the moon beamed at you
when you said my name
with your voice, deep and sincere

the stars danced in the night sky
when your eyes, wishful and longing,
held my gaze for a moment that
seemed nothing less than eternity

the world stopped
when your lips curved into a smile
while they were gently touching mine

and the sun never dared to come out
to shatter our dimmed luster
for he knew this was
going to last
forever

What a beautiful morning
to wake up on your side of bed -
now empty of you and your smell.

There was a warning
and I got it misread
now I can’t get out of your spell.

Are you still coming
or are you waiting until I’m dead
to release me from this cell?

I dine alone, love
and the seat across from me
where you’re supposed to be
is empty.

So I dine alone.

I
dine
alone

don’t rush, love
you’ll get there in time
and i’ll be following you
wherever, whenever, however
just don’t
rush

I need to answer the ******* questions tormenting my brain
Stop torturing myself with hope
I know how it’ll go
I know how it’ll go
Dreams don’t mean much in the back of a stinky bus
Dreams die in city lights
I board a train wreck before it happens
Thinking of the
Reaction
Will the boxcar doors free me in a rapid ejection
Will I go to heaven?
Will I make it out west
Or will the train crash somewhere down south
But answer these ******* questions and board
Because we already know
This train will lead to scorn
Another complex
Another regret
Another train wreck
Let’s board

Anorexia
is the most deadly mental disorder
and maybe that is why
I tell myself I am fat,
maybe the reason I cry
when I look in the mirror
is because there is
110 pounds
too much of me
95 pounds
too much of me
80 pounds
too much of me,
I will not be content
until there is no weight left to lose,
until this skin is turned cold
and falls off my body,
I will be
counting the ribs you can see
on my corpse.
I will make myself smaller
and smaller
and smaller
until there is nothing left
to take away.

Close your eyes
and feel nothing but the way the wind caresses your skin;
hear nothing but the breeze that passes by your ears;
see nothing but the oblivion that lies before you

Inhale the vagueness and exhale the clarity
Fill your lungs with the bliss of
having this time to yourself
and let it flow throughout the rest of your body

Be as carefree as you can be for this moment,
this time,
is yours
and nothing and no one can ever
take this away from you
except yourself

Let the wind take you somewhere
you’ve never been to ever in your life
and enjoy the ride

Embrace the reality that
no one can ever tell you
where you are exactly heading off to -
not even the wind who is your most recent friend -
and just simply let it be

Fabricate your own wings,
make your own shoes,
and recognize you can create time
whenever you think there is not enough
of it left for you to spend
or waste

This is your life to live,
your time to take,
your wings to spread off,
your journey to explore

Close your eyes
and savour these things

For they are all yours.

All yours.

All

Yours.