I know you

Here I have stood with you
And I will never leave your side
Valued is what you are, you're an inspiration
Even when you feel like you struggle

Little do you know that people still look up to you
Oh don't you know
Vows create a connection
Everyday's remembrance of dedication to something or someone
Don't you want to give vows too?

You must have at least an inch of temptation to love someone else
Otherwise loneliness will be a cold side on your bed
Understand the need for love?

is it crazy?
to think
that if you fall in love with me
it would totally be too early
but we could totally still last forever

Thanks for choosing to join society

On a side note it’s a permanent stay

Where everything is fake
From the flowers
To her lips

So get comfy this is our routine everyday

But not too comfortable
If you do we will tear you apart
Layer after layer
And don’t expect anyone to hear your prayer

Along with that we provide our services
With deconstructive criticism
Upgrade to our premium
Where there are many helpful tips
To learn to love your body
But thats only once you've met our standards
And we see you paper thin

It can be slightly difficult
Living in this new world
With our expertise and precision
It isn’t meant for everyone
But since you've gotten here already
There is no exit out
So this is your new life
Until your very last day
When we finally realize what living is really about

Thanks for choosing to join society
Where its an artificial place to stay
Put on the fake smile you’ve mastered
And have a great day

You are the reason why the chemical formula of love rushes through my body
That presents itself through my cheeks as I blush until I’m extra pink
That causes my muscles to tighten as I smile creating dimples near my mouth

You are the 8 carbon 11 hydrogen 2 nobelium used to create a simple molecule of dopamine
The dopamine that rushes through my brain
Through my veins
As it enters my blood stream
But when I hear that somebody else gives you that feeling
It breaks my heart
You underestimate how important you are to me
And it tears me apart
How a simple wave can make my day
Although you weren’t waving to me it was really the person behind
But that's okay

Your laugh and smile are the serotonin and oxytocin
that joins with the dopamine
collaborating too make a toxic mix we call love
When you take too much of the chemical things change
Words turn into blurs
Sounds turn into waves
Everything is now a haze

To me you seem perfect like a perfectly painted picture next to the perfect summer sun
A perfect combination
To me your the reason why I fall asleep
Eager for the next day to rise
If only you knew that that you are my toxic concoction we call love

it feels weird
knowing i am not with you
knowing that we won’t be together for the rest of our lives like we once planned
nursing homes and having our rooms next to each other is scratched out
how from this point on we depart in a way
you are too busy for me to make plans with
too busy to call me
too busy to text me
and my mind is too busy sometimes too
spiraling thoughts spiral more
and i remember how we won’t be together
that feels weird
losing you in a way
except the only one getting lost is me
because you are perfect
and you can’t get lost
it still feels weird
knowing i won’t be the one you ask for the homework anymore
it feels weird that i don’t want it to be me
it feels weird that i have been wanting to escape these friendships for a while now
i am trying to take my opportunity
but at the same time i don’t want to be rude
i know what this situation feels like
my skin is dry now
from our most recent dry conversation
i could not even force myself to laugh
nothing was funny enough
i am sorry that i dragged you down for so long
that i dulled your shine
that i wasn’t able to provide the same support that everyone else was able to
it feels weird
knowing that we are related now
knowing that our friendship is complicated but still simple
a little too simple
simply complicated
it feels weird now
knowing that i won’t be there for you when it is your big first moments
promposal
first boyfriend
or even homecoming
it feels weird
that i don’t want to mix you up with the new life that i am going to have
that despite me having so much to talk to you about
i didn’t want to tell you anything
my mind no longer felt obligated to force my mouth to spill every little secret and detail
that it was more comforting to say that it was too much and i did not want to talk about it
it felt like torture
but not your presence through a screen
my own presence and my own breathing
it felt weird
i didn’t have the urge to want to have a sleepover with you anymore
suddenly eating breakfast and brushing my teeth next to you wasn’t as appealing
i would have rather stayed alone then done that
you were too nice
you couldn’t understand my feelings that is for sure
have fun at your concert though
i hope you find a cute boyfriend that treats you really well
i hope you forget me i truly do
i’m sorry i dragged you down so much
sorry i was the negative in a magnet and a pregnancy test
sorry i couldn’t be someone like you
i hope you forget me
and it feels weird
knowing that i hope i forget you too