, the light from above keeps getting further and further away as I climb.
I will never reach the top,
But knowing I'm fighting to get there, is all I need to be satisfied.

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Poem for class.
880 · Feb 2014
Delusional Poem
Cecelia Feb 2014
There are flapjacks singing in the rain
Elephants who are calling my name
I look over at a kangaroo playing a card game
Am I insane?

Flashy colors with flying llamas
A pink panda, is my mama
I see a dolphin who looks like Obama
I need my salsa

In my car, I see dancing spaghetti
It's moving its noodles, like wobbly jelly

You are reading this, yes I can see
But look around, it's not all what it seems
Psychedelic and hallucinations
It's time for tea,
and celebration

Oh hail! The flying nun!
Here comes the cheetah's run
Never look into the sun
Because that is where this has begun.


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I wrote this in 9th grade. It's totally lame but the ryhmes and cooky story is what get people to really admire it. My eyes are not in favor of the sun, and everytime I'm outside when it's shining bright, I tend to hallucinate, so that is the origin of this poem!
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769 · May 2014
Fight for what is Right
Cecelia May 2014
They're going to tell you to not get involved,
they're gonna say it's not your place,
but when you know something is right,
you're going to fight for it with all your might.
No matter what happens,
no matter what they say,
you're going to stick up for what's right
and Fight Fight Fight

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this is more of a quote but i decided to share it

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760 · May 2017
Power is Love
Cecelia May 2017
Power is love.

And the love for Power is strong.

Twisted normality of our fate is strong.

And the love to destroy something with power
is stronger.
5/11/2017

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579 · Nov 2016
Secrets
Cecelia Nov 2016
Secrets The very word triggers a flood of nervous, guilty feelings.
Why?
Do we all hold some sort of deep secret?
We all have them, some have many, while some have just one, but that one
holds more intensity than gravity holding Earth together.

Our own self denial cannot run from this this very word.
We run from lies, love, and pain.
But truth be told,
We cannot even simply run from the word, let alone secrets themselves.

Destroy yourself or heal yourself up, by asking yourself
Why?
Why do I get so anxious about
Secrets?
This was posted on Publisherfree.com
Sign up for Publisher Free (Free signup) and view it here, as well as my profile: http://www.publisherfree.com/scr_download.php?id=49459&type;=scr#epubcfi(/6/2[titlepage]!4/1:0)

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539 · Mar 2014
Untitled (1)
Cecelia Mar 2014
Guess what? I wanna die, not all the time, but every night.
I love to soar through nature's door, but when society kicks in, I don't anymore

No one can see behind one part of me, and it's sad to say,
Part of me wants it that way
But there's another side, that wants to strive,
Out from the hole
its been it's whole life

And if you're too blind to see, I guess it's all on me.
I'm done trying to show
I just thought you ought to know

But now I'm done, I'll just sail away
And just go back to the struggle of each day.

Don't feel bad, it is what it is,
I was just the girl who fell
into it.

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random depressing poem based off of real feelings.
3/17/14 < when it was written.
...Anyone wanna help name it btw?

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519 · Aug 2014
The Mind
Cecelia Aug 2014
The mind is what disrupts and corrupts the soul.

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I may add more , and i feel as if this is more of a quote- but I felt like I should document it here.
481 · May 2014
I'm Tired
Cecelia May 2014
I'm tired of being alone.
I'm tired of being afraid to spread my wings and fly.
I'm tired of fearing regret and
I'm tired of of feeling regret.

I'm tired of being independent.
I'm exhausted in the most severely way possible,
and I'm tired of getting used to pain & neglect.

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481 · Aug 2018
My Crown
Cecelia Aug 2018
You can yank it out of my inner desire
But you’ll never burn my name in the fire

You try to poke at my wishes of sin
But you would never find them within

The beginning can tear me down
But in the end -
I’ll claim my crown

This is my life
April 2018
Cecelia C.
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479 · Dec 2016
I Don't Want to Belong
Cecelia Dec 2016
I don't want to belong to anyone,
not even myself.
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~Possibly unfinished
444 · Oct 2014
It's a pretty sad thing
Cecelia Oct 2014
It's a pretty sad thing
Having to try to contain
High Anxiety

It's a pretty sad thing
Having to deal with someone
Far from who you are
    At times like these

It's a pretty sad thing
When you loose control of
Every emotion known to man
Yet not know the complete cause

Loosing it. Loosing it completely.
But then I ask,
"Have i ever really had it together completely?"

Self control doesn't exist when these outbreaks occur
My mind wanders from every corner
My heart races
My mind spaces

And I have no one to blame
Not even myself.

It's a pretty sad thing

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-cc ; feeling high anxiety rn
426 · Apr 2017
We Can't Go Back
Cecelia Apr 2017
Why can't we go back to the memories that made us blind?
Ignorant, but at least we were happy back then.

Now we know everything and we get sad easily.
Sad over what?
Over the things that were lost from us?
The things that are now lost, are softly remembered as a dream.
A dream that we can never get back again.

It will never come back.
We can't go back.
4/23/2017
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413 · Feb 2019
secrets
Cecelia Feb 2019
the sunset is bleeding into the room
all the secrets from within
will make themselves known
when the winter breeze comes
and takes you away
2/9/2019
Cecelia C.
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407 · Aug 2018
What is Left
Cecelia Aug 2018
Cutting the airspace
Between what's left of it all
Denies my life song
April 24, 2018
Cecelia C.
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(HAIKU)
390 · Jul 2016
She Doesn't Care
Cecelia Jul 2016
She did not care.

Why should she?

What's new to make her feel a sudden wave of emotion?

This is the world she is used to, this is the world she has been shaped to know. And to survive for her own well-being, she can't care.

And she won't care.

She won't care because she cares too much.
But obviously she doesn't care enough to not become what the dystopian world wants her to.
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7/14/2016
Cecelia Sep 2014
A beautiful suicide is what I wish to succeed
Let the Earth take me in as it's own.

It's time to leave my lively throne.

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355 · Jun 2017
Scripted Scene
Cecelia Jun 2017
A scripted scene is what I dream,
and the lines are what I read.

A made up tale is what I fail
to see as make believe.

Everything is forced, and
practiced, and drawn.
What does it feel like,
to sing my own song?

A scripted scene is what I dream,
and the lines are what I read.

Are they blind to what's wrong?
Or is it I who's truly asleep?
6/23/2017

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353 · Jul 2015
You Wouldn't Know..
Cecelia Jul 2015
You think you can make it Disappear
Lock it up into the highest bell tower, throw way the key;
Erase it- the words from your speech
And pretend it never breathes

By keeping it away, the power grows stronger,
meaner,
But you wouldn't know that.

The girl in the backseat
Wants to eternally leave ,
But you wouldn't know that.

Growing sicker and sicker from the disease,
It's here to stay, It'll never leave
I can hardly breathe!!!!

But you wouldn't know that.
And you don't seem to care to even try to know that.



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7-21-15
344 · Jun 2017
Doesn't Make Sense
Cecelia Jun 2017
It's very important when it doesn't make sense.

When it doesn't make sense, everything is bliss.

Everything is fine when it doesn't make sense.

We miss things but it's okay because it doesn't matter.
And it doesn't make sense.
6/19/2017

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Cecelia Apr 2017
Parfois je me sens que je suis morte dans ce monde.

C'est difficile d'expliquer, mais si je dis ça, la société pensera que je suis folle.

Tout le monde a peur de la vérité.
4/4/2017

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326 · Jul 2014
Untitled
Cecelia Jul 2014
Everybody loves her
Because of her face and her voice
But maybe it would all be different
If she actually had a choice.



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321 · Apr 2017
Pain
Cecelia Apr 2017
Pain is like a drug

Once you feel it in your body and mind,
You can't get enough.

It's not good, but to you it's enough.

Enough to feel pleasure and validation
Enough to feel some sort of love
Enough to accept over time.

And over time it begins to morph into
what you call your life.
4/6/2017

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320 · Dec 2018
Wintertime ❄️
Cecelia Dec 2018
The sweet serenity
Of sipping hot cocoa
❄️
The joyous laughter
Coming from the screen
❄️
The silly symphony
Echoing from the instruments
❄️
The jazzy chorus
Humming poetry
❄️
The cold winds blowing
The soft snow snowing
All during Wintertime
December 2, 2018
Cecelia C.
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316 · Aug 2014
Happiness
Cecelia Aug 2014
The sky looks down on me, trying to lift my spirits
What it odes know is that I admire it greatly and that I love it so,
But what it does not know is that no matter what crosses my path, I can
Never truly be happy. Why? I've no idea.
I wish it would go away and leave my presence, but then would my eyes
No longer see poetic wisdom within the standardized society?
I would no longer see or feel the realsm of ones true emotional state.
Why be blinded by a lie? Beautiful, yes- but a lie it truly is.
I'd rather know and accept the tragic truth.
Being overall happy is a goal in which is not in reach and achievable.

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Poem I wrote when I was deeply depressed :P
312 · Jul 2018
A l o n e
Cecelia Jul 2018
For once I'd like to walk down a glowing,
Stranded street and not be alone

For once I'd like to see more than what
Is in front of me

I watch people move fast,
Dream big,
And walk.

There I am in the back,
Down and blue,
I don't ever talk ...

But no one has said anything to me
That would allow me to

I have a lot to say, just no one to say it to
No one cares enough

They aren't fascinated enough
Therefore I'm not good enough

Go ahead, ignore me and all my glory
August 23, 2014
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311 · May 2016
Conflict
Cecelia May 2016
There lives a world

Where nights are calm as war

And we have yet to explore

Beyond the biased box.


A violent storm breaking in

And running their home,

Taking everything that,

Even the children own.


Installing fear that none can hear

With their backs to the door,

Discerning false information with only an ear.

No eyes.


Will it ever end? When, why?

Because doves don't exist on either side.
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written in 2016 for a school project. it represents the current war conflict with Israel and Palestine.
308 · Dec 2018
Swirling Gratitude
Cecelia Dec 2018
Beautifully swirling
With gratitude
Looking around at all
The warmth from the heart
Has brung

To the table
To under the tree
To the clothes we wear in unison

Looking at all the glistening lights
They shine so bright
So festive and cheery

Family lifting up spirits
When the friends knock them down
True ones there for you
Will show you through actions
By sharing more than material objects

Words and actions
Swirl me into gratitude
Merry Christmas!

December 25, 2018
by Cecelia C.
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306 · Jun 2017
In My Dreams
Cecelia Jun 2017
I'm loved in my dreams.
I'm noticed in my dreams.

Even if they don't like me,
they appreciate me.

There is hope in my dreams.

I can see all yet know nothing,
in my dreams.

Even in my nightmares.
But I don't have any "nightmares" because,
to get what I need is of my dreams.

If I could I would escape
to my dreams.

But, like they all know and say,
a dream is just a "dream".
June 14 2017

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304 · Jan 2019
Young Still
Cecelia Jan 2019
Another spark
Ignites within your soul
Shining bright
Brighter than the stars
You once knew

You are growing
To the point of no return
Though you make it
A journey still

Knowledge, excitement
Wisdom, humor
Have not aged
And will not
For several years to come

Happy Birthday
to someone (P)
1/1/2019
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301 · Apr 2018
Piece of Pieces
Cecelia Apr 2018
What a beautiful mess you have created

Was it from your tainted truth-holding mind?

Oh how glorious and glamorous you'll become
Look at all that is becoming accomplished...

So much - you hardly see the problem
It's creating much more than the piece of pieces.
2017-2018
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300 · Jun 2018
Nacht
Cecelia Jun 2018
Looking off into the city,
My eyes drowning in the lights

Meaningful ballads in the background
Lonely, deep, scarred starry eyes
Searching for something in the mist

Taking everything I see, very seriously
Looking up, the moon is the only thing that smiles at me
"the moon is the only thing that smiles at me"

April 22, 2018
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296 · Sep 2017
I shall not fall
Cecelia Sep 2017
All you can do is wish that you can harm me in any way
But the truth remains that I will not die.

The only way my spirits will rush low from being high
Is by my own free will, my own design

And I shall not fall so easily ...

-

My regime of wonder stands tall,
If you want to see it fall,
You must bring more of a challenge
Even then, I will push ten times harder
Than you can ever imagine.

-

All you can do is wish that you can harm me in any way
But the truth remains that I will not die.

The only way my spirits will rush low from being high
Is by my own free will, my own design

And I shall not fall so easily
9-18-17
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293 · Jul 2018
Grown
Cecelia Jul 2018
Looking back at all my sadness
Looking back at all my dread
I realize that I have grown

Looking back at all the judgements
Looking back at all the hate
I realize that I have grown

Looking back at all the blame
Thinking life is all the same
I realize I have grown

I have grown to learn happiness
I have grown to part from dread
I have learned what kindness is
and I have learned how toxic hate is

I have learned that blame is not the answer
And I have learned that life is all but bad
I have learned and I have grown
and I will continue to do so

It's not impossible
7/26/2018
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288 · May 2017
{Thought}
Cecelia May 2017
We breathe not with our lungs. But with the wires.

We feel not with our minds, but with the wires.

We love not with our hearts, but with our idols and false illusions, created by the network.

We are in a machine. Welcome to your life.

Everything's fine.
5/11/2017

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281 · Oct 2017
future
Cecelia Oct 2017
the future that I had feared dearly in the past is now here
and no one around seems to see it

feelings of connections to the past are more prominent that how I could ever feel here in this moment
10/20/17

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277 · May 2014
The End
Cecelia May 2014
I never thought I would be one to live through the end.
I thought by the time my eyes were open, it wouldn't come for years,
after my eyes had been long closed.
But in reality, in which i'm living, the end is here,
and I am witnessing it's tainted glory.

Now when I think back, I realize I had been sailing
not only through my years,
but of the years leading up to the complete end.

The loss of time. The loss of the past.

We aren't supposed to not change things, but we don't change what we're supposed to, and we change the things we're not.

  I am witnessing the biggest natural disaster amongst humanity.
Why me? Why now? I had not prepared. Now I'm stuck at a
crossroad because of my lack of preparation.

Sometimes I'd like to die, but i cannot leave this tragic world behind.
I must fight. Not only for myself,
but for what little life is left for this world.

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272 · May 2018
Forward Flash
Cecelia May 2018
Dreaming of all the great times
Watching rain fall, fall, fall

Wanting it all, reaching out
Watching the clouds seemingly shapeshift

Moving forward in such a manner
Faster than train, higher than a plane

Until

Suddenly the lights come flashing
So quick, breathing is not an option

Was it all for nothing?
Was it for an undetermined legacy?

The lights come flashing
Flashing forever
May 12th 2018
by Cecelia C.
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270 · Oct 2017
Alright
Cecelia Oct 2017
With all the tunes and words combined,
Everything will be alright.

Through the years, and over time,
It all turned out to be alright.

The trees will sway, and the wind will blow
But all the people know
That these words tonight
Mean everything will be alright.
October 24 2017

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268 · Jun 2017
The Reality
Cecelia Jun 2017
You can bury people and you can bury treasure
But you'll never be able to bury the truth

Each time you try, it becomes harder to hide
And quicker to realize.

Life is game and without the mind to find
All the things in time, will turn into a lie.
4/6/17

posted 6/12/17

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260 · Apr 2016
What do I feel?
Cecelia Apr 2016
What do I feel?

Sometimes I feel like a song
Sometimes a beautiful song, other times an overwhelming wreck of a song

Sometimes I feel superiority to others
Sometimes I feel lower than dirt

Sometimes I'm mellow and monotonous
Sometimes I'm hyper and anxious and paranoid

Sometimes I'm devious, callous, and shallow
Other times I'm sensitive, over dramatic, and emotional

Sometimes I feel none of these, sometimes all.
So when the question is asked, "How do you feel?"

All I can say is:
Nothing. Or . Everything.

It seems fictitious, but it is indeed real.
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2016
260 · May 2017
Keep
Cecelia May 2017
Keep sharing.
Keep sharing it all to the world.
Keep sharing what you don't care.

Keep preaching what you don't know
To people who don't care.

Keep pretending you feel, just to fit in.
Keep pretending everything's OK,
Everyone else does it.

Keep believing what you don't see.
5/10/2017
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258 · Apr 2016
Pondering
Cecelia Apr 2016
Entering my own daydream
Where birds fly with the wind
  When I can be free
And where time has no end

  Sitting with myself with wonder
About the cruel, dull world out there
  Wishing someone will bring thunder
To the quiet planet, the most rare

  Hello, is there anyone like me?
Who sees the world now
  And how the world should be?
If only the one's I want, knew how

  Lost in thought it may seem
But for now, my reality is not a daydream



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4/29/16
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OriginalPoem De Moi
258 · Aug 2018
Chance
Cecelia Aug 2018
Go to the place where your dreams lie
Walk upon the steps that will set you free

Others will laugh if you fall
They will ridicule you
AS if they are something greater than human

They are guided by too much sense
And fear

But you can allow yourself
to be persuaded by sheer
Curiosity
8/27/2018
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253 · Apr 2018
Discouraged Disappointment
Cecelia Apr 2018
Humans have eternal curiosity
Which leads them to disappointment
and somber sin

Knowledge sharpens the sword of melancholy
While happiness downs in a sea of
disappointment

Can't you see?

When I allow myself to feel
All I feel are these pessimistic
discouragements
April 15 2018
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249 · May 2017
disastrous dream come true
Cecelia May 2017
How could you say such thing?

Have you forgotten what you experienced?

Deny it all you want now.
But it will catch up to you one day.

And that day will be a disastrous dream come true.

Just wait.
5/12/2017

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248 · Apr 2018
think ≠ want
Cecelia Apr 2018
Do I think?
Or do I want?
April 15 2018
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247 · Jan 2018
What We Become
Cecelia Jan 2018
Dread lives longer
than happiness will thrive.
It keeps us going, it keeps us alive.

To wish and to dream,
of a Hollywood theme,
will soon be disrupted by a reality scene.

Putting our desires to ink then to breath,
is it really worth it, when it comes to death?

Is all we see really only a dream?
Is all that we want, just a perfect song?

Is all that we succumb, transform to what we become?
written June 2017
Published January 2018

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243 · Sep 2018
a journey
Cecelia Sep 2018
Barely a person
A person with no identity

Identity of a white room
Room is full
Full of bottled up energy

Energy to see something
Something we’d become

Become infinite
Infinite of attached identity

Identity of one
One
One leaves
Leaves and never comes back

Back to the start
Start of having no identity

Identity of a white room
Room is full
Full of pain.
September 17, 2018
Cecelia C.
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242 · Apr 2017
Insane
Cecelia Apr 2017
I think I'm insane, but isn't everyone?

If you're not insane, that what value do you have?

It's utter torture dealing with insanity,
But from afar it's quite lovely and cinematic

It's all cool and aesthetic,
Until you're the victim

Struggling like a confused lab rat,
Don't worry you'll adapt to the pain and confusion

But smile for others, you're their show.
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4/6/2017
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