silence
it subtly begs
your attention

I still remember it like yesterday
Your warmth
I thought
                   It was only for me
But now I see You with her
       And your warmth on her
Is this cold distant winter
I await my summer
Yet it never came

my father hates me
because I remind him
of my mother,

and he hates that
he fell in love with her
only for it to end
the way that it did.



my mother hates me
because I am
my father's daughter,

and she hates that he
believed there was romance
when all it was to her was
a warm body and a fun night.



my father hates me
because he hates my mother.

my mother hates me
because she hates herself.



my parents never failed
to make me feel unwanted,

but now I realize that
it wasn't about me.

they wanted children.
what they didn't want
was each other.

their hatred for one another
outweighed their love for us.



I know now that
all of that pain was aimed
at each other.

it ricocheted off of
the walls I tried to build
to protect myself,
and it hit us instead.

it hurt me so badly

but I realize now that
it was never my fault.

I write not for you to read
I do it for me to heed
the voice that's within me
yet I still can't guarantee
that when you see what I wrote
I hope for you to praise
for this is to what my heart I devote
yet this is just another phase
of the long life,
I have yet to face

The deptht of my loves flows fluorescently ,
  Like the ocean , I am calm.
   Drink within me! ,
   My soul sails within you.
   Our passion is fluid,
   I am drawn to you,
  Swayed to your caresses
  The gravity Is unformidable ,

They did not clip my wings;

But made me believe that I can't fly.


Questioning my every move;

Never answering my whys.


Telling me my limits;

Darkening my already stormy sky.


Taking all my reasons to live;

And giving me none to die.


Choking on my own tears;

I drown in the ocean I cry.


They did not pull my strings;

But made me their puppet as I can't defy.