Those hairs were spread around that angelic face of hers.
A face that has just left an everlasting impression on my conscience.
A face that has just transformed my ordinary looking roof into a divine ambience.

Those hairs
Sometimes enhancing the aura of my luminous body that illuminates everything so bright.
And
Sometimes blocking the way of my only source of light at night.

When she left
I started staring at the moon
surrounded by the clouds.
I flinched for few seconds & for knowing what I imagined,
I'm leaving all of you for thinking out loud.

I know it's weird but so is our journey until now.
And for all my mistakes I would kneel down before you and bow.

You've been an angel in this relationship and I acted like a devil.
A disturbed soul, a crazy lover, a mystery that has not been unraveled.

I know I told you to go and said so many harsh things.
But believe me I cried too & every day this venomous thorn stings.

I even accept that I didn't behave like this only one time.
But see I have returned to the same place, I came back to you every time.

Because I believe, there's no one in this world whom I have loved so much.
Let's begin a new journey, don't let everything remain as such.

I hereby ask you to forgive me & give me another chance.
Looking at the good time we had, giving it at least a glance.

Let us become two flowers of the same plant and together we would grow.
Or
I'll also accept being the soil beneath your feet & will also accept your NO.

If there is anyone up there,
listening to me and my prayer.

Please pull me out of this situation.
If you created me then I ask you to destroy your creation.

I can't see any path which will lead me to a better life.
And I don't have the strength to hang myself or cut my wrist with a knife.

So, I kneel before you and ask you to do me a favour.
Send a beast on earth and I'll let him to devour.

Because that'll be the only precise punishment for my sin.
I am only giving pain to all my kith and kin.

If there's an afterlife then punish me with a life full of hell.
Trap me there for 1000 years and happily there I'll dwell.

If there's any reincarnation then curse me with a pernicious one,
Devoid of any air, devoid of light of moon or the Sun.

So, if my prayers are reaching you then punish me for my crime.
I give myself away and will fix it only the next time.

The After Effects
After hours of hearing her sweet voice
that drifts me to sleep every night.
Sometimes softly that I shrink in my bed,
occupying a very little space just like
a snail  getting into its shell for sleep.
And sometimes scolding me just like
a mother would do & sends me to sleep
& I would go to sleep like a sincere child
following his mom's command.

After those beautiful hours of my
meditation session,
My favourite soothing music,
My best part of the whole day,
Comes to an end
when the sun rises.
In the morning when I'm already awake.
(I don't wait for this moment to come.)
I now stay awake hoping today.....
today might be the day when she won't leave.

Her first deep breath in the morning,
Followed by an adorable yawn &
stretching of the body just like a cat does.
"Good morning" she whispered.
That's when my day actually starts.
That's when the sun, for me, rises.

I won't say anything(I know that's weird)
But just because I want to stay calm &
listen to those breaths and whispers
one more time which will leave an
everlasting impression on my mind
& I could, somehow, spend the rest of the day,
thinking about her and wait for the night to come.

"Now it's time to go" whispered her voice again.
I feel like a prisoner who was just enjoying
his talk with someone special over phone
but on either side of that glass.
I would give her a sweet kiss & she would
smile(I can see that smile)& say goodbye.
A clickety-clackety sound of her earphones,
Then

Silence!

I could now only hear the noise of my fan.
And
My own heartbeat.

INCEPTION
The time after you've gone to sleep,
Deep sleep,
Is the time when I stay awake for a while.
And "a while" is just for me but in real world terms, you can say a few hours.
I stay awake to witness an extraordinary
phenomenon.
Believe me, Physics can't define this.
Don't know is that some kind of aurora, those northern lights or something beyond it.
But my room, full of darkness, so much that even light couldn't escape.
And in that darkness I see your face.
Your moonlit face.
God! I knew you were an angel..
If you weren't then, why the light from the moon entering through a small hole of my window, falls on nothing but your pretty face.
Enhancing your look, which is the best as it is free from any anxiety.
You have a carefree childlike smile.
My god!!! How can I stop myself....
I want to extend my arms a little to touch those pearly white cheeks of yours.
I want to come a little closer to you and kiss your forehead.
But No!!!!!!!

I stop myself.
How could I touch that divine aura of yours? I am just a normal human being and I believe you aren't.
And then
Then something unexpected happens.
This happens every time..
Every night..
I don't know why happiness is so temporary.
(It would be interesting to see your reaction....)
The brightness of my phone start dimming.....screen time out...
God!!!!
**** imagination!!!

...is the longest ever I've experienced.
It feels like you've gone for decades & you're not coming back.
I could barely carve your picture on
the canvas of my heart but suddenly..
Suddenly, the time comes when you've to leave.
Leaving me alone, longing for you, waiting
for you to come back soon.

It's when I realize how precious you're,
how much I love you & what it feels like
losing you even for a while.
The time when we're talking to each other
flies like a spaceship leaving the earth.
While the time when we don't, elapses like
watching a snail trying to go round the earth.

Sometimes, I wish I could stand against
the hands of clock & would try to stop
seconds, minutes or atleast hours when
we're together.
And when I would succeed, I would live
my whole lofe in that moment watching your beautiful face & forgetting all my anxieties and sorrows.

So, when you're not around, I chant your name like some devotee chanting
mantras & trying to call for his/her god,
longing for his presence.
All I think and talk about is "YOU" during the time
WHEN WE DON'T TALK.

Hidden from the world's eyes,
when you love someone.
There's a bit of excitement every time,
there's so much fun.
When you can't stop talking to each other,
Sometimes in the bathroom and sometimes from the slab of the kitchen.
Talking at night, when she'll be your moonlight
& in the morning you'll be her bright sun.

When there's no fun doing anything else.
While talking to her becomes your only delight.
Being lost in the conversation with her,
you can't even discern between the day and night.
Covering the blanket upto your face,
Hugging your pillow really very tight.
Whispering love into each other's ears,
Knowing you're not alone now and hence feeling everything's alright.


In front of people you act mature but with her you always act silly.
When everyone will know about it and
will interpret unknowingly.
While texting her you'll smile
and everyone will look at you quietly.
Then my dear friend your love is growing.
There's nothing better than loving someone secretly.