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If I search my depths I cannot find
the reason why I hate you,
I know I've searched and I know I've tried
And I know I can't escape you,

It's been years and years it's been
And I know that things have changed
And I know that hatred is the source,
Of my unyielding pain,

But I can't let go of this feeling
When I see your face,
The blood in my heart begins to boil
And rush up to my face,

It hurts again and it hurts like then
And I feel some sort of hell,
And I feel those feelings come out like steam
And scream from deep in their cell-

"I want you gone or I want you dead-
Not in this life or any,
But inside of me your fingers remain
and have done damage aplenty."

I hope you hear these cries I make
For they cannot ever be spoken,
And I hope you know I mean no harm
But my peace can bear no token,

I am here and I am strong
And I am loud and I am Marshall,
But yet I break with ease,
I hope you know I'm trying my hardest
And please grant me some kind of peace.
Beady almond eyes, cocoa butter skin, hot chocolate on his breath.
     Grandpa is here, no worries or fear.
I adore the way his soft cheeks flush pink every time he laughs, and how his frame is so fragile during a hug.
     How is a man so weak, so strong?
When grandpa is here, everything feels safe, everyone is so kind.
       He makes me feel so special, I hope I make him feel the same.
        Ohhhh how I miss you so Grandpa!!!!!
My days are so cold and empty without you, I often sit in your favorite comfy chair and sip hot cocoa just to feel close to you.
Grandpa love is not strong enough a word for my emotions toward you.
    Grandpa......  I miss you!!!!
I                                         
   Saw                               
            A                           
               Rat                    
                         Today,        

Made
Me
Think
Of
You


This is actually about no person in particular, just some little thing I thought up, but....  If you think this poem is about you, then it probably should be.
Have A Great Day!
 Oct 2014 Ayman Zain
Sia Jane
I'm made of all;
The books I've ever read
Poems I've ever written
Faces who have smiled at me
Hugs that have wrapped around me
Caresses that have graced my inner thigh
Countries & continents my feet have touched
The lovers as we simultaneously reach ecstasy within
Lonely nights shedding tear drops
Nights gazing black skies moon & stars
Children falling asleep to my heartbeat
Animals whose soul was found through reflective eye stares
Conversations spoken in French, Spanish, Italian, Xhosa, Afrikaans, Norwegian, German
Years of ******-, cognitive-, dialectical-, art-, drama-, music-, mindfulness-, trauma-, psychiatry-; therapies
The drinks & drugs & mind altering substances dispersing my mind
In all I'm made of;
Love
Lust
Greed
Fear
Joy
Freedom
Longing
Dreams
Despair
Sadne­ss
Anger
Frustrations
Happiness
Anxieties
Insecurities....

In all I'm made of;

A soul; securely contained within a body of battled scars;
over;
pain & triumphs, losses & gains, rejections & acceptances, dishonours & accolades...

With the hope; she too, can live life through.

© Sia Jane
Written at 1.53am
 Oct 2014 Ayman Zain
Haydn Swan
****** up,
tuned in,
tripped on the up game,
out on a whim.
 Oct 2014 Ayman Zain
Bunhead17
There's nothing more attractive
Then a faithful man
#Real man are faithful
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