mk - Hello Poetry

mk Nov 2016

winter approaches

my left arm aches
where it broke
into 4 distinct pieces
back in 2004

my shoulder aches
where it was injured
scoring the winning shot
in a match in 2009

my forearm aches
where it suffered
from a hairline fracture
due to a friend's elbow in 2011

winter approaches
all my aches return
still persisting
after all those years

pain is still in my bones.

#broken #pain #hurt #winter #change #ache #season #injury #approach

mk Nov 2016

there's this madness

there's this madness in the world
that i can't place my finger on

it's at the tip of your tongue
when you reach out to lick the icicle
so cold, so raw, so innocent
it's in the curl of your mouth
when you see those clouds rumble
the thunder that shakes you to the core
it's that glitter in your eye
that you have to hide every time
the music is a little too loud
and the drugs are a little too hard
it's dancing in the flames
when your fingertips glaze over the fire
of the rusted old stove that was never good
for anything but defrosting frozen dinners

there's this madness in the world
that i can't place my finger on
i can taste it closer than my mother's breast
and ****** it to my own heart
but i cannot for my life embrace it
without seeing death dance before me
there's this madness with an air of innocence and play
there's this darkness with light shining through
there's this oddity that makes perfect sense
there's something i can't place my finger on
there's something i know
there's something i feel

there
is
something
here-
**now.

- it excites me

#love #fire #strange #crazy #madness #burn #danger #heat

mk Nov 2016

the princess tried to save/**** herself.

and i know i've told you this story a million times but ****, man, it hurts. it hurts knowing that i have no one left, that maybe i am that girl who ends up alone in the end. it hurts knowing i don't really fit in anywhere and that guy at school told me that everyone thinks i'm a stuck up ***** and i guess maybe he's right but it hurts it hurts it really ******* hurts. it's weird because i used to dream about being this broken because it would be good for my poetry but now i'm broken and my poetry's still ****. they're asking me where i wanted to go for university and the answer is hold on, do i even want to go to university can i stand another four years in four walls surrounded by people who don't give a **** about me? i've done it all my life and i'm losing my mind i really don't wanna go down that road anymore, you know? i've been sleeping a lot lately and i wake up when it's dark and that helps i guess the drugs help me sleep but it's getting harder to find the motivation to wake up every single day i push the clock a little further thinking maybe this is it maybe this is when it all ends if i just sleep a little longer. the nightmares. the nightmares, they don't get any better and i wake up in the dark and i wake up all alone and i scream. for you. for help. for God. at some point between praying to you and praying to God i start mixing up names and i pray to you for God and i pray to God for you and i don't really know who i'm praying to anymore, really. maybe it doesn't matter. point is i'm struggling, i'm suffering, and if there's a chance, if there's a little bit of salvation hidden beneath the pebbles of my path: give it to me, please, save me somehow.

-

Nov 2016

Rachel Rae

notes

i am in constant fear of forgetting.
forgetting how i feel,
what i'm thinking,
the directions to your house,
the quadratic formula,
all of it

so i leave myself notes along my way.
inked on my skin,
attached to sticky notes,
sticky-tacked on my wall,
in the paper's margin,
everywhere

but with you,
you're convenient.
tap two buttons at the same time
and our words are embalmed for another day.
just as easy as that.

every once in awhile
i like to refresh myself
by scrolling past each screenshot of us
i began to notice a pattern,
somewhere outside the messaging format

between each picture
were tons more, unrelated.
between us, whatever we are
life has moved on
we've been caught in our little world
while the rest has moved around us
but we have too

i know now
that no matter what happens
i will be okay
because time will move on
and i'll keep taking pictures
of things that aren't us
just like i have been
from the start

written 16 June 2015

mk Oct 2016

we always met in between lovers

we always met in between lovers*

we were 16 and broken hearted
he hurt me and she left you
and somewhere in the pain
we found each other for a moment
we were always a moment
never to be more
but for that moment
we didn't want more

few years later and we found ourselves
someone else
and silence prevailed over our bond
and that was okay;
i never told him about you
you never told her about me
we didn't need to
we were a moment
a moment gone
a moment preserved
and those years, they passed
i lost track
of where you were or who you became

until
we met in between lovers

she couldn't be with you anymore
i couldn't be with him anymore
we came back with new stories
new heartbreaks to share
we came back with memories
that we couldn't bare
to lose
we came back with the need
to not be alone for a while
someone to hear the
silence of our words
and so we spoke
and we spoke
and found comfort that we would never be
we could never be
and that was what made it
so easy
and we spoke
about loss and love
and so i spoke
about how i missed his touch
and so you spoke
about the smell of her hair
and so i spoke
about the color of his eyes
and so we laughed
about that day when this happened
and so we cried
about that day when that happened
and we spoke.
and we spoke.
and we spoke.

we always met in between lovers
we would never be lovers
we didn't need to be.

few years down the line
i wonder if i'll see you again
and it's bittersweet
because meeting you
means i have lost another
and i wonder
why do we always meet
not as friends
but
brokenhearted
between lovers?

this one's for you

#love #broken #pain #loss #friend #meet