I want to say I know how I feel

But to be honest I have no ******* clue

Am I happy or sad? Am I green or blue?

oh how I wish I knew

What triggered this?

I don't know

But maybe it’s ok if I don’t

Do I always have to know?

I don't know

And I think its ok to not know

Because I feel like it’s bigger than me

feelings, emotions, love, hate, jazbadi, barbadi

Sure I feel them, and sometimes I recognize them too

But all of these things are beyond me, and my current body

that this soul has wanted to reside in this time

i wonder….

Do I get to claim the body or the soul?

Which one is truly mine?

i guess it depends

Who is I?

The body or the soul?

maybe I am the emotions themselves

Maybe I am the feelings that arise when the soul and this body align

Am I the electricity that runs through this body when it feels exhilarated  

Am I the feeling of warmth when a loved one gives this body a hug

Or am I the rage that causes this body to feel like it wants to explode

Possibly, am I the boulder that sits on the heart of this body when saddened

i am all of those feelings and more

I am THIS soul that chose THIS body at THIS time of space continuum  

But what I can’t say is why? because That’s someone else’s job

Thank god, because Lord knows this job is no joke

what I can say is whoever is doing all of this, thank you… thank you so much

For letting this soul experience the closest thing to magic there is… INSANIYAT