My heart is shattered and splintered
it is bruised and battered
it is lacking the one thing that
any human needs most --
a love so strong and pure
that the stars couldn't match
the light that shined from inside us.

Because starving doesn't hurt as bad
As looking in the mirror.

Because dragging a thin piece of metal
Across my skin, gives the pain a place to live.

Because when it's dark and I'm alone
There's no more voices to say "No."

Because I know it'll be hard for you
To understand- thats why I'll give you a hand.

Because I know how badly you want
To know me. But help me understand this-

Are you ready?

you find yourself alone
slumped in the corner
your knees to your chest
curtains drawn so not even the dawn can ask you how you're doing

all these years, you've swallowed the tears
as if they were bitter pills that would banish your fears
one more beer, one more hour
three hundred minutes thinking in the shower
your heart racing at the thought that this will all be over

you find yourself in bed
not asleep but drifting in the middle
every word you know becomes a riddle
every motion feels like a chore
drowning in an ocean without a shore

you lie there to your side
nothing to keep
but everything to hide

the silence
is deafening
and you never do get used to it
and you find yourself
talking with the dog
because the dog won't leave your side

and you don't dare look in the mirror
because the mirror would only look back
your only solace is but the cold and black
of sleep
you don't want any dreams
you don't want to weep
you just want the darkness
all day
and only the darkness
you keep

You crawled up within my skin
took a taste of my anxiety and welcomed yourself in
wove my fears together and built yourself a home
upon the road of my aching bones
you travel endlessly
and all these indoor bruises that they can not see
I can never stop feeling
Unable to keep you away
I buried my secrets six feet deep
but every day you bring them flowers
everyday you sing to them
and now I am the stranger
wandering hopelessly around your new home
every day I knock,
but no one's ever home

Intrusive thoughts..
Salty Sweet..
Shake the ground,
Beneath my feet.

though miles come between us and
     distance keeps us apart nothing can
           ever change the love inside my heart
                                                                         (t.a)

As far as people go I would say I'm not the best.
My emotions are far too volatile,
and I'm much too fallible.

I often feel that I'm falling to pieces,
I'm too codependent so I wait for people to fix me
(which never happens)

My writing is too emotional,
it has no structure,
its only purpose is to make sense of myself.

I'm a mess,
I'll confess that.

At least I know who I am,
accept myself for all of my flaws,
and take another step forward.