Flames*
The embers of love grow into flames

After that marriage and baby names

I've stumbled upon danger
exciting yet detestable
I can't help but breathe anger

unable to indulge or enjoy
like the day after Christmas
losing your favorite toy

girls are jealous
brave are boys
love I've lost

*time destroyed

A wise soul told me,
We do too much for others,
-not enough for us.

When I sit down
At the table
I get excited
To read your label

Peeling back
Your foil cover
A small square of joy
I discover

Strawberry or grape
Jelly or jam
I don't really
Give a ****

I use a few
On my toast
That's the way
I like it most

I think I'm hooked
Don't try and knock it
I put a couple
In my pocket

When no one is looking
Into my pocket I reach
Slowly I pull one out
Man I hope it's peach

Always thinking about it
That sticky substance I crave
Won't someone help me
I'm becoming it's slave

In the fall
It's homemade preserve
On a Ritz *******
I like to serve

I can't stop
No matter how I try
I'll be a slave to the jelly
Till the day I die

love and laughter we enjoy now
this will end, I'm sure how.

bodies we shared
bed defiled.

the game wasn't fair
too many fouls.

when it's over I'll die inside
but flash a smile.

then I'll apologize
and take a bow.

Sweeter than the song of a nightingale 
Gentler than the whisper of a spring wind
Quieter than the murmur of  summer  grass 
Softer than the symphony of hyacinths 

Hypnotic like the splash of blue seas
Tinkling like a stream that flows 
Mesmerizing like the cadence of rain 
Enchanting like the hush  of snow 

Like the faint breath of a scarlet dawn 
The rustle of clouds on a turquoise high 
A duet of  night and an ivory moon
A Capella of  stars in the sky

A hymn, a chant, a choir of angels 
Singing  on a rainbow of time 
Celestial is the serenade of love  
A tune and a note divine.

My battery was at
94%.

Today it's at
7%.

I used the majority of it
To talk to you about your day,
And listen to your laugh.

I'm waiting on a cord
And maybe a text.
I don't mind waiting,
It's not the worst thing to have happen.

I kind of miss you.
And by kind of I mean really.

This is strange for me
I don't like getting attached.
I don't mind it so much with you.

I was once told
"We need never be hopeless."

And it is true. Things get better.

I was also once told
"Please be strong, please be brave."
I thought it was some type of warning,
That things would get worse.

I have never been happier
To be wrong.

Thank goodness
For Bluebirds.

Its been months since pen ad paper visited
I guess we have all been busy. Caught up.
Consumed by the world around us,
To and fro trying to prove my worth to
those who still leave me anyway.

I drown from liquid to liquid
and yet I never find oceans where my ancestors drowned in
I could never find the voice that has been calling me .
begging for me to join life on the Otherside of the veil

Getting out of bed seems to be a mission
chasing daydreams of finding love and acceptance
I guess I am now back to the only One that will forever accept me
Pen and paper . silent yet loud. accepting yet sometimes so harsh with
pounding rejection because most times I can't even disvirgin paper
so i remain there .. clueless on what steps to take.
I think that's why I am still searching for my worth in random places.
Reasons why people I used to care about became random faces