In the moments and in the flashes
It is swept over
A feeling to remember

it burdens the soul
like a distant memory
the ground becomes raw
to be part of earth is destiny of all

But to see the beloved depart
The last few moments of agony
Etched into the corner of the mind
Always there, like a company

There was no notice but many signs
If one cares to notice
Never at the time, but in retrospect
Every strand has no result of success
Even if we didn't leave an attempt less

Its just how the control leaves us
and we feel the sinking helplessness

A photograph, a frozen stare
Reveals a world forever changed there.

I'm going to write this.
I say that to myself, and
to you, the reader.
Every time I sit down to
work on poetry lately,
I'm overcome by lethargy.
I look at the whiteness
and go blank.
I thumb through notes,
nothing.

The thought of
lying down for
a nap rides by on
a tri-cycle in
my mind.
I hated naps as a
child, they interfered
with my plans to
conquer the world.
The coolness of the
sheets subdued me.

Instead of admitting
complete defeat,
I say to myself,
Maybe, I will wake
up refreshed and
inspired.
Perhaps, the muse will
visit in my slumber.

I retire to the bed,
Mojo, one of my cats,
Join me at the
foot.
She is soon
dreaming of catching
the elusive moth that
has been bothering
her for days.
And I will dream of
catching words like
butterflies with a big net.

What I’ve Learned

Today, the mind meld is
spewing the kava of
my thoughts over
this place where I live.

Metaphorically.

I”veI learned

That I am egotistical.
That my vocabulary
   is DIFFICULT.

The years of myself.
The coffee, and the
   conversation,
   reading.

The dialectics, like coffee
and cigarettes, the years
over writing, revisions.
Books, sometimes 2 a day.
The Great Gatsby in an
afternoon

I Was not unusual.

There are more things
in Heaven and Earth
Horatio...

But I digress.

It was such an exquisite marriage
The bride was lovely
The groom on his horse
And rain that fell as a sign of good luck.
The guests all arrived in their festive array
And it went as smoothly as carefully planned.
But the wedding cake - Oh my Heavens the cake !
A cake with no rival in the annals of time.
A cake that was baked by a host of proud bakers.
It had so many layers and so many flavors,
But way too much icing in billowing excess
With overgrown meadows of fondant flowers.
There was extravagant scrollwork around the edges
And even surprises baked coyly inside.
But it took way too long to light the tall candle
That finally decorated the top tier.
It was served up in dozens of little small wedges
To the multitudes of the invited guests
Who never saw the whole cake as presented
But only the dainty slice that they were served.
The party went on far into the night
And everyone had a fantastical time.
It must be agreed, twas a world class reception
Except for that cake - that too fabulous cake
ljm

Marvelous looks the way
same route though everyday
amid leaves' rustles
and street hustles
walking jogging running
merrily with the nimble steps
skimming on winds
in an imaginary land
soft little fingers
slipping in and out
of the age worn hand.

Ten minutes to ten minutes fro
changes the landscape though
stiff barren dull sad heavy.

The trudge back
along the insipid land
with no hands to hold.

The landscape holds nothing..
it's all in the mind.