there is no simple way to say
I wish I could make you as happy
as you make me
but it doesn't seem to be working
all my efforts
to break down that beautiful brick wall
have gone unnoticed
the wall never changes
nothing can get worse
but
nothing
will
get
better

SELFISH!
SELFISH!
SELFISH!

My love,
what is your schedule like tomorrow?
do you have time to say "i love you"?
do you have time to get my birthday presents?
to remember it's our anniversary?

My love,
is it too much trouble
to step away from the television?
I know you love your re-runs,
but I can be entertaining too

My love,
did you forget?
when you thought I was beautiful?
when you appreciated me?
when you wanted to make me smile?

My love,
wouldn't you agree?
that no one has ever given you as much as me?
that my happiness is just as important as yours?
that I at least deserve your honesty?

My love,
I'm sure you're right
facebook, sportscenter, warcraft, television
they deserve your time and attention
after all, I am only comfortable and convenient

My love,
Don't worry
I understand
we all need a warm body
to use when we need a hand.

I am not alone because I
Can't make friends

I am alone because alone is safe

No one can tear the
Tender flesh of my heart
If no one is near enough
To find it

You once told me you liked the way the city
breathes in beats of cold concrete
And since then I've found there's something fragile about our motley body heat
Cold breath and fur coats deep in the forest with the roaches
Burnt earth from the other kids' fires
Comfortable anxiety through wet window panes in the morning and wet hair in the evening
Both of us have fingernails nawed through to the bone
And lips scaled scarred but we still call them home
Hey, we're diamonds down to our human hilt
And we laugh when we realize our teeth are sharper 'cause of it
Pop your joints and join me in the tent we put up half heartedly
With the bags stacked up in the corner like mock artistry
Because we enjoy the grass more than we enjoy the stars -
Comets and planets only appeal to me when all of them are ours
Swirling in the eyes like a mark of what makes me yours
Or painted on your hands in kids acrylic when I'm tired and bored
Blue seeping into your freckles
Like starry night for sorry lovers.