"backtracks" poems
Neurons knit
I wake
a bit
sluggishly
slothlike to the kitchen
eyes twitching
kettle whistling.
too noisy,
he
backtracks to the bedroom.
Eventually,
brain In gear
dressed
ready to go out and
here
he hesitates
thinks
shall I
make another coffee?
Oct 14, 2021
Oct 14, 2021 at 1:00 AM UTC
You walk the whitened snow
in overcast-shadowed delight
You look back seeing
where your tracks traced you
from where you were before,
like words written on
snowy white paper
holding memories
gone by...
Your mind slowly
backtracks
to places only moments ago,
where small inclined drifs
on each side
reminded you
of miniature mountains,
you were a GIANT
in the middle of a tiny valley...
Sounds became muffled,
your planet became
transformed into another world
Silence prevailed,
brief shrilling sporadic gusts
nipped at your nose, nipped at your cheeks,
and had painted
your living portrait red...
You had felt your feet
crunch down
on the newly
softened snow,
its sounds created noise
that crunched LOUDLY...
In some places,
your wider lifting strides
became arduous,
they became wider in deeper spots,
but you did not mind...
This whitined fact
almost held by fantasy
ridiculed everyday life,
silhouetted trees
reached their bare arms upward
like black grayish winter phantoms
against the white horizon,
against the gray sky...
Tiny windy whirlpools
-ever so often-
danced around your feet
in a soft swirling
celebration
of your delight...
Charmed by your exploration
you had embraced every moment
Clever in your adoration
you now invoke this poem,
distinguished only
for the astute...
...Provoked by this flurry
wisdom and wonderland,
you now turn slowly
around then forward
Now realizing you have
just left your memories
and poet's signature
within those very backtracks
you have just left behind... .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .' .'
Sep 29, 2014
Sep 29, 2014 at 9:50 AM UTC
Moving On from Moving On
June 11, 2014 at 11:36pm
Musings by Vivvy Walker
When I got divorced people were helpful and understood
I was moving on.
They knew it was a BIGGIE
A big, huge, ginormous time in my life
I was moving on.
They helped me. I helped me.
Everyone was familiar with the process.
The pitfalls. The backtracks.
The wins. The successes.
I was moving on.
And now I am firmly entrenched in vague territory.
I have moved on.
And I need to move on. From moving on.
I moved. I packed. And unpacked.
All the baggage. Physical and emotional.
I am post-moving on
I am done.
I no longer need to work ridiculous hours.
Or raise my girls alone.
Or be alone.
I always thought it would be easy when I was done
Moving on.
But it is hard
To reprioritize yet again.
To reorganize my life & thoughts (yet again)
To adjust
To be laid-back. And free. And funny.
I have to constantly remind myself
I'm no longer moving on
That chapter has closed.
It is time for my voice
To be heard.
For my dreams.
To be realized.
For me
I think of the men and women who- like me
Have moved on
And I raise a glass
Coffee, wine, beer, *****
Drink with the little umbrella
I toast you
The changelings, the chameleons
The doers, the movers
And shakers
Those crazy laughing' probies'
Of life post divorce
I toast you
The tortoises
The 'long run' winners
Those plodding wonderful people
Of life post-divorce
I toast you
My fellow butterflies
My new wing-having friends
All those who cried
And then didn't anymore
Post-divorce
I toast you
For bravery
And audacity
And showing me how to move on
From moving on
Post-divorce
~Vivvy Walker 6/12/14
Aug 5, 2014
Aug 5, 2014 at 3:22 AM UTC
I dreamt of you last night
You wrapped your arms to me tight
It felt so warm and comforting
That familiar sensation I am still longing.
You said you wanted me back
Then suddenly all the memories backtracks
Words cannot describe how delighted I was
But my feelings cannot tolerate anymore pain that you might cast.
Why did our time have past?
It all went by so fast
Is this the sign that I should bury our past?
The thought makes my heart crack and wants to blast.
My dream slowly fades to black
I end up crying because I, too wants you back
Only you will fill what my heart lacks
Guess, you are still the dream I wish won’t last.
Jun 6, 2020
Jun 6, 2020 at 3:05 PM UTC
Amazing how opinions
Suddenly become facts
When the court becomes a minefield
And no one ever backtracks
They just keep on marching forward
Stomping all over the sanity
Of those who have no hope of any reward
For keeping a check on their own vanity
They don't scream it from the rooftops
They pace themselves like a funeral dirge
Slow and steady till everyone's ready
For the real persona to emerge
Hyperdrive.... man alive
Where the hell did that come from
It was hiding in the darkend corner
Waiting for the time to be right
To emerge upon the senses of those around
Who absolutely positively haven't got a clue
That imagination is not ...just
An abstract situation
Where part timers can go to feel
Some sense of satisfaction
It's a full time job
Where the verbal grenades that you lob
May make a point or get a laugh
Or blow up in your face
But if there is dedication
To the value that you accepted
As a reward
For your part and expanding the mundane
From small talk and small thinking to....
Revelations and education and new paths
To be explored
Where the minefields have become diffused
And reality has become... so confused
By an opinion that has suddenly become
Chiseled into stone
Where you and you alone
Know the combination to
The lock........ You possess
To a strong box
Full of small talk and small thinking
That you are always finding is impossible
Impossible....impossible.....
IMPOSSIBLE.....
............TO DISPOSSESS
Dec 16, 2015
Dec 16, 2015 at 4:38 AM UTC
Peddling backwards
up a steep hill
gets me nowhere
Instead it ends up
with me in a
heap at the bottom
gasping for air.
Shame, I think;
the weather could be nice up there.
Nov 18, 2013
Nov 18, 2013 at 10:24 AM UTC
He stands on a cliff called love
Overlooking the abyss
I call out behind him
He’s ready.
He backtracks along the rocky surface
My face turns dark
The earth beneath him gives way
He’s falling.
He reaches out
Clawing at the darkness
My hands grab his
He’s safe.
I stand on a cliff called love
Overlooking the abyss
He calls out behind me
I’m ready.
I backtrack along the rocky surface
His face turns dark
The earth beneath me gives way
I’m falling.
I reach out
Clawing at the darkness
The abyss swallows me
I’m alone.
- t.h.
Oct 18, 2019
Oct 18, 2019 at 2:05 PM UTC
I WAS LOST,I WAS ALONE
WHEN YOU CAME
LIKE A TWINKLING STAR
INTO MY DARK NIGHTS
WHEN I FOUND MYSELF/
BUT I WAS NOT THAT LUCKY
BECAUSE WITH ME
LIFE HAS
ALWAYS BEEN MURKY//
BUT NOW I WILL LIVE BECAUSE
YOU TAUGHT ME HOW TO BE
HAPPY
MAYBE I WAS NOT YOURS
OR YOU WERE MINE
STILL I WILL SAY IT AGAIN
YOU CHANGED ME
ITS YOUR AURA THAT MADE ME.
THINK
LIFE IN NEW WAYS
AND YOUR THOUGHT MADE MY.
DAYS
STILL WHEN I RECOLLECT YOU
I CAN SEE MY INNERSELF
THAT SAYS ,
LET'S LIVE (LIFE) IN A NEW WAY/
WHERE HAPPINESS IS SANCTITY
WHERE THERE IS NO PAIN AND
LUST//
SIDE ASIDE ALL YOUR EARTHLY
ENTITY
AND COME BACK/COME BACK.
AGAIN//
(MONEY PRIDE)NOTHING IS
IMMORTAL/
THE ONLY EVERLASTING THING IS
YOUR
SOUL/
SO BE FREE, FREE FROM (ALL) YOUR
BACKTRACKS AND
YOUR MUNDANE POSSESSIONS.
BREAK ALL THE MYTHS/
GIVE UP THE RUST OF YOUR SOUL/
BE AUDACIOUS/
AND COME BACK AGAIN/COME
BACK...//
LIFE IS SHORT,LIFE IS
INVALUABLE
(SO) DON'T JUST WASTE IT
KNOW YOURSELF
AND BE THE GREATEST OF YOURS.
TILL
THIS DATE.
MY FRIEND, (LET'S) BREAK ALL
THE PREJUDICES
MAKE THE WORLD YOURS AND
COME BACK
COME BACK AGAIN...
Feb 13, 2021
Feb 13, 2021 at 11:20 PM UTC
"I am broken" slides off the tongue easy,
but leaving the dream is not as thrilling
I have made friends with my cracks that I
I don't remember how not to be broken
We sit and chat around the bonfire of my, insecurities....
Laughing on, about our best memories
....Memories of heartache, depression betrayal,,
of obscurities
that Kindled my life as long as I can remember.
I think,
I'm now addicted...
To holding hands with my pieces
To the warmth of my insecurities
To the peace when I trace my, backtracks
I think I'm now addicted,
.... to the lies painted by my smile
to the tingling feeling when my heart is pricked by arrows of, disappointment
To the reality of feeling uncomfortable in my skin
Because to me that is, contentment.
I am broken,
Parts of me can no longer fit, together.
My thoughts are triangles, In a circle of my reality, around my square life.
Held together by tired strips of, leather.
I am broken, but somehow I make it work.
Apr 6, 2023
Apr 6, 2023 at 9:31 AM UTC
i don't know whose
firsthand reaction to the sight
of me crawling is worse
that of the man
that asks how i am
as he backtracks
in baby steps
or
those of the rest who
due to oversight
or indifference
are unconsumed
and unconcerned
by and with
futile breaths
nonetheless
but i sure as hell know
the answer
doesn’t matter
so long as i stay sat
writing rhyming rants
to hold my skull’s fracture captive
and perhaps
so i can have it massacred
alongside its inner cats
their joint force task of making contact
with my meek heart also known as
the meager muscle
plasma-mad
in vein
and
collapsed.
- end
Jul 14, 2017
Jul 14, 2017 at 6:37 AM UTC