Anya - Hello Poetry

Mar 2019

Arisa

i'm sorry.
the leftover pizza
hidden in the back of the fridge,
just looked so tasty.

- the smell of pepperoni still lingers on my shirt.

I was hungry, okay?

#pizza #pepperoni #roommate #flatting #fridge #food #yummy #leftovers

Mar 2019

Iska

Eyes That Lie

A chance encounter,
from cross the way.
If you had spoken,
what would you say?

My eyes darted to yours,
Though they were disguised,
I thought for sure what they saw
was a lie.

Should I have smiled?
Should I have cried?
Instead I looked on,
For I couldn't decide.

Could you read the words
that I can't find?
Read them in my sunlit eyes?

Does distance and time
obscure your sight?
Or is it that I didn't
say the words quite right?

Should I have yelled?
Should I have screamed?
I couldn't tell,
For nothing is as it seems.

My heart beat faster
what is it I feared?
I continued to walk
as if nothing was amiss
But my mind wasn't clear.

I know it's not fair,
To ask who your with
But I can't help but wounder
Was I so easily replaced?

You seemed so happy,
So bright and alive.
To take that away..
Is not my place to decide.

Should I have kept walking?
Should I never have looked?
But I couldn't help it.

She was quite pretty,
Your new little friend
And I'm glad that your happy.

Because we were only just friends.
Yes.
Not star-crossed lovers
But the best of friends.

But that doesn't stop me
from missing you,
It doesn't make me not want to cry,
It can't hold back
the dread of replacement,
Or the jealousy at
the spark in your eyes.

I used to make you laugh like that,
It was my job to make you grin
I held the title best friend
With pride,
Is it hers now to win?

We all speak of lovers
And hearts that won't repair.
Yet when it comes to
the parting of friends,
I doubt it could compare.

The timeless days
that slipped away.
The giddy grins
And thoughtless things
That make up a
flawlessly flawed friend
Is what we miss dearly in the end.

It's not just breakups that cause us to break

#friend #relationship #lost #broken #jealous #miss

Anya Mar 2019

Insecurity, thy old ...Friend...?

aAAAAHHHHhhhh
Insecurity, thy old friend, so much
like Insect,
except you have a "uri" before the t and a "y" after
Possessively hogging my attention
Away, keeping me engaged
Until,
Everything else slips away from me one by one,
               by                     one
                      by          one
                             by
And all I am left with is you,
only you,
And I bask in you, and sink in you, and merge-

...

Insecurity,
thy old friend
For old time's sake,
Just,
Leave me alone,
Or,
Do I have to ignore you?

...

Even though you're screaming,
In my head
Even though,
you have the ability,
to take over everything and anything
Till all that's left is a-

aAAAAAAHHHHHhhhhh
Insecurity,
The monster in my closet
The monster under my bed
The monster-

Or more like-
A shape shifter,
As pleasant as a cloud
Until,
you give her attention

Then, she greedily
       gobbles it                             up

...

And
                you

#insecurity #friend #rant #sections #emotions

Anya Feb 2019

Can I do

Acedemics, I have some
Control
Art, they say I’m good
They say I’m smart
Acedemically

What if the world was controlled by
Athleticism?

Or,
Social skills?
Which it partially is

But,
I’m smart
I’m talented
I tell myself
Yet-

There’s so much-
I keep myself from
Let myself
Be intimidated by

The supposed
Best years of my life
More like

I’m

Holding

Myself

Back

Am I?
Am I really?

I look at those
Worse than me

And I feel secure

I look at those
Better
A seemingly larger majority

And that security unravels
Like a shriveled up plant

I’m
I
I
Iiiiiii
What

It’s scccccintimmmmidate-

I dunno
Why am I in such a mood?

Hopeless,
Am I?

If I can’t even,
Get the one think I’m good at right
What,
Can I do?

#melancholy #emotions #reflections #thoughts

Anya Feb 2019

Disapears

I have a box
A nice cozy box
I try to make my way to the
But...I never make it
Out

That doesn’t matter
It’s still fun to try
To push my limits

But

Still in never out
I won’t go out
I. Can push
But I. Cannot
Go out

Because it’s warm and cozy in this box
I know what I can do,
I know,
The extent of my abilities

Why should,
I push through?

You’ll be regretting those words,
One day
She tells me

I don’t care

Fine,
But what if
Your protected world
Just
Disappears

Drip

Drop

Drip

...

#box #enclosed #melancholy #emotions #reflecting #analogy

Anya Feb 2019

Regret

My mouth, awash with the remnant of the 320 calorie pack of six oreos I know I shouldn't have bought
My eyes glazed after succumbing to the irresistible allure of hours of youtube rather than the exam I should be studying for
My mind entrenched in every stupid thing I've ever said or done (quite a list if I may say so myself)
When all you see is a little girl
Studiously typing away

#regret #feelings #studying #stupid #thoughts

Anya Feb 2019

The hair, the tie, and Me

The strands tangle and twist
As if my finger,
Is the center of a tiny universe
Of interlocking twining twirling black
With a simple twist and snap
Are ripped,
Star crossed lovers
Every Romeo to his Juliet
Are rip, rip, ri-torn apart
The hair from the hair tie

Yet,
Like tentacles clinging on
A stubborn slug, repulsive
Yet in an obscure manner
Admiringly persistent
It continues to hold on

Like a lizard regrows it’s tail
Impossible,
To truly chop off
So too does the hair insist
Upon an adamant refusal to separate

As if hair and tie are one
Interlocked
In a ferocious battle... Or,
Perhaps, a passionate embrace?
Are they one?

Whether it be so or not
I decide not to bother
Why, should I take up the mantle
Of the evil stepmother, wicked witch, cruel king...
You name it
To separate the two, lovers or competitors
They maybe

Why insist,
Upon what will never
Come true,
At least,
In the case of any proper Disney fairy tale

Is what I tell myself,
throwing down the hair tie
In favor of writing poetry about it

#hair #tie #funny #thoughts #stubborn #analogies