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Elena Feb 2019
You
I miss you every second I’m away from you
My heart can’t help but fill up with envy
For the people who get to rejoice in your presence
Every second of every day
Passerbyers who get a second glance
Of your beautiful golden locks twirling around with every step you take

I start to envy inanimate objects
That serve your every need
Napkins that wipe your bottom lip from the stickiness of lipstick
Mirrors that reflect every one of your perfect stances
The water that hydrates and gives you life

I obsess over you maybe too much
Maybe I just have too much time to think
But even in my busiest moments
Your image replays in my mind again and again
You’re a flash flood that takes ownership of everything it touches
for my gf
Elena Feb 2019
although i left, i think my cup is still half full and not half empty
half full because you complete me
full because i’ll see you again
not empty because i’m glad i got to experience you
although i miss your full naked body on mine and the empty plastic cups on your bedside rack
i visited my gf of 3 years for the first time january 3rd to the 17th. coming back to reality was really hard but it inspired me to write a few poems might share the rest
Elena Feb 2019
Sometimes I sit down and think, “Is this all there is to life?”
Compartmentalize my feelings of sadness, joy, and excitement into boxes
Some of which stack higher than others and tumble down into subcategories
Times I was sad because of my period, because of school, because of ----

Other times I stand up and I don’t think, “I am completely satisfied with life.”
Because I am not
I look at cracked paint on walls and study the paths the minuscule crevices decided to take
So easily permanent and there

My head has established a tyranny of overthinking and anxiety that boxes with itself
Left, right, no left, up, maybe down, sideways, maybe
Too much to think and my brain can’t seem to understand there is still time to think
No decision has to be made about anything ever just yet not yet maybe

I understand time casts an infinite shadow
It forever runs out even though it’s nowhere near the finish line
It’s always running out
Always leaving me breathless
idk i wrote this cause im feeling anxious also procrastinating on my english homework

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