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Kushal Oct 2018
I find myself fearing my computer screen of late.
What I write there scares me,
It’s all too real.

It lacks the rhyme of what I’ve wrote on my phone,
And digs deeper into my soul,
Forcing me to feel.
It is raw.
Untapped in recent days,
Something of which I stay clear of.
Why would I call upon it?
Life got better, could I not just leave that darkness be?
But then it got bad again, life that is.
It got darker...
The smiles from the screen of my phone couldn’t compensate for that.
I felt the words fading as I tried to place my thoughts on a 5-inch screen.
There was no magic in this.
I knew what I wanted to show,
But I couldn’t do it there.

It doesn’t really make much sense,
Words are words...right?
All I know is that in front of this screen,
This laptop screen,
I’m more in tune,
More in sync.
It hurts so much more,
But I ******* love it.
Kushal Oct 2018
In my spare time I look for quotes,
Words truly worthy of note.
Love is where i land,
Looking for thoughts with an outreaching hand
To tell me I'm not alone.

I think hard and fall deep
As i stare at these words,
Envisioning what they speak.

"I'll tell you what love is," they say.
I agree in a way.
But it always leaves me running through a Labyrinth in my mind,
Searching for the love that I wish to find.

What do I want that's worthy of note,
That someone will someday see,
And feel the emotion in what I've wrote?

"Love is stupid. It's illogical. It's broken. Yet somehow it's the most fulfilling feeling there is. Love is when a smile is enough, and you'd do anything for it."
Kushal Oct 2018
I'd send you morning texts,
Using a cute yet slightly mean nickname for you.
I'll ask what you're doing today,
You'll saying," Nothing"
So I'll ask if you wanted to do nothing with me.

We'd go to university.
I'd skip some classes if it meant I could see you.
We'd go sit somewhere on the grass beneath the shade.
None of that romantic *******,
Just enjoying each other's company.

On weekends we'd go shopping together.
You'd pester me every time I lifted a sweet,
Sometimes I wouldn't listen,
Other times I'd sigh, "Fine".
We'd get some fast food before heading home,
Standing in front of menus looking for the best deal.

But sometimes I'd take you out.
We'd go somewhere with a dress code,
Where the waiters wore suits and a candle sat on each table.
I'd sit in front of you, mesmerized.
And as I do everyday, I'd say you look beautiful.
You'd smile and blush and it would warm my heart.

Night would come,
We'd sit beside each other if we had the time.
Talking absolute ******* and laughing over the stupidest things.
Sometimes you'd fall asleep in my arms over a movie,
I loved those times.
Sometimes you'd say you have to leave,
And even then we'd sit texting till one of us fell asleep.
But oh how I dreaded the moments I had to see you leave,
Though it made me cherish the moments when you'd approach me.
Kushal Oct 2018
(Anthem -noun
A rousing or uplifting song identified with a particular group, body, or cause.)

Sing it loud, sing it proud,
Oh hearts that march lonely through the crowd.
Let speakers blare,
Blow love through the air
And show the world to love.

Us broken hearted fools,
Who've lost love or have not a clue.
We march on through pain with our song,
With the hope of love that keeps us strong.

Us romantics,
No matter how broken and bruised,
The thought of finding love will pull us through.
And we look to the future,
Knowing it'll be worth the wait,
If we find someone to hold,
Till the end of our days.
Kushal Oct 2018
Pain like no other,
Visualized from the droplets that slide down a cheek.
Like the clearest of blood dripping from the eye,
But bleeding from the heart.

More than just the liquid pours out.
Shirts stained with head pressed to chest,
And words seep through lips wrinkled,
As sadness takes over and deprives of rest.

Sticks and stones,
I'd rather have broken bones.
For these eyes bleed worse
Than any bruise could ever be.
Kushal Oct 2018
Walking in the heat,
You can't see my heart as I walk down this street.

I look so average,
Headphones on
And it seems like I'm gone.

But in my head it's like a colourful dream,
Words come through the speakers
And in my head I scream.
Dancing in my head
Through a world shifting to the melody,
Feeling the rise and the fall
Of my mental remedy.

I'm in a music video,
Pouring my soul into a visual daydream.
Time slows as the song goes mellow,
Or hits maximum velocity through the buildup before the blow.

I'm in my own place,
This magical escape of a headspace.
The best part is that in reality,
None of it leaves a trace.
Kushal Oct 2018
I look back at all the things that I've done,
For a girl that i never won.

All the trinkets that sparkled
Under the moonlit sky.
Accompanied by a silence
As i waited for a reply.

All the smiles i created,
Just to see you elated
For a moment
That lasts forever in mine eyes.

All the poems writ and read
But never read.
The longing for you to understand the words,
Yet at the same time, not .


And after all the sorrows,
After all the pain,
I'm still where I started.
Standing in-front of a girl,
Trying to make her smile.
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