I feel like drowning in the sea
I don't feel like being found
But no matter how much I try to drown
I float

andrew
the name that haunts me like a ghost
it is because of you
that i live my life closed
to love and potential happiness

i have dreams about many andrews
and they all seem so much better than you
but i will never know because they're just dream boys
that haunt me like you do

it's all fiction
and it makes me wonder
if you were, too.

There are 10 kinds of people in this world,
and binary accounts for them all.

They're happy and sad.
They're ones and zeros.
Villains and heroes.
Villains, yet not all bad.
Despite everything life decides to hurl;
Despite every brick ball of fear
Through the stained glass windows of their minds,
Through it all, they survive.
They're angry and glad.
They're happy and sad.

And in their duality, they're still smiling there
at your sharp hasty words
at your venomous hurt
that you wish so desperately they, too, shared.

pouring my heart out to your email at night –
it just doesn’t feel right
the love, the lust, the tears, the fright
is it really worth my time?
tell me it’s worth being apart
tell me it’s worth being torn apart
by the time and the silence
and all the secrets you keep in your heart.


but even if it’s not worth my time,
nothing you can say will keep me from being by your side.