You lay strapped to a hospital bed
I want you to come home and smile again
Before the chemicals, before all of this
I'm still sitting by the telephone just to hear you say:
"I'm sorry that you're scared to live another day alone inside of my head
Pills do nothing, just like my friends
My long sleeve shirts are still stuck to my skin"

I will do more
I will do better
I will have a positive mind
A written letter
I will work on me and I won't stop
I'll look back once I am at the top
Once I have reached a goal
I have so many
I will accomplish all of them
I have plenty

I wish that I could get rich off writing poetry and ****
I know that wishing is no better than actually doing it
I understand the ways of the world
If I dare interrupt then it'd cast a spell
One I can undo
Only if I am good to you
Only if I share my pain
In order to do no more than gain

I have mastered this at a very young age
Trust me, darling, I feel no pain
You think you're cooler than me
Well I think you're strange
You think you have life figured out and that yo are going to go far
Well guess what ? I hate you now and I egged your car
Your smile is a very sweet one but when you open it to talk at me I want to delete you out of my life
He was taking photos of me and now you're trying to become his wife
You feel like an ancient queen so here's my advice
Ready for it?
Just die.

It's needed it's not a choice
Speak up let them hear your voice
Show your children that there is a way out
Show them on your own don't let them suddenly find out
Be honest from the start
Be open when it comes to that heart
Remember they need you
Don't forget about the time when you were a kid
Wanting everything and being able to get it
Give it to them
Give your all to them

Slitting her wrists was a cry for help
a very faint whimper
she watched as the blood dropped freely onto her lap
splashing against her tan skin
waiting to feel "okay" again
but this time she didn't
she cut until she felt weak
weaker
weaker
....
gone

Good morning
Have a good day
I don't know if these cats are real or if they're fake
I lost my phone
I must have left it at your place by mistake

You are young you are sweet but you need to learn a few more things
You're still growing up I think and that's fine just don't involve me

Daddy issues is really a thing
I only feel great when I'm the one celebrating

I hardly ever make any sense but that is because I am not trying to
I don't want to be the reason that she has been lied to
I won't be a second choice
I won't be a choice at all
I am not meat or an outfit at the mall
I will not fit you seasonally
I won't stay just because you want to be with me
You aren't needing me
It makes no sense to keep me sticking around if all you are doing is dicking around with ******* and hoes who have nothing

I wish that you could write a beautiful song
I wish that we never ever went wrong
I miss talking to you so sweetly
I miss the way you treated me like a human being
I can't stand the way you treat me like a dog
I'm so upset and my anger is turning into a thick black fog
I would like to leave but there is no where to go
I'd like to stay but there's no love to grow

I was looking for you and I couldn't find you
I kept on looking and I still couldn't find you
I looked elsewhere and I couldn't find you there
I finally gave up and found someone else
Then you turned around and stood there
Letting me know that you've been here all along
I don't get why you kept hiding
We could have stayed together

I'll explain it from his perspective because from mine it seems to be less hectic
He had his days where there were soft blues and greys
He had it made where he could have anything he'd ever wanted
He loved so much it tore him up
He became evil and mean
It's his fault they fought and fought until he was feeling haunted
He turned to drugs and loved them much
Forgetting those who loved him
He turned to drugs because they were the only ones to keep him feeling important
From his perspective I'm cool calm and collected
That made him insane he couldn't believe how calm I was and he became vain

Being away from you was probably the worst feeling in the world
I never realized that the term homesick can also apply to people
I am homesick for you
I miss you
This time there is no meeting up
This time there is nothing
I will not be able to see you again
I will not be able to see you again
This pains me deeply

You're honestly just like me
All hurt and sad so clear to see
But it's only clear to me because you hide it from the world and that is what I do too
Everyone thinks I'm happy but they haven't got a clue
I'm very thankful that I bumped into you
You're honestly better than the rest of them there's something about you that makes me want to stay by you forever
You're so kind and loving and clever
I just love the person that you are today and I really hope that person never fades away
I honestly believe that I am the only one who can understand you I honestly believe that I'm the only one you call, "boo" I honestly trust you with everything inside of me I honestly love you for who you're becoming you're the one I want to give all my loving

I am really upset
It's really complex
All of these memories it's hard to forget
All the times we have spent
All the love put into it
All the scary sad days and the temporary happiness

The feeling just keeps creeping in and I can't seem to clear my head
it's not my fault and it's not yours either and I no longer want to play the blame game. I just want to dance and smell the flowers and I want to sing for hours
without interruption.

I'm tired of my mind being poisoned. I need a cleanse and I want to feel better about myself. I need this now more than ever. The trees aren't as green as they used to be. My smile isn't as bright. My love hides in the dark and my heart feels tight. I can't move sometimes and it's hard to learn without forgetting. It's hard to be happy with these circumstances and I wish I would have passed all my classes.

Maybe in you would've succeeded if you were still in school. Maybe you'd smile longer if the world wasn't so cruel. I feel the weight of the world and I do not want this. I want to be free. Free of pain and sadness. Free of mishaps.

I still have to recover
I still have to wait
I still have to witness you go through that pain
I can easily block you but the pictures keep popping up
I never knew I followed so many people who are hitting that rock
You brought so much hurt and it hurts to blame you but it's the reality no one can change you and if the woman who is meant to be with you was standing there in front of your face, you'd probably turn her down all because of her race and you'd choose the next one because she seems like she is more fun she has no ID no sense of well being she doesn't give a **** about anything but you still care you want to be with her then go
go if you dare

Has it really been five days?
I can always check
I just want to sit and act like I can't

I have a lot to do today
You can either come along or you can just stay
I'd be happy either way
I love the thought of you and I love your kiss
I love the thought of you kissing my lips

There is clearly something about you that I haven't figured out yet
Of course everyone you meet will have their secrets
Everyone does
But yours is different
Yours is dark and I want to figure it out
I'm afraid if I do then we'd be through
We'd be done
I am so convinced that you are the one
You are the one for me
I'm sorry that I faked our family
I'm sorry that I lied to you

You have me at my saddest state
You make me want to start to hate
I love you and it hurts all over I love you and I can never get over this pain you treated this as if it were a game I can't believe you I can't believe that you left me here to suffer all alone with no other I need you and you know that but you have to watch your own back I get it but it's not fair I did everything for you I was always there I held your hand I rubbed your back I fed you and bathed you when you could not I loved you I love you there is nothing much more to say I loved you I love you and you just walked away

What the **** is going on ?
I keep making promises and you're gone
I can't keep my word because I'm so sad inside
I'm so messed up it's hard to hide
It gets harder and harder every day
It stays hard until it goes away
I am still here for you
I wish that you were here too

His smile is so fake and I think that it's okay because nobody notices anyway
But I do and I wish that I can fix I wish that I could help but honestly I am more worried about myself because I am important but so is he he is important he is worried about his family and I'm stuck here in the heat standing and laughing and wondering why I let myself slip away and there is nothing I can do in this case there is nothing I can say to change the way that things are going I am alone but I am soaring in the minds of the lonley because I am there too it may not seem like it but I am and it's not okay to smile away and neglect the pain

We often panic alone and in silence
Never do we try and quit the violence
We dress up and that is not enough to hide it
Everyone is fooled because they can't see inside us

There is no feeling
There is no remorse
There is nothing that I have left to give to you
There is nothing I can say
I only have me

I felt protected next to you
I felt like you understood
I felt like you were always there to help
When no one else would
I can not believe that you are gone
It hurts today
Tomorrow
Yesterday

It isn't you it isn't me it's the both of us
We had our times we shared our tea we laughed and we cursed
Today's for you
Today's for me
I love you dearly

It would be nice but that's not our love
It'd be nice if he didn't push and shove
It would be cool if I could get that degree
It'd be strange to have more company
It'd be great if I could feel more free
It would be great if I didn't feel a thing

you couldn't walk with me but I can see that you walk with her
I hope that she can teach you something I hope that you can learn
How to treat a woman and how not to burn
the people who loved you before
the people who have given more
than what they give themselves and what they give their families
I hope she gives you the strength to do better you'd think
that you would know by now but it is over
there are times where i think you are changed but it is over

I want to keep writing because I do not want to lose this
Every now and then I feel it slipping
I can't control the way things go
I can control my decisions
I can control what mood I am in
Forever I will be at peace
No longer aggrumentative

Nice is the icing on the cake after it's been baked
Nice is water streaming down the rocks and the ground
Nice is the breeze that plucks autumn leaves
Nice is perfectly combed hair and lace underwear
Nice is red nice is green
Nice is not me
I am kind
With a strong powerful mind
I am kind
Nice and smart combined

We shouldn't be upset with the ones who hurt us because after they hurt us they move on to the next victim
You will still be hurting after they have moved on
Forgive
Because most likely they will forget
They may not even know that they hurt you so you should learn to communicate it

Not everyone is going to understand you but there will be a select few
Some who will not say anything unless you are at risk
Some who will smirk
Some who will hiss
When you learn to love yourself, new beginnings arise
When you learn to love yourself, people will see it in your eyes

I'm so glad
That I can finally be happy with who I am
I'm so glad
I have the strength to let go of what I once had

Let's not forget the way I went homeless
The way I starved day in and day out
How I feared that I wasn't making enough milk for my growing boy
Let us remember the way the cars honked as I walked by with my stroller
The way heads turned to judge and not to help
Let us all know that this was hell
Let us never go back to feeling that low again
Let it never happen
Let it never happen
Let it never happen

Let's be serious let's love each other right
Let's make beautiful love like we did the other night
Let's hold each other and dance like crazy
Let's wear nothing and be all lazy
This feeling I get is feeling from hell
But it honestly feels like we're doing each other well
I love you and you love me
Why is it so hard for us to see ?

Letters to the moon
She won't send them back
Letters to the moon

I love your profile
I love your hands
I love the kisses you give me in advance
I love your voice
Your fingers
Your hair
I love how persistent you are
I love that you're here

It feels like I won't be able to love again
I don't know if I am just bored at the thought of it
The touching does not excite me
I am bitter at the thought
The affection and smiles seem synthetic
Because they always have been before
Where do we go to find love again
The answer is that no one knows

I would hug you my friend
but my clothes are tattered
my hair's a mess
I don't smell very pleasant either
I want to tell you it's okay
but I'm nothing
I'm under you
I'm living in poverty
you have plans to go to college
I don't have enough money to get me through the week
my friend you mean so much to me
I wish I meant something to you

Get inspired by the music
Get inspired and then lose it
Go crazy
Yeah baby
January weather is finally over
It's getting hot
It's now or never
Make a move

If I keep dishing out poems then maybe some day you will know them
Maybe I will be able to feel free
Maybe one day I will be able to be me
Maybe I will have all of the things I need and I will not have anything stopping me
Practicing for the future making sure I get what I need
Making sure that I will feed me

If I had a chance to sing or to dance I would choose neither because you aren't in my hands

If I had to choose to love or to lose I'd love with all my might if it meant that I could find you

If I had to leave the US and live alone, I'd do that in a heart beat as long as you'll stay my home

Maybe men aren't for me
Looking back they have always gotten in the way of me being my raw true self
They have gotten in the way of making my dreams come true
They got in the way of my hard work
Of my education
Of my family
My friends
Me
And I let them

Hey Moses
I didn’t really know you
After we all got separated from each other, we all changed drastically
It is not your fault
I wish you had someone
We all had at least someone
I’m sorry for the way your life went
I’m sorry we couldn’t be there for you
You did the best you could
And I’m proud of you because you tried for so long!
You could have called me any time I would have answered
We were always there for you, brother
If you knew me, you’d know you can call even if you were angry with me
I would have answered
You are welcomed in my life
You are welcome here
I wish I could have known you
But the old you, the baby you was the only you I knew
We grew up and let the world take us and now there only lies a few
Moses, what are we going to do?

I sadly found myself starting to doubt God again
And just as I said I had enough, His angels swarmed in
With the warmest hugs and the sweetest kisses
God showed me the light with song and dance
With long lost friends
How He shows up is never known until it's done
God is amazing and is asking you to HOLD on
Never lose sight or hope
He is with you and He needs you to know
All the trees and the birds have a reason
Yes they all change with the season
And so will you
So there is no need to be so blue
You are so precious because you were made in His sight
And you'll never come across someone He is not willing to fight for
He is our God, He is our saviour

Up in the morning
Feeling a bit *****
You're fast asleep there
I'm lying in my underwear
Lace chonies but not a thong
I started to play our favorite song
Then I stopped to feel your ****
It's not standing up
I really feel as if I have bad luck
With him or maybe it's just me
I'll please myself and get lost in the galaxy

I wish that we could just vibe
I wish that you would turn off this tv
I can't stand its unstable light
I wish that I could renew my mind
And find someone who is more like my kind

I always seem to hate the things I love at some point
I don't get it
I wish you were here with me
No kidding
I ended up hating you
But you didn't
I saw you changing and it hurt me I was depressed
And you deserted me
You left me all cold and worried
You never loved me you were just *****