i waited up so many nights hoping i would be lucky enough to get a “hey” from you. he keeps me up too, but it’s because we’ve been talking all day and the conversation still hasn’t come to an end. he keeps me up because talking to him gives me more of a glimpse into paradise than dreaming about you ever could.

sit down, i've got something to say
i just can't seem to love you this way

i know it might come as a shock
but my heart is broken and i've hit rock

bottom

and i don't know how to tell

anyone

but i'm sick of searching for

the one.

bleach blonde beauties
it's all they've ever known

insta versus reality
please take away my phone

i wanna be happier
and i think i could be
if you'd set me free

but it's not your fault
that i lost the key

i can't stand it when
you call me a friend
don't you see, you should be
thinking of me differently

i wish there was a term
for the way your lips feel
when they spell out the words
“i love you”

or something that could capture
the way the clock stops
when you’re the only one i can see
in the room

oh, i’ve searched every dictionary
every thesaurus entry
for “love”
and i’m still looking, but babe
i don’t think i’ll ever find
the words

i stare more than i talk when you're around
and hope that you don't notice
it's not my fault you leave me speechless- i'm just bad with words
it's artless adolescence

when you're gone i miss you bad and i can't cope
i'm stuck here while i wait for you

tell me it's all going to be okay
it's fine to feel this way
tell me you feel it too
and when you're away- too far away
tell me that you miss me too

you've given me the proof i need, but my brain's still a wreck
a roller coaster of cynicism
but there's hope yet, you seem to like it when i'm all choked up
that's failure at it's finest

when you're silent i miss you bad and i can't cope
i'm stuck here while i wait for you

tell me it's all going to be okay
it's fine to feel this way
tell me you feel it too
and when you're away- too far away
tell me that you miss me too

i wish i missed the weekends
but now i'm torn up a day without you here,
staring at the white walls you splattered with green
i wish i missed innocence
being able to fall asleep at night,
but i'm wide awake and i don't hate it.

what happened
to our dreams and hopes as kids
now we're teens
and depression is bliss
aching for a love, or something
to feel like we exist

no amount of friend requests
or followers i get
can replace the hole in my chest
of you not being one of them

no amount of makeup
to cover up my flaws
can make up for the fact
that you’ve already seen my worst

100 unread messages
but left on read
you’re the only one i text
and the only one who doesn’t text me back