I felt it; that numbness.
I closed my eye's, breathed you in and pray that you would never let go.
The moment of release, i felt my heart slowly withering away.
Exchanged I love you's , hugs and kisses
Wiped my tears aw if i was trying to wipe away the pain
got in my car and drove away.

And you looked at me, without saying a word and i knew...
That it would never be the same.

Ever since I could remember I longed to be loved. But not just any love, the love that I could see
The love that was lusted by others. Love I could call my own, but instead it’s borrowed.
Borrow from anything or someone because I can’t find the place I thought I left it.
I searched on the top cabinet, underneath my bed but I still could not find it.
I looked in my car, just in case I drove away with it.
I looked inside the heart of the one I call my love but, it was empty or
Maybe I just cannot see what I don’t feel.

I hate you; because you made me love you.
I grew the feeling of needing you, and wanting you more than i told myself i ever would.
I built these walls that kept me safe, to soften the blows that the world throws at you.
The collected all the pieces that were cheaped away throughout the years.
I have this unshakable feeling that you are going to
to shatter my world. That you are going to disappear and i'll be left with brittal walls and a tourched heart.
You'll leave me picking up the pieces that i picked up once before.
You would leave me without my smile, my laugh, and that feeling of complete peace.
I hate that i love you, but all i ask is that you stay a little while longer.