I was never good enough but I was never nothing. I was always worthless but that’s gotta be worth something . I fell in love and I fought I choked and I lost my heart was broken but I’m learning from the mistakes. I might not be pretty but everyone is beautiful in there own way. I might lie but its because I’m scared to be judged by the truth.I  have never been kissed but some words have there ways and when I’m really sad I always say to myself  hopefully there are better days.

In love with you, but you do not know it yet. For now I will leave you my roses upon your doorstep. Leaving you to wonder who fancies you so. My sweet Angel I am never letting you go.

He looked at her as she walked into the room.
But then  he couldn’t pull his eyes away from her view.
Then his negativity caught up.
The devil on his shoulder saying...
                * shes so beautiful why would she like you?”
   So he forced himself to tear his eyes away.

But then she looked back at him.
She just couldn't keep away
But then the voice inside her head said “ * he’s so handsome why would he want me?”
And she dragged her eyes away.

Too bad they never knew , too back they walked away.

" Well, You talk like yourself but i hear someone else.
Yea you look like yourself but your somebody else."

YOUR MAKING ME NERVOUS

Your lies have hurt , why do you talk sweetly to my face then turn around a spit them out with hate. Why do you pass around bad rumors like a mad note, if your trying to be funny well its a sad joke.
You hurt me but I did not see it until it was too late. I cut off the chain that connected us. I bought a ticket to fly away from your negative space. Then I will rinse myself with soap so your hate might just wash right away.

Smiling all day but she drowns in sorrow.
Laughing these days just figure it out tomarrow.
When shes quiet when you complain your dad didnt do what you wanted wonder why shes broken hearted.

Her soft brown skin has gone away with the harsh cold wind.
she is now one of the many ghosts around here. I miss her.
she went back home. I was the last to know.I never wanted her to go.
I hope shes happy. I hope she's okay.Her face is bright in my mind like a lovely dream,  yes she was lovely and she was a queen.

Your  hair floats like a balloon.

Your eyes are the color of smoke.

I was the key and you were the keyhole.

We used to go together ...

But when I tried to get to you we just didn’t connect.

You must of changed the lock now its for someone else to open.

But now you’ve left me here I have no one else to open so im just sitting here....
                          BROKEN

                                                    And


     ­                                                           *USEL­ESS

I will be gone so quick you won't  have time to miss me..
Take care of my heart ,Ive left it with you.

Emma.
Blue.
Sad.
Skinny.
Pain.
Hurt.
Lies.
Yellow but not happy.
Skateboard.
Car.
Oh no.
Ankle.
Cast.
Limp.
Green and sick.
Food.
Toilet.
Flush.
Red but not love.
Razor. Shower.Water.
Band aid.
Pink lips pressed against another’s
But not mine
I guess we were always just friends.

Your a field of flowers I want to be in all day.

Your a sunflower simple but sweet.

Your a rose a beauty to me despite the thorns.

Why does my heart take five seconds to fall in love with someone like chill
I don't even know his favorite color yet. But its already reciting its vows. Such a sad thing to find it broken .

They tell me "I love you" but its not just what you think your supposed to say. Its what you know when your ready. I love you means I have no other words to  describe how your my everything.
Because half the I love you's I hear they leave and say it wasn't what they mean. Im waiting on my world to come. I just met  some stars along the way.

Grown Up is all she wanted to do to be a big girl was  going to be a dream come true. Well she grew up and reality hit. Yes i can go on a roller coaster by myself yes I can have a phone ... I get all these privileges. But Im not a little girl. I don't have the sweet innocence of a child. I don't have the mind of a child that doesn't care what people think because I care. I don't want to but I keep going back  and now the big girl wants to backwards and be a little girl. A happy girl a free girl.

All these flavors and you choose to be salty.... > u <

She asked if I was loyal.I  grabbed her face gently and said. "If I wasn't loyal I would make you unhappy .And I never wanna see you anything less than happy." Your smile is my sun on a rainy day.

When you talk to someone sometimes your simple hello brings them out of their hell.

Just a simple hello could make someone’s day

how could you do that with a child attached to your body. Living in your womb.
How could you not care about what it would do.
How could you leave her crying on the table and you walking out the hospital room doors. With 100% of methathine inside her veins.
How could all you leave was a name and the sad pang of your heartbeat streaming through her ears.
How could you.  
Not even come back.
How could I still want to find you.
And ask a why?
How could you hurt me..... Im Damaged and Broken your heartbeat is still my favorite song.

I don't know why i still love, why im still holding on , my feelings are here ,are yours gone?

I love you he said it make my knees go weak.
I love you he said , I couldn’t speak .
I love you goodnight he said it was sweet.
I love you he said in a whisper ,goodbye oh why did you make me cry.
I love you he said , Hey Kaleb? Is that another lie?

In the dark.
I let myself shiver.
If I had a lover .
I wish they would hold me.
I wish they were there.
     So I don’t focus on the monster that’s not there reaching for my neck.
But  instead,their heartbeat when I put my head on there chest.
Like a flashlight in a dark tunnel.

I CAN SEE THAT EVERYTHING AHEAD IS GOING TO BE OKAY






* to bad I left it in the basement and it’s out of batteries*
    Like I am weak when they leave me

Mom, her phone is dead
Dad,at work with mom both leaving again for church.
Kayla, at work she tells me to call later but I know her routine smoke,shower,sleep,maybe eat.
I have ten minutes left who to call , Eric ,voicemail. Emma, voicemail, call again mom picks up , she is out skating, Babe, home phone is weird , call the safe house  not allowed to call ,not on the phone list,I look for grandmas phone number surely she will answer, voicemail,I leave a message to call back at eight. She never did it’s midnight. Nobody to talk to. Roommate is snoring. Who decided to put her with the lightest sleeper...? The answer.. I don’t ******* know. They think I’m perfect well... check again.Im tired and I’m bored and starting to realize the next two weeks are going to be hell.

Lips. They produce words that can hurt,that can love,that can feel, that can break and can heal. I miss your lips on mine.

Its just plain delicious , its pretty healthy , I could eat it every other day. Too bad Im not wealthy up to 15$ for a meal thats not a price I wanna pay. But Its delicious. Im saving my money to get one on saterday.

I tasted you lips. they were bittersweet. turns out you already shared them this week.

It starts as a sprout vunrable and weak it needs support.
Then Its stem turns stronger until it can stand on its own.
Then comes growth it will be taller than all the other trees.
Then comes time where it learns to adapt and has wisdom of the past.

“Im  like a tree , I have grown tall and strong, I have gone through hard times and I have had people try to knock me down. When it was time to fall I left memories scars. Stories , memories. So you could learn how to be a tree too.” - Grandma

Please don't leave. I know its selfish but when your gone I am left with the person I hate the most, Myself.

when I wake up im afraid that people will forget my name.
that somebody else might take my place

That, you were stressed out, money was tight, big sister always wanted to fight, so you told mom you needed to say goodbye, i dont know why you chose her but you got with Big sisters tenth grade teacher. Then you realised it was a mistake and got back with mom your lucky she took back. All that ****** up my social life. But I understand that you were confused and you thought everything that was right. I forgive you Dad, I’ll be just fine. - Noah

My fingers dance up to your neck and then to the zipper of your dress. In a pitch black room but my lighthouse is you.
Holding you here you smell like lilac perfume.
I wake up . It was all my imagination...
The smell of Lavander on my pillow.
Wishing it was of your lilac scent so I can continue my dream.

I hate  the water , but I'd jump in for,
                                        * YOU


I hate this cold but If you shiver I will take off my hoodie and warm,
                                            YOU
I hate math but I would do a whole page for,
                                        
                ­                                 YOU
* If your real and you find me someday Im just saying Im here waiting,
                                            
waiti­ng for...
                                            YOU
(­as long as forever*)

If you wanna be a kid be a kid . If you dont wanna grow up you have time, I grew up too fast I left my childhood behind.If you want , you can always have mine.

She looked at the screen she saw the  skinny ,sculpted, beautiful people lock into a kiss and she wondered. Is this what you have to look like to be loved ? I have to have perfect cheekbones , and beautiful eyes, a  hourglass waist  plump lips, a bright smile? Long hair,curves,to wear the perfect clothes? Jeans and a crop top? All i want is love she thought why do we have to work so hard ? He grabbed her face and kissed her and he said I love you I don't care if you don't look like the girls on the movie screen its your sweetness and kindness and compassion.  You are you and thats what I love about you.

Lust , love either one leaves me to dust..after everything they have done it’s hard to trust. Hard to believe when they say I love you it’s not another broken promise.

He is handsome , I feel he is caviar I am just a can of sardines, I’m the taxi he is a smooth limousine ,He is wonderful,why do I feel weak , He is a rose I am a sunflower I’m okay but he will always look better.and now I question does he even love me?

“* your my tylonal when im in pain, that i take when my head hurts, your my sunshine when it rains, your my coffee that I need in the morning,your my smile when im feeling blue, you kinda make me feel like the feeling you get after your first kiss except everyday you make me feel like this,your my water when im stuck in the in the desert, if life is a movie than your the best part, your like a tall glass of lemonade on a summer day, your exactly what I need,your so beautiful sometimes I stop to close my eyes*”

**** me please nobody would miss me , you would do them a favor, because I am  myself people leave. Pull the trigger as I am crying softly.

no matter if you yell or scream whisper or move  i already know your saying
we hate you
You get mad when i don't wanna talk to you or be around your sad i spend my time in my room well maybe if you stop treating me like im my mother then i would hate you less too

(NOT ALL FAMILY'S ARE HAPPY)

Searching for empty words but here was only U.

Fake people don't surprise me anymore, real people do.

Seeing the one your in love with ,In love with someone else is so sadly frustrating.

Thank you guys some of my poems are should be a novel... But thanks for reading them and leaving likes and commenting and EVERYTHING. Im so thankful for my readers and followers... Y'all AMAZING.... :P Sorry you have to deal with my ****** side

IM FINE , HONESTY

Its the big thing until they are hungry for more than good looks..

Is it just time for vacation? Beacause everyone I seem to know is leaving.
They don't say goodbye. I wonder where they go. They bring there suitcases  full of our memeories.It must be a beautiful place. Away from me. Must be why they never come back.

Pick myself off my bed the the annoying song of the alarm, just wanna fall back a s l e e p ...  NO, wake up. I get dressed. I get ready. Maybe skipping breakfast. I go down to the starbucks down the block with a double shot latte.You know i stayed up all night might grab another, Getting dropped off. Drown myself in music. Walk down then into school. Open the door sit down.Heh always the first one they float in one by one. The teacher stands she opens her mouth " algebra 2" who even decided to make math 1st period,,, Cross Multiply..divide..find X. Like I am going to the store and using that as a skill...My thought wander. **** the  coffee never worked and I am fast asleep half way through 2 period mumbling about a argument between X and Y ... counting  Z zzz... *asleep