Missing you
It's like trying
to breathe under water
and tonight I'm sleeping
at the bottom of the ocean

I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

I find more comfort in strangers
than my family

He was:
hard to hold
but impossible
to forget.

He could show you forever
In a single glance;
a glimpse into love,
untimely romance.

when I try to understand
the immensity of what I feel;

My heart on the line,
his hand on the reel.

My soul is exhausted,
it whispers for me to rest
But my heart says, “Fight. Don't give in. This is a test.”

My brain says “Do whatever you want.”
and  it wasn't a lie
So I dropped my head, held your hand tight
while I hoped to die

We're almost touching.
we were walking side by side,
you're talking about cabs in your hometown.
I can feel the gravity of your hand, calling my fingers
whispering "it's alright."

We're touching but not quite.
you held my shoulder to protect me from the passing cars.
and for the first time in a long while, I felt so fragile.
In this world where I find it hard even to breathe,
you believed me.

I almost said it.
All I need is one ounce of strength to tell you every single thing that I have ever felt about you.

I want to find home in your collarbones.
Would you be kind enough to let a stranger in?
I want to seep in your being because I'm cold.
The world is harsh and my cracks are aching.

Almost.