These walls are bleeding down
Can't you hear their hounds
Here they come here they come

I bleed as I write can't you see
My heart its been torn from me
I won't cry just give me a sign
That everything will be fine

Wake up covered in ash every day
Smoke drifts in theres nothing left to say
But hey I got older again never be the same again
Colder how do I feel again?

I'd do anything to put out the fire
But all it does is grow even higher
My hardships have only made me falter
The world as I know it is no longer

No hope nothing will change
Even if I gave my life for it
Even though I burn for it
I'd give everything but it's all the same

And if its all the same then I'll drink till I puke
Party all day and **** my lungs with smoke

So show, no soul
I’m cool, so cool
A tool, a fool
Highschool, cesspool

Like A B C, 1 2 3
Like way he be, wan’ to be

Better than me, than me, than you

No slowen, leave me be

Me, myself, and I
I shot me, myself
Catch myself when I hang me
Me, me, me
By myself

I
Wikihow noose knots
Not a cry for help
How do you cry out

A note loose leaf
With a noose knot

**** out my way, **** out my way
Im in my way, Im in my way

Luck run thin, eat a buck
Shot, blood all over Bathory ****
Blood pumpin, heart open, veins open
Open heart, open artery, deep cut

Surgical precision
Practical decision
Painful incision
Vertical division

I have depression

Dead freaks never had any balance
Authority tried to demand compliance
So we left society and became truant
Forced to speak in ends now we're fluent

Money on my mind, mind on my money
I cant seem to find either bloods turned runny
I might just die just to make the ante
I steal and I lie to fill up our pantry

They know who I am I'll leave it all broken
Leave disrespect in dirt with toads croaken
Lacked it now on the ground chokin
Can't breathe in the arms of an ocean

My dead friends, I'm gonna run without balance
Got the bends underwater and uncompliant
Don't follow trends I've long been truant
Told to speak in ends and now I'm fluent

And whats it to you if I steal, lie, and cheat
Is it immoral to survive on the streets
Judged with morals I can't afford
Standards made by the pious and bored

All these demons fiending for some redemption
But I'm thinking they just want some attention

That won't cut it so I cut it up on the dance floor
Cut it up cut it up snow white runs out the door

Been up a day, no we've been up for days
From suns first ray until stars escape the skies

Feels like its all overrated but its just all overdue who knew
Hearts aerated fillin gaps with the same old but act like its new

Someone asked me for the time so I gave them the time of their lives
Fancy umbrellas witha side of lime lets drink to our many vices

For us there is no boring ending to all this partying
Just a constant tightrope walking and death defying

One dollar to my name and I need a million or more
**** this collar its all the same the boss gets the score
While I act like a ***** for a dollar and stay poor
I welcome death at my door I'm hollow to the core

Hollow to the core longing for nevermore
Empty eyes they've been dry for a year or more
My heart is sore and still life takes more and more
Only option only path my only choice is to end, or...

Struggle to survive walk on and act like I'm really alive
Yeah, like I'm really alive aimless I've missed the time
It's like these rhymes I make they wander listless across the line
Maybe me and my suicidal friends are just a sign of the times

Anti depressants like water and **** like the air we breathe
Loss is always what comes after seeds are planted in earth
Reap the young **** us cause the old have need for wealth
Can't breath buried by bills tossed away if we lose our health

Looking at my till with more cash than I'll ever have
Breaking my will patch it with the stash in the cave
Work till the day I die I know for sure I am a slave
Misery is sold cheap these days its the new wave

Drowning, breaking hearts, while the markets break the chart
I mourn the loss of innocence while I commit evil just to eat
Criminal thief and dealer but I always made that rent
I grow colder my veins icy all the way to the heart

Nowadays I invest in blackrock even as they steal the future
To poor to not play the stocks heal finances like ***** sutures
But its more like I'm locked in stocks while wealth laughs at my fears
If I don't succeed than I can only hope my face will be graced by tears
Only twenty three and I feel the depth of years

Alarms off, barn chicken soundin warns sun risin
Warm in the kitchen, finger lickin greazy livin
Mournin in mornin, four am mind *******
Just in reporter on a camcorder record ya
Was untoward asking opinion on ya lord
Funny looking color like a funyun my answerin
whiny vision velour clothing,  demon spawn
When gone might pawn golf sets off lawns
In the end money tight even lint gone
Opinion bent left plant facin a light dawn
No prawns starving its lent living in a tent
Woes found working paying rent with money lent
Toes cold staying in boots, boldly saying let go
Cow bell ringing meat packaging on the blow
Flow swells bringing dead whales in undertow
Wont tell no snitches no tales how trust grow
Bows n ties oft means lives built on lies, so
Below tries most the honest living and dies
Boo hoo momma cries over a racist, my my
Here lies a body of a sexist marxist, no longer exist
Goodbyes in winds are ******, believed in lists
Why try when points missed, wished but unblessed
Covid coughs bless you, hands rinsed lead laced water
Void laughs in stints empty cans scraped and placed wherever
Devoid of soap stinky citys unclean even when precipitated
Dubois protests violently retchs wholehearted tenths participated
Soy and leeks replacing meat costs a whole check to be sated
Boys an chicks dancing feet lost to most fact is their elated
Whiskey sticky drink at meet an greets an bar posts

I can barely think just puked in the sink
Don't worry I'll get better
Another day on the brink getting new ink
I'm your ******* martyr
So choke me harder

So pathetic to worship a ****** ******
Rather live in the **** and **** than live just
Republicans worship an antichrist

If empathy is a sin I'd rather be the devil
Your all hateful and stupid and not on the level
Science and acceptance built us but you want a hovel

Well well its that time again
Afterwork losing my mind
Afterword nothing to find
Outside the pane is the rain


Watching as I fall behind the curve not doing enough
Shoot dice and put in no effort cause I'm lazy as ****
And its snake eyes again **** just my luck
Now its over and that's rough well tough

Unbelievable its getting worse
Guess that's life running its course
Entropy takes us all back to the source

Evermore and ever less
Nonsense is what I confess

Until there's nothing left

Being alive these days feels like a crime
Punishment in the smog and crushed limes
Drink till it stops come pay your fines
Then work your way back through the line

Get higher get tools get cash
More fire more fuel more ash

Trace threads on your bed
Face the dead in your head

Gold plated saints lead us over the edge
Black tarmac crumbles on the ledge

Dreamers can stay in their comas
Workers can dream of some commas

I was left in the snow I was pulverized
Just how it goes have a friend he'd say
"It is how it is" well now I'm in overdrive
Left by everyone to die I've never felt so alive
Lost out in the tide eyes are blasted out wide
Never go softly in the night always up at first light
Need out of my head because I don't understand whats left
Barely use my bed hes weird thats often whats said
Won't you just leave me like all those voices in my head
So silent now I don't hear them what was it they always said
"worthless, godless,  why aren't you dead"
Now its all silence and I miss them
My one and only friends

Stone age tactics back stage with the tactical
Neck gets cracked late stage its practical
Flak jackets in vogue situation critical
Situation critical situation cyclical

Path to follow its paved in rust beneath is hollow
Many fell below turned to dust that's hard to swallow
It's follow or bust though so where will they go
Head off the pillow rest not a must time is shallow

Leaders after success, not yours not mine just theirs
Others suffer to cater at a dime serve wine without a share
Career servants without time tearing out their hair
Fair is never what comes near the life of a waiter

Family members, team players, sacrificed at the altar
Never allowed to falter the atmosphere grows hotter
Grease and sweat drip off wage workers
Sickness, death, and age as they grow older

Nothing to account for no money
Nothing to amount to no property
Nothing to surmount except poverty
Nothing but a body-count for inequality

Sometimes I look in someone's eyes and see the blue-collar
Someone empty-eyed with flagging pride and sickly pallor

From too many night shifts no sun in his life
Many nights thinking on being a waste of life

Recognized from countless mirrors
A visage that draws ever nearer

Fear in shadows of the mind
Nothing in the eyes to find

Nothing to impart
Not a single spark

Walking ghost
A empty host

This isn't aspiration its ****** desperation
Whole life spent in dehydration an starvation
Bein real I don't even want salvation
Schizophrenic walls are talkin
Tell me I'm overdosing

**** it though atleast I'm feeling something
even if its suicidal atleast its something
Peak its oncoming then a crash landing
Minds changing its shifting
Uplifting but its shifting

I'm wishing on stars written in a few bars
Doing **** going too far endin up on mars
Engine aint working, smokin spittin out tar
Burn up in the atmosphere with no fear
Torn up by g force smackin the planets core

I'm watching myself die every day I just
Watch myself die, most my friends lost
Worry that today could be the last
Hope today might just be my last
Doesn't life move fast

Thought I was gonna be rich thought I was gonna be famous
I was just out of touch right now I'm just depressed
I miss her touch now my rooms a mess
I failed that much is clear if this is all a test
I'm under too much water waves I couldn't crest

Me and my friends will never be rich
Me and my friends doin drugs chasin a wish
**** aint life a ****** *****
Too many friends done switched
Stealin many ends watched me eat ****

****, every year feel like the final year
No ones ever here alone with my fear
Its cool even I don't care got an empty stare
So I guess abandonment was my fare
Tellin myself life just aint fair

All the things I've survived
Demons, beasts, fiends
Skinwalkers whom I complied
Get on with friends

Get on with anyone, anything
Diseased minds tell me lies
Listen as time is festering
Eating away their lives

They claim godhood expect worship
I stand in mock appreciation
They see my smile and see worship
A smirk hiding condemnation

I laugh and smile commiserate with a devil
They think it's with them but it's at them
Slowly they realize I'm not on their level
When for help to me they come

I turn them to their sins and crimes
As I refuse them even the smallest crumbs
I've seen better men beg for dimes
So I lack pity I will not be a crutch

I'm dyin inside listening to dead outside
Husks without things clutching dreams
Always in me do they choose to confide
Noone else will listen noone cares

Even they don't care for what they say
Still they talk and talk trying to be okay
No one will sway to the sound they make
Still I listen just in case that's all it'll take

Hope they shed their horns and fangs
Become men once more through the pain
Can't do more or risk losing skin of mine
So I listen while they fester with the time

Holden a narcissist pride
Eat my heart with rye
Look at a sunny day with a sigh
Always feels like the end is nigh

So you don't want to vaccinate
You doubt the lies on your plate
But what of the truth you hate
Of skin turned greyer than slate

Grandfather, grandmother didn't hear a word
"Covids a sham" into a casket they slammed
Ever faster death does gather its all around
It abounds yet gets erased by radiowaves sound

Adults can't behave, to wants remain a slave
Maskless and unashamed not one is saved
Double down in those tasteless ways
Half a million dead dropped like flies

Still a toast is in order as progress is made
One casket at a time feel the change
Jobs open up and now I'm getting paid
Wonder why everyone is so afraid

Mostly we lose dregs who don't know when to fold
Costly now to lose so many empty heads to a "cold"
On hospital beds thinking shoulda woulda coulda
While the doctor thinks "I ****** told ya"

Breath your last, lungs in tatters, whats the matter
Maybe everyone isn't mad as hatters
Scientist in agreement with doctors
Riddle me that conspiracy theorizers  

Well I'm tired of being sad so happily I say goodbye
Let go and go in peace even if it was all a lie
So just sleep, leave your loved ones behind
Paul said it best "live and let die"

Burn the whole house down
Hand down her blouse and gown
Go down on her without consent
Electrify men for fun if your mike pence
Watch out Bidens got your scent
And trumps stealing your rent

So if you tell me not to worry get bent
I'm busy asking where my freedom went
Why is she in a casket buried in a trench
What the **** is with spikes on a bench
Why the **** does everyone follow a *****
These ******* lived where I lived they'd get hit

But the police dogs work for these *****
I disagree with how they hunt amongst us
Killers and kidnappers now my uncles lost
Systems clutching his ***** his minds the cost
Blames half with him when he pulls a knife to my throat
Half with them who left him with only a knife and a rope

Choice is crime or ******* die
I aint gonne lie if it were me then its crime
And **** the time **** a cop before I get stopped
**** a cop before I get popped for living on dimes
Everyone saw the signs if you didnt you lyin
Life is cheap and look whos out buyin

Your a slave same as me so beg your owner for closure
Or rise up and in a day your life faces foreclosure
Everything you are hit by an eraser got no place here
No more tears to cry anymore hollowed out by fear
And if my death draws near then clutch what you hold dear
Cause I'm burning this whole house down, its time for war

Dont care if I could live comfortable if my brothers live miserable
The conditions are all squalor look me in the eye tell me life isnt terrible
I dont have any wise parables no lesson to learn in this ****** fable
If you have no life, if you will never get to rise, only thing on the table
Is to burn this ******* down to the mortar
End everything give no quarter

No Fuehrer here just hate and fury
Feels like the time is late so lets hurry
**** living till January      
Within ashes I will be buried
With self-destruction I'm married

Once so loud gone quiet, read our lives plot synopsis
Where is pride when you live in edges of solipsis
In a stones shade I am alive treading after sisyphus

Hate so much hate it keeps me up late every night
It's not good for me but without it I'm a blank slate
Oh **** oh wait I think I've lost my childhood
And this adulthood taste like arsenic and blood
But I say I'm alright I'm great yeah I'm good

Anti-depressants for my rich friends
Narcotics in my poor friends
We all work robotic and live psychotic lives
My eyes always lie and all I hear is static
Addicts frantic to feel less feel less symptomatic

Slaves in the dirt slaves in the front
Modern capitalism is just a front
I will never escape this golden font
Drown in the money or in the debt
Don't think there's anyone happy left

Your pain, my pain
All the same
Heres rain, here’s Jane
An open flame

Calm the counterpart
Warm my broken heart
A lot on the flat mind
A lot like a flat line

I help you, to help me
Deja Vu, Deja Vu
I hurt you, it hurt me
I used to, follow through

Space without a sun
Race that cant be won
Room without a friend
Event none will attend

I want to help
I care about you
Don’t want to help
Don’t care about me

Your pain, my pain
All the same
Here's rain, here’s Jane
An open flame

Calm the counterpart
Warm my broken heart
A lot on the flat mind
A lot like a flat line

I help you, to help me
Deja Vu, Deja Vu
I hurt you, it hurt me
I used to, follow through

Space without a sun
Race that cant be won
Room without a friend
Event none will attend

I want to help
I care about you
Don’t want to help
Don’t care about me

Life is formed from the void of nothing
Life it ends when it becomes nothing

But its just another start
A neverending buffet cart

Empty of life picked clean
In a few blinks stocked again

Life is unending even when stars die
With a bang, teardrops will dot the sky

Cycles upon cycles life stretches onward inescapable
I won't hide from death but from life I would if i was able

Hate the voices in my head, they talk and talk
They can't stop cause they want me dead

Want love want life want another day
Nowhere left to go not okay not today

Take it day by day thats what they say
Take two pills today take me away

Nothings free especially not me
Soul on the deed sold for free

Tin flavor under the skin
Sins everywhere I've been

I'm the voices in my head
And my tongue is lead

Going extinct I'm at the brink
Just gotta think got to think
But i'm busy puking in the sink

Alt right rhetoric from a moderate pulpit
Or communist  heroics in the skin of a socialist
Pathological need to control peoples etiquette
Be any talking head that wears a crown tight
Power and control for the sake of it

Im still haunted by your embrace
Long after ive forgotten your face
Remember you were all hope and grace

I wonder if your still the same
The brightly burning flame
Do you still obsess over the game?

Pause. Save. Reset.
Start all over again
Every loss every win
Pause. Save. Reset.
Start all over again

All around me are zombies
What's up what's good homie
What do you want and of course I mean whatchu need
Cause God knows life ain't **** without gas to bleed

******* I must be cursed cause the sun ain't been out in days
And you know what they say crime pays
Pays for these cuts these scars things that stays with me for the rest of my days

Working every ******* day and that's the way it'll ******* stay
Cause when the work stops is when the reaper takes me away
I hear the worms crawling in the dirt in my brain everyday


Kidneys been bleeding for days that's how I know I'm still alive
Too many days fading into grays not even gonna ask why
This is life nonstop horror and another week's pay
Boots on again watching the bodies hang and sway

I found myself in the boundary of orbit in the planets perigee  
Void filled gospel only quandary's cause when I yell it don't answer me
Bespoken profits necessary debauchery  find your savior in 1-D
Lines raise erections green filled sensory experience money do grow on trees
Red losses, flaccid *****, and sorry stocks will put you on your knees
Blood will freeze with hell as corps marry investors and debtor steez
Calls dropped puts flopped moneys never stopped markets hit the rocks

How you doing are you feeling content?
No? Then just consume more content
Watch a show listen to a song
Get the popcorn tune in turn on
Everything is dark, the night is long

So just consume to the tune of a pop star
Your home is your tomb so get a car
And if that's not enough get four more
Happiness in jars sold at your local megastore
How long can I ignore my problems, maybe forever

Everyday devour the stars eat from palms of liars
We're all stars in a play and our stage is on fire
Over each other we climb up higher
Wonder how far you gotta to not get burned
How much can you buy how much have you earned

Enjoy the view of ones and zeros
Live vicariously through fake heros
Eat up your feed till its all you know
What did you see how was the show
Did you forget your all alone now

No? Then just consume till your bloated
The void remains unfilled and the colors are faded
Always so impatient have you waited
Time has been traded to the machine you did your part
In return it ripped out your heart

Every purchase almost feels like your really alive
Things to chase almost like a purpose to live
All of it to feel as if death isn't at your side
To hide from the fact that if you stop then you've died
So purchase, consume, eat up the happy lies

Live vicariously through heros who never lived
Watch villains make sport of mocking our lives
Look at your feeds watch as they water seeds
That decide our needs, Versace and Thneeds
We're in a sea of ads and digital goods

Look at all your things your heart almost beats
Are you feeling happy are you content?
Do you need more content?
We're all happy to sell anything or something
So we can buy something or anything

I can't exhale breath it all in
I've failed and I'm chokin
Lost and no ones looking

Ghost amongst smoke
Laughing without a joke
Smoke drags in till I croak

Do anything just to smile
Its been a ******* while
Its been the longest mile

Wasted I love it
My life spent wasted
Wasted my times spent

Show up at the party I'm already wasted
Day I was born my life was wasted
Roll it up, drop it down, pour it up lets get wasted

I can't exhale choked caps down
I'm the plug its all home grown
Dead head, death caps, did a pound

Did it all, ****** with Lucy and Mary
Memory hazy, eyes lazy, nothin phase me
Colors shifty on the nightly shine brightly

I've died on the daily does anyone feel me
I don't know but lately leaf comes freely
Acidy melty its unsightly really die nightly

Maybe I want it to take me
After that don't know where I'll be
Not here and unhappy, maybe

Absurdity is not real
everything means nothing
and nothing means nothing
nothing nothing nothing
…… hah it aint no thing

Bullet proof vests to go to school
Future is full of automatic tools
Streets got kids played like fools
And killers enforce the rules
While kings collect gold coins and jewels

War machines grind youth into years
Watch grown men get juiced for tears
Death in the mirror closer than she appears
Meanwhile and idle fool tries to keep his cheer
Its out of fear as his lover she draws near

Masks on in public no longer metaphoric
Ignore the pandemic you'll still catch it
Faceless claims made baseless face it  
Maskless heartless degenerates
They got an epidural so they cant feel ****

**** with negligence while pleading allegiance
Twenty twenty decade of the convergence
Some say year of the divergence
Glaciers lurk below the Dow index
the Titanic awash in market resurgence

Oh woe is me woe is me, woe is they
We won is what the slow in the head say
Cause we're all sitting in Pompeii
Don't matter if your candidate won yesterday
We all gonna be toe tagging today  

Whatchu you know about management, a delegate, a canidate
What your told what you heard its ****** sad isn't it
Don't know about Gadaffi, Benghazi, just emails from Hilary
Their propaganda prattle blaming the soup kitchen ladles
Act like cattle and they got you saddled and addled

Grew up in the country of giants where a gun is a common appliance
And if you show the law defiance you'll come to understand violence

One shot and your poverty stains the alley
I want to be somebody who escaped that valley
Its hard to be nobody puking out in the alley
Probably just be another body on the gurney

Moved smart, worked hard, played my part
Five shots in the dark now the heart don't start
Lost the keys now the car stays parked
Still got the gas to get higher stayin sparked

Jesus he won't save us pastors and nuns are just people
Won't save us they told us we were ****** from the steeple
So **** them take my thirty pieces of silver and turn to evil
If that's what it takes to survive and be successful
If that's what it takes to stay alive then I'll be awful

But I tell these kids to keep their chins up and stay out the dirt
Acting like our sins haven't buried them at birth life's gonna hurt

Thats the truth a lot more pain waits than was in our way
So I soak in vermouth to stay sane in the states of the fray

There's romance in a bottle of wine
Its rotten and dry but its divine

Heat waves shimmer every winters dimmer
But summer is an oncomer heat waves for the sinners
Shimmer for all the winners losers lost in the winter
Heatwaves they shimmer over the river
Here I shiver and I feel it in my liver
Heatwaves in my liver while I think about livin here
Winter draw nearer cold shivers an wood splinters
Another heatwave another summer another winter
Sit and shimmer if your a winner
I sit and shiver away the summer
Never ever shimmer lost in the river
Flowin in deep water I teeter totter
Falter heat waves in my liver
In the middle of winter
Always wanted to sit and shimmer in the summer
Be like those winners like stop and shimmer in the mirror
But in water life go where it go always forward never clearer
Never fair without care about who or where waves in layers
Everyone a player some losers some winners all those sinners
Come winter all shiver but not all shimmer not all star chasers
Seein farther than father or how I got here visions clearer
Seers in the shimmer life livers who go farther than their father
While others sit and shiver in winter thinking about dinner
Some summer I'm gonna shimmer like just look at him in the mirror

Problems get bigger so pour more liquor
Livers get sicker as I chase a few figures
Faded pictures the past moves quicker

3 missed calls sorry for never calling back
But I'm just the worst ghost in your past
I haunt those that loved me before I crashed

Am I dead to you yet?
I still remember when I held you as you wept
I remember crying about you when I slept

I don't have a reason to exist
My life is just broken promises
Broken dreams, broken things I list

"News"
How fun is it to stay inside your cage
Reading a script from the given page
Rot away or receive your wage
Feed off the rust and **** slave

"Factory Floors"
Wave away H2S as I asphyxiate  
Corpse still strung on by opiates
Strung out to facilitate production
Combustion, institutions, and human waste

"Hedgerows"
Trained to work tenderize the pork
Worlds burning on its axis they call that winning
Champagne uncorked to celebrate burnt pitchforks
Worlds spinning on averages call that living

"Holders"
Hate and madness marches on the enemy
The friendless say that that's a friend to me
Pain holds hands with misery forms a circle
Maintain and enter me to continue the cycle

"Paper Hands"
If you lose your will to fight then fall from the fire light
Pitch black abyss or pure white emptiness both lack sight
To and forth I vacillate from deep black to blinding light
I reject it and accept it because neither is right

"Diamonds"
Pop there goes your whole stock
The worlds leaking from its locks
As you try to cannibalize your flock
Not wolves your mocked by the sheep

Thousand bullets a second call me Trigger-Tron
Heaters out can't cool it I'm on a ****** marathon
Wanted posters dead or alive the names Trigger, Tron
Rode off into sunsets with twin lead trails drawn

Saddle up go round an round I been outta town
Makin ghost towns when I do my rounds
Addled up go round for round then head outta town
Souls wander I put em in the lost an found

Money bags with the big $ just a lil' bank robbery
Heavy saddle bags ridin out with all I can carry
Money bags with the big $ just a lil' train robbery
Heavy saddle bags rode out with all I could carry

Thousand bullets a second they call me Trigger-Tron
Heaters on fire I ****** in marathons
Wanted posters out name on the bounty, Trigger-Tron
I ride into the sunset with twin lead trails drawn

The young Billy with the Iron "I'll make ya famous"
Rustlin jimmys sheriff and posse never catch us
Billy draws the big Iron "I'll make ya famous"
Rustlin Jimmys with the iron in *******

The sheriff and his posse after my bounty
If they wanna hound me I'm your huckleberry
Sheriff and posse, lotta bodys dead in the county
Fresh tombstones last count was about twenty

Hounds down like old yeller guns sure like to holler
Winds down at night retire the dual death dealers
Coyotes creep towards the fire start up a holler
From bush an ambush a few more dead 'fellers

Hands quicker than rattle snakes draw an fire
Leads flyin hills rattle an shake guess its war
Outlaws firin shells sounds like a two pair
My hands five aces four shots they fold for sure

Then I ride off into the sunset with twin lead trails drawn

Wake and bake, feel the pain
Shake and puke, rotten grain

everyone at a distance
Dead moths in the lens
Everyone loves to pretend
but thats just a pretense
Lithium lights are our friends
Helium heights chemical highs
everybody lies nobody cries
So get ****** take flight
Go get money every night
keep chasing bright lights
Feel the heat in signs
And be burnt by the times
over ashes they shine
Many are dead by thirtynine
Oh well guess we're doing fine
we made it, we touched it, we died

I'm sorry but I don't know what for
This worry I cant stand it anymore
My brain is stabbing  my heart
The pain is pulling  me apart

Brains pulling on the strings
Straining against the heart
Till my blood starts to sing
Of a life falling apart

And my brain wonders why
I feel all this pain and misery
Why do I fall low why do I fly
Its unstable chemistry

One day I feel so alive
The next I might just die
Next all endless drive
To numb and dead eyed

Scars on my back match the scars on my lungs
I can't ever take it back I've already made the jump
Funny thing is now I don't hate myself
Funny thing is now all I have is myself
Self love narcissism and wealth
Roads paved listen as I pour out my health
Woes and leaves fall where I once knelt

Deaths on the wind
Like *** on my skin
Breath of the end
Violence my hymn

Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever
Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever

Never talkin ****
Never takin it
Now I take a hit
And pass the ****

Never sink to a putdown
Never will I be a letdown

If I go down I always know I'll never be out
I'm not in it to get paid ain't about all that clout
False laurels and accolades, not something to flout
People always frontin don't even know what they about

These fake people always say you ain't a fan of that
"Oh I bet you don't even know this, know that"
"Bet you don't really feel the way you feel" It falls flat
Don't need to put down, to know I feel so let's run it back

"Oh **** man, you a fan of that"
"Did you know this, know that"
"I feel you and I feel that"
No need to doubt some idle chit chat

Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever
Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever

Heard from a friend lost in the wild hadn't seen em in a while
Asked for my help and knew that I'd be there with a smile
Didn't matter to me that I had to walk there over four miles
Never turn the back on someone who I know trusts my smile

Always there to help and if you can't hit me back
Then don't worry just do what you can and stay on track
Never put myself in a position where I can't come back
And if I ever did I know I have Friends so I can fall back

That trusts been broken but I won't give in
Won't **** the trust I hold because a few gave in
Few scars on this back where they put the blade in
Forgiven but never will I let it be forgotten

Never forgetting that I can't trust them
And it makes me sad because I love them
But if all they have is that hate then **** them
Still unhappy knowing they can't love themselves

Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever
Dirt on my name never
My loyalty is forever
My loyalty is forever
This loyalty is forever

This love is forever

Grew up without a hand to hold
Only company was my soul
No one ever mistook me for cool

Dreams of friends and a world I want
watching dead ends rotting with the bunch
Seeds and stems left by my captain crunch

Daddy was an addict but he never panicked
taught me that magic was found in the cracks
That form from tragic lives never looking back

Never knew trust or understood the judge
Nothing was ever just as I stood in the sludge
And rent a center furniture stole my lunch

A B honor roll so honored by my academics
To poor for it to matter maybe I'm a cynic
But I know my masters I'm just realistic

Grew up to be someone I don't know
Where did that little kid go
And why is everything so so