I refuse to be one of those people
that everyone chooses to love once she is dead
Don't wait until I'm lifeless and can no longer hear you
to start giving a **** about me
If I wasn't good enough for you while I was alive
I sure as hell won't be good enough for you when I'm dead
If there is something you need to tell me
do it while I can still hear you
If you want to see me
make plans with me
If you love me
tell me while I am still here to love you back
Do not wait until I am a pile of ashes
to confess everything you ever wanted to say to me

This isn't your regular type of poem or free writing.
This is a cry out.
To all of those who are in need.
In need of a helping hand.

For those who are in need of a simple listener.
A heart to bend with.
A heart to break with.
For those who have longed to find a pure connection.


I am a friend to those seeking a friend.
I am the constant pull and push, between the tides.
I am the searching, forever lingering Feeling of lust on everyones tongue.
I am the monster we all try to hide.


Seeking is to finding as finding is to seeking.
If that makes sense to you at all.
An obsession in your heart that consumes you, fully.
Is something you can share with a friend.


I am Joshua Wayne Haines.
Seeking a friend for the end of the world.'
I trust in you as you trust in me.
Forever, we will live on with chaos.
In our minds, with hope in our hearts.

I am addicted to you.
I am addicted to happiness.
Happiness I find in the taste.
The taste of you.


I am addicted to the sensation of your skin against mine.
The taste of your lips against my lips, constantly linger.
The simplicity of my addiction for this being, is unimaginable.
The simple smell of her perfume, the way she holds herself.


My addiction goes deeper than just physical meanings.
My addiction runs to my soul.
This addiction, which we call love, ether way it's the same way.
Consumes me, It fulfills my deepest desires.


My addiction will be the end of me.
It will suffocate me and drain me, until I am no more.
Sadness and realization go hand in hand, both make you stronger.
My addiction is life, love, happiness, pain, sorrow, and to never leave someone behind, never betray them....

Every single bit of drive
The dream that once propelled me forward
Working vigorously, trying to reach it
Thinking I could reach it
Now seems just that. A dream.
And I feel as though I've let down
Every single person I see
And the motivation is all gone,
Because what am I working for?
Please tell me, what am I working for
If he's right, then what am I doing
Shouldn't I give up
Shouldn't I stop
Shouldn't I just fill in the role
Of the dissappoinment
we all knew would happen

Steam spilling, white froths licking
Marble mantle pieces, stone white
Opaque ghosts swirling conspicuously,
Silently naught with disturbance and gloat
Humble in nature, the steam spills
From the open pours,
Streaming running water
spring, a delightful swing
slight melodies of sulfuric and mountain
flirting lavishly , emitting heat
an early morning bathe,
bright sunshine invades
sleeping shadows tinted cold
a chilling sensation humming
with that of the pool’s lip
--fluttering autumn leaves—
--cascading crystal flakes—
--rustling green trees—
--tickling cool rain—
The surface of the spring’s pool remains
It stirs with the slightest breath
Occupying stark bodies
Gleaming baby red
Washing away, cleansing a new day
As sunlight sparkles on the
Mirror surface

we live in times when words have lost their meaning
they only serve to fill some soundbite gaps between
faces of popstars, politicians, presidential candidates,
maybe some refugees, victims of crimes and natural catastrophes

and more sensational media creations flooding our lives
with unrelenting hype unless you push the button
that brings quiet to your life   and you find time to reconsider
what it might be  exactly you desire to achieve

in the short time we are allotted in this world
you will discover it is not the senseless media blather
but some coherent thoughts turned into words becoming deeds
enacting change leading to bold decisions

think for yourself and don’t let others think for you
then speak your thoughts in words like others cannot do

As the troubles come, the sorrow drifts in,  losing who you are, emotions gone to far, though know there's light in every life, be strong and hold on for eventually ones self love will shine on!

I write poems for no one to read,
and that’s how I know they’re true.
Here’s sadness for no one’s benefit
a determination to continue that
does not ring hollow in these empty halls.
Genuineness is the bedfellow of solitude.