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2.2k · Sep 2020
Selda ng Kahapon
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
Ang kalayaang ipinagkait sa akin ng tadhana,  
ang kalayaang gumala na naglaho parang bula.  
Singlayo ng mga tala, hindi maabot,  
nawala dahil sa isang pagkakamali—  
isang pagkakamaling hindi sinasadya.  

Ngunit ang pagkakamaling iyon,  
nauwi sa paulit-ulit na pagkakasala,  
hanggang naging bahagi ng bawat araw.  
Dalawampung taon akong nabuhay  
sa mundong walang tiwala  
mula sa aking mga magulang.  

Ilang beses kong binalikan  
ang mga tanong,  
nagbabakasakaling hanapin ang sagot.  
O, kalungkutan, lubayan mo na ako!  
Naririnig ko ang ulap, umiiyak,  
pumapatak ang luha nito.  

Ang kanilang tingin sa akin—  
isang nilalang na walang halaga,  
isang pagkakamali na kailanman  
ay hindi mababawi.  
Hawak ko ang katotohanan—  
ang katotohanang natatakot akong tanggapin.  
Balang araw, tatawagin akong salot sa lipunan.  
Milyon-milyong mata, tenga, at bibig  
ang naghusga sa akin,  
tila alam ang bawat lihim ng aking pagkatao.  

Sa pagitan ng pag-alis at pagbalik,  
paaralan man o klinika ng espesyalista,  
ang paghihintay ay tila isang habambuhay.  
Limang taon kong idinalangin sa Diyos  
na tupdin ang aking hiling,  
at nangyari nga.  
Ngunit kahit nakakulong ka na,  
hindi ko magawang maging masaya.  
Pagkakamali nating dalawa ito,  
ngunit ikaw lamang ang pinarusahan.  

Ikaw ang naging katahimikan  
sa maingay kong mundo.  
Ngunit nang muli kitang makita,  
sa presinto, harap-harapan,  
tila apoy ang bumalot sa kapaligiran.  
Tanim na poot at galit  
ang bumalot sa aking puso.  

Sa pagtulog ko,  
rinig ko ang tiktak ng relo.  
Minsan, nilaro ako ng panaginip—  
kasama raw kita.  
Gising, natutulala ako,  
nalulunod sa lalim ng iniisip.  

Sa gitna ng pagbalik-tanaw,  
nananatili ako sa kama,  
hinihintay ang sagot  
sa mga tanong ng aking isipan.  
Sapagkat ang buhay,  
tulad ng gulong—  
minsan nasa itaas,  
minsan nasa ibaba.
1.6k · Sep 2020
Nagmamahal, Mahal.
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
Hindi ko mahanap  
ang tamang mga salita  
upang maipahayag sa iyo  
ang nais kong sabihin.  
Ngunit tila panahon na  
upang ilabas ko ang lahat ng hinanakit,  
ang mga pasakit na dinanas ko  
habang nasa piling mo.  
Noong mga panahong  
akin ka pa,  
noong mga araw na magkasama pa tayo,  
at noong mga sandaling  
may “tayo” pang umiiral.  

Hindi ko inasahang magbabago ka,  
na magsasawa ka,  
na iiwan mo ako,  
at ipagpapalit sa kanya.  
Pero ang hindi ko maunawaan,  
bakit mo nasabing ayaw mo na?  
Pagod ka lang ba talaga,  
o napagod ka na  
sa atin, sa sitwasyon,  
sa pagtatago,  
sa mga muntikan na tayong mabuking,  
o sa mga araw na may nakakita sa atin?  
Sino ba talaga ang nagbago—  
ako, ikaw,  
o baka tayo pareho?  

Bakit tila nawalan ka na ng gana?  
Ang mga salita mo’y naging malamig,  
ang mga yakap mo’y unti-unting naglaho,  
at ang dati **** liwanag  
sa mga mata’y nawala.  
Sa gitna ng lahat ng ito,  
ako’y patuloy na lumalaban,  
habang ikaw,  
unti-unting bumitaw.  

Paano mo nagawang balewalain  
ang lahat ng pinagsamahan natin?  
Paano mo natapos  
ang ugnayang binuo natin nang magkasama?  
Ngayon, nauunawaan ko na  
kung bakit mo ako iniwan:  
nakuha mo na ang gusto mo—  
sirain ako,  
iwan ako,  
pagkatapos mo akong pakinabangan.  

Noong araw na hinatid mo ako  
hanggang sa dulo ng kalsada,  
lumingon ako,  
nagbabakasakaling lilingon ka rin,  
tatakbo papunta sa akin,  
yayakapin ako,  
susuyuin ako  
na huwag kang iwan.  
Pero hindi na pala.  
Pinili **** lumayo,  
at sa wakas,  
pinili ko ring  
huwag nang bumalik pa.  

Nararamdaman ko na lang  
ang mga hawak mo—  
tila paalam na,  
ang mga yakap **** nanlalamig,  
ang mga titig **** umiiwas,  
hanggang sa tuluyan kang nawala.  
Ang mga pangako ****  
“mahal kita,”  
“ikaw lang,”  
at “hindi kita iiwan”—  
lahat pala’y kasinungalingan.  

Noong akin ka pa,  
pinanghawakan ko ang mga salitang iyon,  
pero ngayon,  
ang “ikaw at ako”  
ay naging bulong na lamang sa hangin,  
tinatangay ng nakaraan.  

Kung iisa tayo,  
bakit mo nagawang pagkaisahan  
ang damdamin ko?  
Saan ako nagkulang?  
Saan ako nagkamali?  
At bakit mo ako iniwang ganito?  

Oo, bigla kang nawala,  
at nagmukha akong tanga  
kakahanap sa iyo.  
Hanggang sa makita kita,  
nasa piling na pala ng iba.  
Sobrang saya mo sa kanya,  
ibang-iba sa tuwing ikaw ay kasama ko noon.  

Pinilit kong lumayo,  
kahit alam kong mahirap.  
Pinalaya kita,  
kahit hindi ko kaya.  
Ginawa ko ito para  
sa kapayapaan nating dalawa.  

Hindi na kita hahabulin.  
Tanggap ko na—  
matagal na tayong wala.  
Ibabaon ko sa limot  
ang lahat ng sakit,  
ang lahat ng alaala,  
at ang lahat ng naging tayo.  

Paalam,  
nagmamahal pa rin,  
Mahal.
948 · Apr 2021
IKAW
yndnmncnll Apr 2021
Kulang ang mga bituin sa kalangitan
Dahil kung wala ka ay kulang rin ako
Ikaw ang nagsisilbing aking ilaw sa aking madilim na landas na tinatahak
Ikaw ang nagsisilbing katahimikan
Sa aking maingay at magulong mundo
alam kong masamang gawing mundo ang alam kong tao lang
Huwag mo naman sanang nila-Lang ang isang katulad kong nilalang
pero hindi payapa ang aking mundo kung wala ka
Ikaw at pangalan mo ay sa aking puso't isipan nakatatak
Mahal, ikaw ang aking pahinga, ang aking payapa
Sa mga panahong ako ay pagod at gustong mapag-isa
Ikaw ang aking kasiyahan sa mga araw na ako ay nalulumbay
At ikaw lamang ang aking mamahalin habangbuhay
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
Take me to Wonderland
Leave me in Neverland
Hold my hand
And come with me where dreams are born
And time is never planned
So come with me where you and I are born
And our future is long planned.

We could be mad whenever we want,
Laughing together as we climb vines that seem to go on and on,
Tea parties popping up around every corner,
Where cups refill themselves, and teapots seem to burn with laughter.

We could dance with the Cheshire Cat,
Chasing the shadows and laughing until we’re breathless,
Where rules don’t matter, and everything feels a little off,
But it’s the kind of "off" that makes you feel truly alive.

We could sip tea anytime we please,
Pouring it from cups that never seem to empty,
Sipping away the hours with the White Rabbit, who’s always running late,
While the Mad Hatter’s mad plans unfold around us.

The flowers would talk, and the trees might sing,
The Queen could shout, “Off with their heads!” in her royal way,
But none of it would matter, because here in this world,
Every oddity and every strange moment just fit.

In Wonderland, we’d be free—no worries, no limits,
Living in the madness, where hearts are light and unburdened.
And even when we leave, we’ll remember,
That in Wonderland, joy is something that never stops flowing.

In Neverland, we’ll never grow old,
Where stories of Peter Pan are forever told.
We’ll fly through the skies, carefree and bright,
With Tinker Bell’s sparkles lighting up the night.

We’ll join Peter on adventures untamed,
Wendy’s courage, never to be shamed,
The Lost Boys will laugh and play all day,
As we chase the pirates, keeping fear at bay.

With the fairy dust swirling all around,
We’ll leap and soar without a sound.
No worries, no age, no reason to flee,
In Neverland, we’re wild and free.

We’ll meet Captain Hook, with his pirate crew,
And battle them all, with hearts so true.
We’ll swim in the lagoons, and sail the skies,
Where the stars never fade, and the moon never dies.

Tinker Bell’s wings will guide us through,
With her light, we’ll always know what to do.
And Wendy, with her gentle heart so kind,
Will remind us that adventure is always in our mind.

In Neverland, we’ll live without fear,
Where each moment’s magic is crystal clear.
Together, forever, we’ll laugh and play,
In Neverland, time slips away.

My Wonderland is your Neverland,
We will be forever together, hand in hand.
The same goes for you, and you are for me,
In this endless world, we’re meant to be.

Through the looking glass, we’ll chase our dreams,
In realms where nothing is quite as it seems.
Where time doesn’t pass, and love knows no end,
You are my forever, my love, my friend.

In your Neverland, we’ll never grow old,
Where every moment is a story untold.
I’ll be your Wendy, you’ll be my Peter Pan,
Together, we’ll conquer the skies and the land.

In my Wonderland, we’ll dance in the dark,
Laugh and twirl, leaving our mark.
With the Mad Hatter and Cheshire by our side,
Our hearts forever, nothing to hide.

We’ll explore the unknown, both near and far,
Our love will be our guiding star.
In Wonderland, in Neverland, we’ll be free,
For we are meant for each other, you and me.
432 · Aug 2023
Alam ko (11-11-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Alam kong hindi ang pangalan ko
Ang unang tatawagin mo
Ang unang bibigkasin mo
Ang maaalala mo

Alam kong hindi ang pangalan ko
Ang unang papasok sa isip mo
Ang unang maiisip mo
Sa tuwing naririnig mo ito

Alam kong hindi rin ang pangalan ko
Ang lagi **** bukambibig sa mga kaibigan mo
Hindi rin ako ang laman ng mga kwento mo
Ang una **** matakbuhan sa tuwing may problema ka

Mas lalong hindi ako ang hanap-hanap ng mga mata mo
Ang kinabbabaliwan mo
Ang magiging kabiyak mo sa tamang panahon
Hindi lang ako naglakas ng loob na sabihin sa iyo noon

Ang una **** tatawagan sa tuwing nag-iisa ka
Alam kong hindi ang text o tawag ko ang una **** sasagutin
Hindi rin ito ang laging inaabangan mo
Alam kong kung paano mo ako tingnan ay iba

Iba kung paano mo siya tingnan
Iba kung paano mo siya mahalin
Kung paano mo siya alagaan
Alam kong hindi ako ang mundo mo

Ang unang iikot at tatakbo sa isipan mo araw-araw
Alam kong hindi ako ang iniisip mo araw-araw
Alam kong kaibigan lang ang tingin mo sa akin
Alam kong parang kapatid lang ang pagtrato mo sa akin

Alam kong hindi ang kamay ko ang unang hahawakan mo
Alam kong hindi ako ang unang lalapitan mo
At unang hahanapin mo pagkadilat ng mga mata mo
Alam kong hindi ako ang unang yayakapin mo

Alam kong hindi ako ang unang liligawan mo
Alam kong hindi ako, Oo
Noong una pa lang alam ko na
Na hindi ako ang tinitibok ng puso mo

Ang iyong unang sinisinta
Alam ko noong una pa lang
Tinatak ko na sa isipan ko
Na wala akong puwang ni minsan man diyan sa puso mo

Alam kong ang bawat pagtingin mo sa akin
Ay iba sa kung paano mo siya tingnan
Kung paano mo siya kausapin
Kung paano ka magmalasakit sa kanya

Kung paano mo siya tratuhin
Ni minsan hindi ko inisip o hiniling
Na ibalik mo sa akin ang pagmamahal na ipinaramdam ko sa'yo
Ni minsan hindi ako nagdalawang isip na katukin yang puso mo

Baka sakali lang matanggap at mahalin mo rin ako
Baka sakali maisip mo rin na bigyan ako ng pagkakataon
Ni minsan hindi ako humingi ng kahit anong kapalit
Ni minsan hindi ko inisip na habulin ka

Na lumuhod sa harap mo at magmakaawa
Dasal lang ang kakampi ko
Na sana huwag kang magmahal ng iba
Na sana walang ibang naghihintay sa’yo

Na sana ako na lang ang mamahalin mo
Na sana dinggin na ng Panginoon ang hiling ko
Alam ko na hindi ako ang gusto mo
Noong una pa lang alam ko na

Kahit hindi mo sabihin
Ramdam ko naman
Ang mga panlalamig na trato mo sa akin
Ang pagbabalewala mo sa akin

Alam kong kahit kailan wala akong laban sa kanya
Kahit kailan hindi kita magawang pilitin
Ayaw kong ipilit sa iyo na ako ang piliin
Dahil alam kong siya ang gusto mo

Alam kong hindi para sa akin ang mga ngiti mo
Alam kong hindi ako ang gustong makausap mo
Alam kong hindi ako ang gusto **** makasama
Ang gusto **** makita kang tumawa.

Kahit kailan hindi ako magiging siya
Kahit kailan hindi ko kayang palitan siya
Diyan sa puso mo
Kahit kailan hindi ko magawang turuan ang puso mo

Na ako ang mahalin mo
Na ako ang pipiliin mo
Kahit kailan hindi ako ang nakikita mo
Sa tuwing magkasama tayo

Hiniling mo na sana siya na lang ang kasama mo
Na sana siya na lang ang nakausap mo
At ang nakakaintindi at nakikinig sa’yo
Kailanman magkaiba kami

At kahit bali-baliktarin man natin ang mundo
Kahit ikumpara mo man ako
Hindi siya magiging ako
At hindi rin ako magiging siya.
388 · Mar 2021
Breakup lyrical poetry
yndnmncnll Mar 2021
Yung di mo pa naririnig ang mga kataga
Ngunit ramdam na ng puso **** wala na talaga
Kayat huwag na nating ipilit pa
Dahil mas lalo lang tayong masasaktan
Pagkatapos mo siyang mahalin ay iniwan ka niyang luhaan

Kaya’t wag ka nang umasa pa
Na babalikan ka pa niya
Dahil kung talagang mahal ka niya
Di ka sana ngayon nag-iisa

Hindi ikaw ang may mali kundi sila
Nagmahal ka lang naman ng tapat
Pero bakit ka nila iniwang nag-iisa
Kahit ibigay mo pa lahat
Kung iiwan ka, iiwan ka talaga
Kung manloloko yan, magloloko yan
Kung sabi niyang mahal ka niya
Bakit ka niya sinasaktan ng ganyan?

Siguro may rason kung bakit tayo umabot sa ganito
Kung bakit nagwakas ang pagsasama nating dalawa
Ngayon ang puso ay nalilito
Kaya’t wag nang umasa pa
Na balang araw ay babalikan ka niya
Dahil kung talagang mahal ka niyan
Hindi ka niya iiwan nang luhaan

Hindi ikaw ang may mali kundi sila
Nagmahal ka lang naman ng tapat
Pero bakit ka nila iniwang nag-iisa
Kahit ibigay mo pa lahat
Kung iiwan ka, iiwan ka talaga
Kung manloloko yan, magloloko yan
Kung sabi niyang mahal ka niya
Bakit ka niya sinasaktan ng ganyan?


Walang magagawa kundi gustong ibalik lahat sa dati
Kaya’t inuungkat ang mga pangyayari
Ngunit ang alaala’y babalik pa
Kaso ang mga taong naging parte nito ay hindi na

Hindi ikaw ang may mali kundi sila
Nagmahal ka lang naman ng tapat
Pero bakit ka nila iniwang nag-iisa
Kahit ibigay mo pa lahat

Kung iiwan ka, iiwan ka talaga
Kung manloloko yan, magloloko yan
Kung sabi niyang mahal ka niya
Bakit ka niya sinasaktan ng ganyan?
314 · Jan 2021
Pag-Ibig
yndnmncnll Jan 2021
Isang salita, pitong letra
PAG-IBIG na mas mahirap pa sa Math Equation
PAG-IBIG na mas kumplikado pa sa Logical Reasoning
PAG-IBIG na mas mahirap sagutin kahit OO o HINDI lang ang isasagot
Ang utak kong ito na kahit ilang beses kong pigain ay hindi kayang sumagot

Na  kahit naipapakita ko na sa'yo na ikaw ay deserving
Ngunit di mo pansin ang aking naibibigay na effort and attention

Oh well, singtamis ng kendi ang salitang I LOVE YOU
Ngunit di mo feel ang aking love towards you
I have been praying that I hope you feel the same way too
Pero di ko pa alam kung kailan ito magkakatotoo
281 · Aug 2023
The man I loved (7-20-23)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I will tell the whole world about him
He feels like singing endless hymns
He has been so good to me
He is all I ever wanna see

He has sparkling madness, brown eyes
As if time flies
He was anxious and traumatized, like his dark unforgettable past
He wishes it never last

In the back of his mind
Why was he left behind?
He sings ballads and praises
All his days, he never fazes

He was rejected by many
Since others’ motives are too shady
Out of all the people, only one girl favors you
She is the only one simping you

Loving him is too crucial to hate
Seems like having him is really my fate
I admit it, he is the man she loves
He was indeed God’s gift from up above
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Singkislap ng mga tala ang iyong mga mata
Sa tuwing ikaw ay nakatingin sa akin
Sa tuwing tayo ay magkasama
Anong saya aking nadarama

Di ko maipaliwanag
Sadyang aking mundo’y lumiliwanag
Ibubulong ko na lamang sa hangin
Ang aking nararamdaman na hindi ko maamin

Aking mahal, sana ay ikaw na nga
Ang aking makakasama hanggang sa pagtanda
Sana ay ako lamang ang iyong mamahalin
Ikaw lamang ang aking mahal

Ikaw lamang ang aking minamahal
At ikaw lamang ang aking mamahalin
Ikaw lamang ang aking mahal, minamahal at mamahalin, sinta
At wala nang iba pa

Hindi man kita kasama araw man o gabi
Walang ibang papalit sa’yo dito sa puso ko
Ikaw lamang ang aking gustong makatabi
At sa iyo lamang umiikot aking mundo

Saksi ang Panginoon sa ating pagmamahalan
Dahil alam niyang sa iyo ako nakalaan
Ito ang iyong pakatatandaan
Na kahit ako ay magkamali man, pangakong hindi kita sasaktan

Singdami nang mga tala ang mga taon
Na gustong tayo ang magkasama hanggang sa huli
Kahit na tayo man ay magkalayo ngayon
Alam kong makakasama’t mahahagkan kitang muli

Sana ay pagbigyan ng panahon
Kahit sa gabi lamang ikaw ay makatabi

Ikaw lamang ang aking mahal
Mula noon hanggang ngayon
Ikaw lamang ang aking minamahal
Mula noon hanggang ngayon

Ikaw lamang ang aking mahal
Ang aking minamahal
At aking pipiliing mamahalin
Sana ay ako rin
253 · Aug 2023
6-13-22 (10-10-22)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Ikaw ang simula at ang wakas
Panahon man ay lumipas
Sa iyong yakap ako’y walang takas
Aking pag-ibig sa iyo ay wagas

Ang ating pagmamahalan sa isa’t isa
Lumiliwanag nang parang mga tala
Hindi ko ninanais na ikaw ay magtaka
Huwag ka nang mag-abala pa

Ikaw ang kinang sa ‘king mga mata
Ikaw at ako’y iisa
Ikaw ang laman ng bawat pahina
Ang pamagat sa aking tula

Ang musika sa aking kanta
Kung ang pag-ibig ko sa iyo, sinta
Ay magiging isang sumpa
Habangbuhay akong manunumba sa dambana

Ayokong lumayo sa’yo
Ikakalungkot ng puso ko
Ika'y aking naging mundo
Sa iyo, mahal ay ako'y natutuliro

Hawakan mo lamang ang aking kamay
Ikaw lamang ang aking pipiliin sa habangbuhay
Ang aking minahal ng tunay
Ang makamit ka ay isang tagumpay

Ikaw ang aking biyaya
Ang dumating nang kusa
Ikaw ay mahalaga
Huwag kang mag-alala

Ikaw ay minamahal kong talaga
Ang aking puso'y sa iyo mas sumasaya
Ikaw ang aking dinalangin sa Poong Maykapal
Ang hinintay ko nang kaytagal
251 · 7d
awts gege.
There are stories too painful to turn into poems.  
Sometimes, they remain just stories,  
until they become mere memories  
and are gradually forgotten.
peyn.
189 · May 2021
Paalam
yndnmncnll May 2021
Isang bukas na sulat para sa aking minamahal:

Hindi ka niya kayang palitan
Pero kaya niyang higitan ang pagmamahal mo
Pero kaya niyang punan ang mga pagkukulang mo
Binibigay at pinaparamdam niya sa akin ang mga bagay na gusto kong sa'yo galing
Ang ngiti mo, ang pangalan mo, ang tawa mo, ang hugis ng mukha mo di ko malimutan kailanman
Ngunit siya na ang nandiyan para sa akin
Na kailanman ay hindi na ako sa iyo ay babalik pa
182 · Aug 2023
Sinisinta (11-8-2022)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Lumalalim na ang gabi
Malamig ang simoy ng hangin
Ikaw lamang ang nais kong makatabi
At ang aking gustong makapiling
Oh, paligaw-ligaw tingin
Ikaw lamang ang tanging minimithi

Ayoko munang umuwi
Dito ka muna sa aking tabi
Ayoko nang sa iyo ay mawalay pa
Huwag mo na akong iwan pa

Huwag muna tayong umuwi
Kay sarap pagmasdan ng buwan ngayong gabi
Hawak ang iyong kamay at lasap ang preskong hangin
Ngayo'y nadinig na aking panalangin

Kay sarap pagmasdan ng mga tala
Singkislap ng iyong mga mata
Hawakan mo lamang ang aking kamay
At tayo ay nakatingala sa alapaap
Ikaw lamang ang aking sinisinta, aking pinapangarap
Ang aking minahal ng tunay

Sapagkat hanap ng puso ko'y ikaw
At wala nang iba pa
Dahil mahal kang talaga
Ibubuhos lahat ng pagmamahal at oras sa iyo
Habang ako ay nandito pa sa mundong ibabaw
Ako ay nangungulila sa tuwing tayo ay magkalayo

Sa iyo lamang ako uuwi
Sa iyo lamang ako mananatili
Ikaw lamang ang aking nag-iisang, sinisinta
181 · Sep 2023
Better luck next time
yndnmncnll Sep 2023
There is no more next time for me
For you and me, I thought we would be
More than what we imagine or see
But we used to be the life of the party

There's no more words to rhyme, to say
But you pushed me away
It washed me away out to sea
In us, there is no more we
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Mananatili akong sa’yo hanggang dulo
Kung hindi man maging tayo,
Hanggang sa huli
Kahit ang Panginoon, ang mga tala at buwan sa kalangitan ang saksi;

At hindi ko kailanman maikubli
Kung ano ang nararamdaman ko para sa’yo.

Mananatili akong sa’yo, sa mga oras na kailangan mo ako
Sa mga araw na wala kang masasandalan
Ako ang kanlungan mo
Ang iyong maaasahan

Mananatili sa iyong tabi
Kahit sa mga gabing hindi ka mapakali,
Sa’yo lang ako naging sigurado
Sa’yo lang ako naging kuntento,

Mananatiling sa’yo
Sa’yo hanggang dulo;

Pero hindi payapa ang aking mundo kung wala ka
Mahal, ikaw ang aking pahinga, ang aking payapa,
Sa mga panahong ako ay pagod at gustong mapag-isa
Sa iyong piling, ikaw ang aking tahanan

Ikaw ang aking magpakailanman
Ang aking tahanan
Ang aking masasandalan
Ikaw at ako’y nasa kanluran

Ang iyong mga kamay ang aking gustong hawakan
Ang iyong tinig ang aking gustong marinig
Ikaw ang aking kasiyahan sa mga araw na ako ay nalulumbay;
At ikaw lamang ang aking mamahalin habangbuhay.

Hindi kita papalitan
Hindi kita bibitiwan,
Hindi kita susukuan
Mananatili akong sa’yo,

Hindi kita iiwan
Dahil ikaw ang aking ligaya,
Ikaw lamang ang nag-iisa
Mananatili akong sa’yo.

Huwag kang mag-alala
Hindi ako mawawala;
Sasamahan kita kahit saan man tayo mapunta
Basta’t ikaw ang aking kasama.

Ikaw ang natatangi
Ang kailanman na hindi ko kayang itanggi,
Ikaw at ako’y isinulat sa mga bituin sa kalangitan
At dahil sa ating wagas na pagmamahalan;

Hindi kita ikakahiya
Ipagsisigawan sa buong mundo
Kung gaano kita kamahal sinta
At dahil ang puso ko’y sa’yo.
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Kulang ang mga bituin sa kalangitan
Na kahit minsan ay kay sarap pagmasdan
Kung mawawala ka man ay kulang rin ako,
Ikaw ang nagsisilbing aking katahimikan

Sa aking maingay at magulong mundo,
Para kang isang tanawin
Na kay sarap titigan
Sana nga ay makuha ka sa tingin,

Tayo ay may walong planeta
Ngunit sa iyo lamang umiikot ang mundo ko
Ikaw ang aking paboritong pantasya
Na ayaw kong kalimutan

Ikaw ang paborito kong panaginip
Na kahit minsan sana ay hindi na ako magising
Makasama ka lamang kahit ako’y naka idlip
Pero ayaw kong mabuking

Na ang talino ko sa klase
Pero pagdating sa’yo nabo-bobo at nata-tanga ako
Alam kong wala kang pake
Dahil bihira naman na ako ay magugustuhan mo

Ang isang tulad ko
Nakakasagot naman ako sa oral namin
Pero pagdating sa’yo nata-tameme ako at ‘di maka-amin
Dahil suntok sa buwan lamang ako pagdating sa’yo

Ka-babae kong tao
Pero kapag ikaw nababakla ako
Hindi ko alam bakit nagkakaganito ako
Pagdating sa iyo nagiging abnormal ako

Ikaw ang ilaw
Sa madilim na landas na aking tinatahak;
Ikaw at ang pangalan mo ay sa aking puso't isipan nakatatak
Wala kang ibang kaagaw
151 · Aug 2023
Aking sinta (11-01-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Sa gilid ng aking mga mata
Hinahayaan kitang pagmasdan
Para kang mga tala sa kalangitan
Na lumiliwanag gaya ng iyong mga mata

Wala na palang saysay ang aking pagtingin
Kung hindi naman ako ang hinahanap mo
Kung hindi pala ako ang pinapangarap mo
Mahirap man kasing aminin

Ang matagal ko nang gustong sabihin
Na ikaw lamang ang aking minimithi
Ang aking hinihiling
Puwede bang ako na lang

Tayo na lang
Ako na lang ang piliin mo
Tayo nalang ang magsama
Tayo na lang ang magmahalan, aking sinta

Oh, hindi ko maitanggi
Na ako sa iyo ay may lihim na pagtingin
Kusa kitang hiniling
Sana nga ay ako na ang gusto **** makasama

Mahal na mahal kita
Hindi kita iiwanan
Hindi papabayaan, lagi kang iingatan
Aalagaan, Oh aking sinta
134 · Aug 2023
LAGING IKAW (3-19-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Puso ko’y umaapaw sa tuwa
Sa tuwing ikaw ang kausap buong magdamag
Na para bang sa bawat minuto ako ay napapalundag
Dahil sa ako ay iyong napasaya

Kaya’t sana ay huwag kang magbago
Huwag kang mag-alala nandito lang ako
Naghihitay palagi para sa’yo
Kaya’t walang susuko

Laging ikaw ang nasa isip
Ang nasa aking panaginip
Laging ang pangalan mo
Ang sigaw ng aking puso

Laging ikaw ang gustong hanap ng aking mga mata
Pagkadilat ko pa lang sa umaga
Laging ikaw lamang ang gustong makatabi
Mapa-umaga man hanggang gabi

Laging ikaw lamang ang magmamay-ari ng aking puso
Pangako, mananatili akong sa’yo
Basta’t laging ikaw lamang
Laging ikaw lamang

Malayo man tayo sa isa’t-isa
Hindi man tayo laging magkasama
Basta’t iyong tatandaan
Ang puso ko’y sa iyo lamang nakalaan

Pangako, mananatili tayong buo
Hanggang sa dulo
At kahit saan man mapunta
Ako’y ‘di na kailangan mangamba

Sa iyo lamang akong talaga
Laging ikaw ang nasa aking isip
Laging ikaw ang nasa aking panaginip
Ang puso ko’y sa’yo lang talaga
120 · Mar 2021
This girl
yndnmncnll Mar 2021
This girl is rare, This girl is one of a kind
This girl only has you on her mind
This girl is still under your care
Oh, but this girl is hurt
And has no more time to flirt

This girl’s already all alone
She’s no longer in your zone
This girl has already cried enough
But this girl’s heart’s too tough

This girl no longer owns you
This girl is no longer your priority
This girl’s decision is never made easy
This girl will never listen to your lies anymore
Cause this girl can’t hold it any longer
This girl still loves you so
But you see, this girl has to let you go

This girl no longer believes in you
This girl no longer misses you
This girl no longer trusts you
This girl is no longer coming back to you
This girl already gave you the freedom you deserve
This girl has a lot to observe

From your words of wisdom to lies
She can’t see it in your eyes
But she feels it inside her
You never deserve to keep her

This girl loves you more than you ever know
She’s just too shy to let it show
But she needs to love herself first
This girl already found you
But you let her go
She chose you for a reason
But this love is already not it’s season
But she needs to find herself first
This girl misses you like crazy
But she misses herself more every day
This girl gave time to you
But she needs to spare herself some time

This girl already forgave you
And hopes to forget what has been said and done
This girl  will still treat you as her only one
But she needs to give you the freedom you deserve
I hope one day we meet again
Where this pain no longer remained
I hope you find the happiness you deserve

One day, this girl will look at you
Like I no longer have feelings for you
One day, I will find time to see you
But I’m no longer coming back to you.
119 · Aug 15
pain.
yndnmncnll Aug 15
You don't have to rub salt in my wounds
Say it to my face
Stand my feet on the ground
Leave my place without a trace

Move on, forget them
Condemn them, or be solemn
For they only gave me misery
Instead of love and mercy

I came back but ran away afterwards
Feeling scared, like the deer in the headlights
I see flashing signs, but it was what I thought it was
But isn't she lovely
Isn't she pretty

What does a pretty girl like you feel
Oh behind that pretty smile, hides the darkest secrets I was afraid to tell
Oh no one wants to know
But I'm too intrigued to show
Hey, I know, I thought it will only take me a while
I felt like I'm dying inside

Mask my pain, only anger remains
Leave thy past behind, they've been blind
But too foolish to mind
Mind games play thy minds
One wants to turn a blind eye, and a numb death
Makes me bleed, make them repent
Hollows are deadly, poison ivy
110 · Jan 2021
Prison of Hell
yndnmncnll Jan 2021
Trying to free me from the chains that they cuffed around my neck, feet and hands
Trying to free me from the pain that I could never understand
Here I am imprisoned in the distress of my past
And burning my soul in hell
But how long will the pain last ?
Unless you wish me well.
103 · Mar 2021
tired.
yndnmncnll Mar 2021
Loving someone who has no time for you? Wow. How incredible.
102 · Mar 2021
My Suicide Note
yndnmncnll Mar 2021
Prison of Hell
Try to free from the chains,
Cuffed around my neck,
Bound are my feet and hands.
Trying to free myself,
How long will I last?
This indicipherable torture,
Imprisoned by my past.
How long will this pain last?
Burn my soul,
With this addicting ache I lust,
Shackled by the ticking sand–
But how long will I truly last?
Unless you wish me well,
Bound are my feet and hands,
Carpe Diem,
Save me lest I end, by my two hand.
100 · Aug 2023
Babalik-balikan (6-29-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Hihiwalayan, babalikan
Bibitawan, Hahabulin
Hihilingin ka ulit na mapasa’kin
Hihintayin ka ulit na babalik sa akin

Hihintayin, Papatawarin
Tatanggapin, Mamahalin sa uulitin
Wag kang mag-alala
Huwag kang mangamba

Ikaw ay tatanggapin pa rin
Ang aking paulit-ulit na hihilingin
Kahit na isang saglit
Kahit na masakit

Dahil ikaw pa rin ay aking mahal
Kahit gaano man ka-tagal
Hihintayin kitang bumalik
Sa iyo pa rin ako ay nananabik

Ikaw pa rin ang babalik-balikan
Oh, ang aking babalik-balikan

Naghihintay sa wala
Umaasa pa rin sa wala
Di alam kung may pag-asa pa
Kung kailan mo ako babalikan

Ako ang naghabol kahit hindi naman ako Ang nang-iwan
Basta’t alam ko
Na hindi ako ang lugi sa dulo

At least hindi ako naging sakit sa ulo
Binigay ko man lahat
Kulang man o sapat
Sa aking piling naman ay
Nakita kitang sumaya

Bakit kinailangan pa na maghiwalay ?
Sana nga ay bumalik ka na

Naging masaya naman ako nang wala ka na
Nabuo ko naman sarili ko
Ng wala ang tulong mo
Pagkat mayroong puwang dito sa puso ko

Na ikaw lamang ang makaka-puna
Dahil ikaw lang langga ay sapat na

Nagbago man ang lahat sa akin
Ngunit ang nararamdaman ko sa’yo
Ay mananatili at hindi magbabago kailanman
Hindi ko na kailangang sabihin:

Na babalikan mo ako o huwag na
Basta’t hindi kita susukuan
94 · Aug 2023
Philautia. (11-20-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Strolling all alone in the sidewalks
Been too busy and too tired to talk
Oh, I am taking all the time
All alone but ain’t lonely

Oh, I am alone all the time
But I ain’t lonely
Hey, I was doing really just fine
Yes, I will be fine

I am taking all the self-worth I deserve
Feed me the love I deserve
I am satisfying myself with the self-love I deserve
Yeah, I deserve so much more than what I truly deserve

Been alone in the seaside now
Too many things going around my mind
I have been so busy now
I got to let myself find me

Know what else will be behind me
Know what I got to find
And oh, I have been managing my own time
The way you never reciprocate the time

I want to have
I got to have
I deserve to have
Oh, I am all that I have

Walking by the seaside aisle
Seeing the beach in a different perspective
Let us be lost in our way
And discover the world we live in

You got to give in
Walking that extra mile
Reaching the borderline
Life seems too obstructive

I got to say
I was alone but ain’t lonely
Say that I was lonely before but I was with you
What would be the difference?

I just want to be alone
At least I feel less lonely
There seems to be an occurrence
It was different when I was with you
93 · Sep 2020
feeling sick
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
Water alone cannot suffice my hunger
Food alone cannot withstand my thirst
I was drowning in fear and running for my life
I feel like lying in deathbed all my life
91 · Sep 2020
Feeling like hell
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
He made me realize that I was living in a house filled with demons
Their bad habits are quite common
If you could compare it with anything else
I only want nothing more, nothing less
They are quite cruel
They only wanted to conquer and rule
Conquer and rule the world and own it like it's theirs
But they aren't the heirs.

I have a mother whose like Beelzebub
I have a father whose like Beelzebul
I have a sister-in-law whose like Lucifer
While my siblings were the accuser.

How I wonder, my home no longer has love in it
How can I feel it?
My heart is already numb
And my mind is super dumb.
How can I call it my home
If I feel hopeless and alone,
Where shall I locate my house?
Well, Hell is already my house.
No wonder, I have been feeling like hell
Every time you try to wish me well.
89 · Aug 2023
INSOMNIA (7-6-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Hindi makatulog sa wastong oras
Hindi rin makakain sa saktong oras
Laging walang gana
Tanging ikaw na lamang ang natitrang pag-asa

Upang manumbalik sa dating sigla
Ang babaeng minahal ka ng sobra
Ngunit pinili **** iwanan siya
Sinaktan at pinaluha mo siya

Ang babaeng tulad niya ay walang ibang ginawa
Kundi intindihin at pakinggan ka
Ngayon hindi mo magawa iyong hinihiling niya
Sapat na sa kanya na makita kang masaya

Ngunit siya kaya niyang gawin lahat
Kaya niyang tiisin yung sakit
Minahal ka niya ng tapat
Ngunit ang iyong isinukli ay walang iba kundi sakit

Ngayon, iiyak siya ng biglaan
At ikaw ang tanging dahilan
Gigising siya ng alas tres ng umaga
Upang tanungin sa sarili niya

Bakit mo ba siya iniwan?
Dahil hindi niya ito dapat ngayon nararamdaman
Kahit masakit tinuturuan ko ang sarili ko
Na kalimutan kita kahit hindi ko kaya

Darating rin ang tamang tao
Na sa akin ay nakatadhana
84 · Aug 2023
Better (04-02-22)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Baby, you deserve a love that stays
Deserve a girl that stays
Not that kind of love that comes back
That makes you distract

You deserve a love that remains
A love that gives inner peace but not hurt and pain
You deserve a love that never leaves
And a heart and mind that never deceives

Baby you deserve better
I don’t want to see you with someone better
That’s why I wanna be better
Better, better, better for you
Oh, better, better, better for you

Baby, come here
I will kiss it better
I just want to be with you forever
I want us to be together

I just wanna be better
Better, better, better for you
Oh, Promise I’ll be better
Better, better, better for you

You deserve to be loved
You are more than enough
You deserve a love that lasts a lifetime
Babe, you are the best thing that has ever been mine

No wonder why everyone leaves you
I don’t know what’s their problem
But let me stay here with you
Until we will make it an official

This love is not artificial
This love is like an emblem
I just wanna treasure you forever
I will give up everything so we could be together

Cause baby, you deserve a love that stays
You deserve a love that never goes away
No ghosting, no clout chasing

Just love, pure love
No pressure, not a leisure
No need to rush, if this feeling is just a crush
You deserve a love that remains

A love that stays and never goes away
A love that never demands pain
A love that is not forced usually

It is not a fleeting feeling
This feeling made me feel like I’m on the ceiling
This love made me feel crazy
I’m going crazy, I want to be your lady
76 · Sep 2020
Far Away </3
yndnmncnll Sep 2020
I'm letting you go
I'm setting you free,
It's not you because it's me
I love you but this is goodbye;
I just want to let you know
I love you goodbye.

I never stopped loving you
It was you who chose to walk away,
I never stopped aporoaching you
It was you who went away;

I am so confused
Our set-up was so infused
That's why bridges should be burned
And tables should have turned

I am way too good for you
You are no good for me
You will just take me for granted
And then leave me unattended

Do I have to notice you first and aporoach you
Just to let you know that I will be here for you
But I won't be that girl any longer
Who would stay by your side forever

That's why I need to let go of your hand
I hope you understand
As i walk far away, I hope you close your eyes
And wipe away the tears falling from your eyes.
74 · Oct 2020
Blessing in disguise
yndnmncnll Oct 2020
One-sided love, he ain't my first love
I'm the devilish one, he's the angelic one
We're different yet the same
Every time he calls out my name.

It must be bad karma
What I did to every one,
That's why I'm all alone
But I ain't lonely,
I'm super happy
I guess this is good karma,
I bet he's my blessing in disguise
And maybe he's the angel in the skies.

I've got no horns
I ain't crowned with thorns
I've got no halo
Maybe I'll just say hello

I've got no wooden staff
I ain't worshipping a golden calf
I had no wings for me to fly
But I'm pretty sure I'm happy enough to cry

I can't part the sea
I can't reach the shore
I can't cross the ocean and walk on the water
I can't perform miracles.

I hope you would see
That I ain't like this before
I drifted like the wind after
It was then told in the oracle.
71 · Aug 2023
21.24 (11-13-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Age does not matter
Inner beauty does matter
Outer beauty does not
Personality matters most

I love the way you touch my hand
I know it is your command
Love me more than I deserve
Cause I will love you more than what you deserve.
70 · Aug 2023
My moon (7-28-23)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
The sky is breathtakin’
I feel like stargazin’
Capturing moments of you
Observing every move of you

Looking at your smile
While relaxing in the isle
I got this kind of healthy love
No one could ever get enough

When tough times arise
Like waves they fall or rise
Just know that I will always be here for you
I will always love you in all shades of you

I still want you
I still love you even if you hurt me
I still want you even if you are mean to me
Nobody’s perfect and we aren’t perfect, love
68 · Aug 2023
PALANGGA (2-12-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Look at me, stare into my eyes and never look away
Hold my hand and hug me close
Then hear what I have to say
Love, it’s you I couldn’t bear to lose

I've been waiting for a long time
To be somebody's prayer
I have looked everywhere for a long time
But here you are now and you have answered my prayer

I can't find the right words to say:
How grateful I am of having you
You are God’s blessing and a living gift to me
To have someone like you

Through our ups and downs, you have loved me
And I am glad that you chose to stay

Some people search their whole lives to find what I found in you
And nothing's ever going to change the way I feel for you
Cause you gave me feelings I cannot put into words
But as they say action speaks louder than words

Cause a glimpse of you is all I ever yearned
I know your love is earned
But thank you, for making me feel loved
Because for me, you are enough to be loved

I still love you
I still miss you
I still want you
I still need you

Love me and look into my eyes
Cause love, you made me crazier all the time
Touch me now as I close my eyes
Cause I miss you all the time

You made me choose
Don't worry, cause you're the one I'd always choose

You’re the missing piece who'll complete me
And I have already found a love for me
Look at me and stare into my eyes and never look away
Hold my hand and hug me close then hear what I have to say
Be by my side, hold my hand and hug me close then stay with me
68 · Aug 2023
Adrian. (11-9-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I think he already knows
Because I told him so
He just took what I said for granted
I thought I was all that he wanted

Ooh, I lost myself
Chasing after you
I lost myself
Looking for you

But then, you just ignored me
Yet you just seem uninterested in me
Oh, you wanted me to be
I never wanted to be

But I never lose you
You lost me
I never lost you
Cause you just let me

Go, oh, let me go
Oh, Adrian
You just let me go
Oh, Adrian
67 · Aug 2023
Anecito (7-28-2023)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
You met me at a perfect time
But we both fed up in such a worst crime
Sadly, there is no more words to rhyme
Losing you is much better than losing myself for a lifetime

Been bruised, been scarred for life
Got pointed with a gun and knife
Thank God, I barely made it out alive
Barely kicking just to survive

I thought there seems to be no life after you
Seeing myself miserable over you
For a long time, I hated you
Forgetting everything about you

When it seems that life is just a ride or die
You can’t even look me in the eye
How come you always lie
Everything is already said and done, goodbye

Stop trying so hard for things to work out for me
For the both of us, for you and me
You said you loved me
But time never lead you back to me

Two hearts still beat on with different rhythms
Collated on the different sides of every prism
Like the fragments of my broken heart
Everything fell apart

I hope we should let it go now
Letting go of all the hurts and pains now
I poured my whole heart out for you
But you hated yourself for letting me go

You gave me only a 3-month trial
Hopeful enough we would reconcile
Time was never on our side
Hope you float on it, life is a tide

Love seems too splendid
Then, like a call you left me unattended
But I don’t mind
Time alone cannot erase the memory you left behind

Hour glasses and stopwatches are all useless
Hoping for you ‘fess up, I’m breathless
Asking myself why’d you run away?
Runaway far away from today

Maybe you changed your mind approaching me
Instead, you chased and approached other girls
Why would I bother force you to stay with me?
I know my worth is weighed in gold and pearls

But you played me like a doll
Bounced me back like a ball
Guessed me like a mind game
Whispered in your name
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
We never know the whole story
We knew they both had a history
I only know the gist of it
But the mariteses cannot get over with it

Feeling victim for clout
They probably know by now what it was all about

He was a charming young man
While she was a selfish and materialistic woman
He only wanted to give, to love
But he was killed out of mercy, out of hate or love

Saving yourself while killing someone you love
They both seem to know what they need to shove
Forget everything in an oblivious way
An unforgivable menace comes along your way

You should be careful by now about the way you acted or behave
But that doesn’t mean you will be saved
Your days are counted but out-numbered
But you felt guilty, feeling encumbered

Consider yourself lucky for making it out alive
Choosing yourself to be alive just to survive

Yeah, because you prolly should have known by now
It is not what god wanted, but something that evil allows
You are the bait in someone’s hook
I hope you let yourself off the hook

Your asukarera de papa is not almighty
Because shiny things are not all shiny
They might blind you; it was indeed too good to be true
Some are pretentious to reassure, while some are real and pure

You’re the prey of the hunter
Feeling like an undercover
Everything was yet to be discovered
Not gonna happen that a lifeless interest was left to be unexplored

You were the precious bunny in his tantalizing eyes
At that time, the spirit of jealousy was on the rise
They said he was in a higher-being position
He got a family, a wife and four children

Hence, He got distracted in the beautiful garden of Eden
But the mistress and the * were in an awkward juxtaposition

But he was not a god, nor was a saint
He was handling any issues like a brief feint
He blamed god for everything else
He was feeling blessed, no more, no less

He said god was on his side
But as far as it gets interesting, the devil was his bride

Now you’re the target of the killer
This phenomenon was an indestructible thriller
He may have pocket knives, guns, arrows, ammo, name it
Best for you to forget or believe it

He marks the X on the spot
He left you there, lying on the streets to rot
He grinned so much now you’re gone
The mission was accomplished and done

But I hope you listened to me, but you never did
You gained so much of what you want to benefit

Millions of blood money were used in the wrong situation
Now that she got her decision, everything is in transition
Now you’re six feet below the ground
Now she's playing like a victim, feeling depressed that you're not around

She may be spending a lot to compensate for the pain
The trauma and the blame have left there in your mind, they remain
To lessen the pain and the burden
It doesn't make you any less golden

To lessen the sins, you have committed
Since you're so selfish, your sins were never admitted

It doesn’t matter if you visit him, any day, any night
You killed an innocent life, that's not right
From your selfish deeds, knowingly you have needs
You only think of yourself, self

You never should have bothered him in the first place
Now he was in a better place

He believed he was holy
But your soul is agonizing, deadly, slowly but surely
Holy enough to involve others
Flushing everything down the gutter

Tasked others to do the crime
It was not god's timing, but the devil's time
He thought he was protected by the saints and the gods
For the sake of their bad blood

He made religion his shield
Everything will be revealed
But makes evil schemes behind the church’s back
Your body and soul, later on, will be the hell's snack

The mastermind was his lover
He said he'll leave his wife for another
Felt guilty enough to care for the dead
Now you're a famewhore, a memer, your issues spread

But it’s too late, stop pretending
You never loved him, you were only good at pretending
You used him many times, **** him all you want
But you were not so nonchalant

Clinging unto your asukarera de papa for money and fame
By simply calling and talking to him, he can sense you are no longer the same

Spoiling you for getting everything
He is such a scary thing
You even fooled yourself about him wanting you
He is just ******* you, getting your nerve out of you

You got the nerve to keep asking him
Singing him praises and hymns
Visiting his tomb, telling him, you'd wish him to be your groom

You never thought of him even once or twice
Now they've pressed you for charges, no running away now
It's time to pay the lifetime price
You've been a spoiled brat, somehow

They said you keep buying him useless things
Now, seeing him in a tux, lying in his casket, unattached strings


But later on, when you feel sad and depressed, it gets funny
You traded his soul for the money
Don’t you know what power it will bring to the world?
Chaos and death are unfurled

You may be pretty and angelic
Being a ****** suit you but not being dramatic or sympathetic
But whom the **** knows what your mischievous attitude and behavior did to him
You were the best actress in the show, trying to fit in the show to look like a film

His worth never meant something to you
Now that you got the best view
His worth is just a dime that fell on the floor
You are not that worth it anymore

A lot of people believed though
You kept on faking it though
You got the nerve to chill and swim in the sea
They labelled you as the pokpok ng *
*, you see

You got the audacity to sleep, eat and work
Well, the best reaction is just to smirk
After the incident, after what you’ve done to them
Now you've got the hellish realm, to protect yourself from them

After what you’ve done to the bereaved family
Until further notice, you were no longer in fantasy

What lies ahead, what lies behind and what lies beyond it all
They will surely blame you all
You never deserve the best girlfriend award, wildcard
But she was ignored, they implored

They only want to give you the trophy you deserve, it was a catastrophe
She treated his family nastily

He was never released or in peace
But let's pay our respect to the deceased
His soul was in misery, in restlessness
I guess you seem relentless

Say your comforting and doubtful prayers
Come and show everyone your crocodile tears
Telling everyone your lies and faking a smile
Just before everything was settled, even the error and trial

Though reminiscing those memories, he left behind
But everyone seems to turn an eye so blind
Your eulogy was only a show
Everyone knows the truth but still, they went to go on with the flow

Whereas hiding your true feelings, feeling glad
Behind the curtains, you tell everything to your sugar dad
While everyone cried their heart out, their eyes were bawling
Got no sleep, tired of overthinking

What do they call you?
You’re a ******* *****, home-wrecker, concubine
Mistress, *****, *******, harlot
That is what they call you
I mean, now that's a lot

Pretend to your daddy, and tell him your intention
Your soul is hungry for love and attention
You're no brainer, just a dummy
Whose soul is thirsty for money

Your soul started agonizing in pain
It is nothing that your self-gain
You are alive but felt hellish guilty as ****
Wait till god plucks your life like a wasted duck

You mask your motives
Thus, everything in this issue we bet seems explosive
You ask for sympathy to gain self-esteem
**** your life, your dream

You do not want to 'fess up to yourself
Hiding the truth like a book on its shelf
You always mess up with everyone’s family
Your foul words are profanity, what you did was an act of inhumanity

You are the mastermind from the beginning to the end of time
You came to his tomb, confessing and repenting your sins from time to time
He keeps visiting you in your dreams
Quit that routine, you're no longer his queen

Asking for mercy and peace of mind
But you never mind
You never thought of loving him was the best thing you ever did
You're a one skilled ***** after all, as fulfilled

How come you **** up and never listened to your conscience
Now you have to face the consequences.
The most trending ****** case in The Philippines
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I have loved you enough
Not to pursue you yet
Cause not all that I see
Is what I get

Oh, I don't want to regret
So, I'd rather forget

Ooh, the words you said
Keeps on messing in my head
Ooh, the things we both did
Keeps on running in my head

But if you would ask me
I would answer right away
I would be yours
I'd like to be called yours


Ooh, this time is ours
This love is ours
If you would ask me
I'll be here to stay
65 · Aug 2023
ezsurie. (8/31/23)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Everyone might not get it,
Too many times I rather give up or quit
There’s no one else to commit
No one else to admit

Being bullied many times, sometimes
Feeling like a pantomime
I ain’t a shifted paradigm
Feels like my life is a movie in a primetime

I’m an outcast to the world
Felt like I belong more in the netherworld
Seems like their minds are gnarled
Every time I say I hated the world

Unwanted to the family I never belong in
My worth felt like a trash bin
I prefer not to lose but to win
Even when I get drunk, the solution to everything is not a tonic gin

I see life in ropes and knives
Are they even horrified with their own lives?
When they chose to summon a welcome- hope kicks in and revives,
I see myself sinking instead of choosing to thrive

I see death in this situation I’m in right now
When I send help to thee, then come thou
Said he, “you reap what you sow”
Grab me my arrow and bow

I’m not myself when I see flashing strobe lights
When it’s half past midnight
I know I don’t wanna fight
Even if I’m not right

It got me stiff, jerking, lying on the floor
Once it got me knocking in someone else’s door
Waiting for my turn to get sober
It rots the hell out of my core

I feel delighted in medicines and hospital beds
I wish I could just forget everything what’s inside my head
I wish I was lovable enough to be heard
Unknowingly dumbfounded me, unaware of what lies ahead
64 · Aug 2023
AC <3 AD (10-15-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I like it when you smile
I get so happy
When you talk to me
Even just for a while

You remember little details of me
Your Mom was so much closer to me
I wonder how you would feel
That this feeling I feel is real

I have prayed so hard to God
That You would come along my way
I knew it was the will of God
For me to hear you say

Just stay, stay here with me
Even just for today
I want you to see
That you're the only one for me

Your eyes were like stars
Look how they shine so bright
When you look at me
When you stare at me

Your voice is like an angel I long to hear
Right now, I wish you were here
Who knows what I fear?
To slip you away, my dear

It was like my whole world's already in front of me
It was like my answered prayers' already in front of me
You are like a distant star
Look how you shine so bright

Save me, save me from drowning
I'm slowly falling
Falling deep into you
Falling deep into an ocean of love

And I am deeply in love
Deeply in love with you

I'm afraid to lose you
Even though you're not even mine
But I'll be fine
It's just that I am missing you

Every love song reminds me of you
Loving you was like breathing
But never interested enough to stop breathing
Cause every beat of my heart is calling you
61 · Aug 2023
Dead man. (10-24-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
He is a dead man walking
A dead man crawling
At the end of the night
On the edge of glory

He was a hunter
And I was his prey
Now let us bow and pray
So that we will once again be together

Ooh, all I see is bright lights
Bright lights up here in the city
I could be this pretty
No need to worry

I feel so immortal
Freed by your kind
I feel so immortal
Let this be our daily grind

I think I; I think I
I am falling in love again, I
I think it’s you
You made me smile

When I think of you
For a while
I get so nervous
It felt dangerous

When I hear your name
I’m no longer the same
No one will be put to blame
I never live in fame

You got to pull the trigger
Let the bullets fly
You got to have a fuel for the fire
Let it burn in flames

I will always come running back to you
I will rise up high coming for you
I was born a dead man walking
A dead man crawling

I’m as cold as a freezer
I just want to see you cry
Come walk with me along the wire
But baby I am untamed

I could be so numb
Then you could be this dumb
I can do possible things
Which no one could ever do things

I never knew I could do
I was once a mortal
But I was freed by your kind
And made me be like you

Now, I am one of the other immortals
But I never needed your wings to fly
At least I bet on it to try
And You are all always on my mind
57 · Aug 2023
THREE (10-31-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
You make me feel brand new
Let us just enjoy the view
Sipping champagne, sitting by the porch
Watching the sun sets

Let us make up and mend the pain
And let us light up some torch
I just wanted to do this with you
I can’t forget

325,000 and 600 minutes
365 days, 1 minute
24 hours a day, 12 hours a day
I’m so glad I found you, and make love to you

At exactly three in the morning
I still reminisce the old times
At exactly three in the morning
My midnight thoughts came by this time

Just a blur, in the blink of an eye
Everything fades, you and me, we’re done
It was already gone
Inside of me, I will die, I have died

Every time I cry, my eyes were already dried
Oh, just like a smoke, you were gone
Just like a smoke, what we had is done
Yeah, I will try to bury it in oblivion

This love is not a competition
Whoever gets the most attention
Or lacks affection
Will get an elimination from my life

What a bitter strife
Oh, at exactly three in the morning
I cry myself to sleep
I already am falling into deep


I have to forget this feeling
What has happened to me at three in the morning
Will remain a history
Until now, it became a history.
57 · Aug 2023
Boys (11-24-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I don’t need boys in my life
They need me
They want me
Because they want me in their life

You told me you loved me
But I end up chasing you
You showed me motives and assumed you love me
But I ended up stalking you

But I realized now my worth
And that is the truth

Guess I was only your past time girl
But not the girl you want to settle with
Guess I was only your hookup girl
But not as a potential lover you want to be with

I ain’t that girl who wants to be your slave
I want to bury my love for you
And bring it with me in my grave
Just to forget you

Boys only love to play games
But never even loved the fool
But what a shame
Because you look like a fool

Compared to me who never lose you
You lost me
Thinking that everything around you
And everything that revolves around you

Is just a game
Now that the cards are on the table
This feeling is no longer stable
I am no longer the same

Tables should be turned
Bridges should be burned
Every once in a blue moon
I fell out of love too soon

Never settle for a boy who just wants to have fun
Who just wants to be at the center of the spotlight?
That boy who wants to be always right
That boy who loves to be under the sun

I only love the players
But not the game
I only am disappointed in players
And I forget their names

In short, I never want boys in my life
Instead, they come for me
They need me, they want me
They love to have me in their life

I don’t need boys in my life
I live on my own
They only want me to be a part of their life
But nah, I chose to live on my own

Boys are like a poison in your mind
A toxic person in your life
A distracted and crazy you are what you will find
So never entertain them, so that you won’t have a miserable life.
57 · Aug 2023
Love lots (10-23-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I want to have you
I got to have you
I want to have your last name
Though we’re different and the same

You never knew how much you mean to me
How much I love you so
How much you were so special to me
How much I miss you so

Loving you was red
I cannot get you out my head
With you, I found clarity
In you, I found sanity

Loving you was blue
How I wish you knew
That I want to say this to you
That how much do I love you so

Oh, I have been searching for someone like you
Long before I knew you
Long before I hear your name
I know I am no longer the same
57 · Aug 2023
Serendipity (10-15-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
You, you look like the rest of my life
And I want to have you, you for the rest of my life
But if I am everything, I want to be your Queen
And you are crowned king, and we will have to come clean

But If I am anything, I would be everything
Just for you, just for you
I want to be yours; I am yours.

You are my reason behind my happiness
behind my loneliness
You are my cure after every pain
You are my gain
57 · Aug 2023
Cerberus. (10-23-2022)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
She growls like an uneducated, unmannered woman
She ain't an athlete
But she chases a man like she's on a marathon
She's a desperate woman
But a ***** you could easily defeat
With just a blow, she loses and I won

Why does she chase him?
When he already loved another
Why does she still stay and never let go of him?
They're no longer meant for each other

She’s just wasting her entire life
Her entire time just for him
He doesn’t deserve to be his wife
He’s too good for him

She lost her entire life trying her best
To be loved by him was a test
She was fooled and used
She was gullible and it’s no use

"Let them bark like Cerberus", said she
“Let them howl like she’s more beautiful than Venus”, said she
But she’s the real Cerberus
Chases and forces herself to be loved by

She's nothing compared to me
She's no match for me

She was more than what he meets in the eyes
She was once the apple of his eyes
Her life is filled with lies
She is comforted with lies

And is hurt by the truth
She never knows nor values her worth

She was beautiful but has poor judgment of character
She lets other people down
To gain self-satisfaction from others
She didn't even know she's already down

She bangs like a rifle
Explodes like a missile
She's so gullible in one in a million
She no longer has companion

She’s a trophy wife
Such a life would become bitter strife
A desperate, pathetic *****
No cure would get rid of the itch

Maybe her mouth needs stitching
Cerberus is quite noisy to be barking.
She is destined for growling, for howling

“I’m an educated *****”, said she
But Cerberus is a well-mannered *****, said he
57 · Aug 2023
Him (10-24-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
His eyes were color brown
He is tall, dark and handsome
His hair is colored black
But I cannot look away

I smile a lot when he looks at me
He was beside me all the time
My heart beats faster from time to time
When he is talking to me

I was in a shotgun with him
Listening to the music playing in the radio
While talking to him
And reminiscing to what we had before

How I wish we took a photo
But I realized it all after
It was too late
Too little, too late

I have always longed for you
But I have no guts to tell you
Long enough I got tired to pursue you
Ooh, I am the best one for you
53 · Aug 2023
Childhood (10-23-21)
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
Like a shadow, you’re always stuck with me
Even if I push you away
You always keep coming back to me
I guess, this is where you’ll stay

We were inseparable
You know you are adorable
Our parents were best friends
Maybe we can be more than friends
I am about to reminisce my childhood
Us playing hide and seek
Us taking a bath in the rain
Us playing tag

But now that we are experiencing adulthood
Yet this feeling is some kind of a magic trick

You were my favorite topic
You were always this meek
Just know that I love you
And nobody else know

I didn’t feel that this would be so much pain
My heart felt a little jet lag

Oh, we were neighbors since birth
Our age gap is only three years apart
Since we became friends from the start
I never planned to flirt

With you, I found my happiness
With you, I found also loneliness
Loving you was like living and dying every day
But letting go was like living in hell every day
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
He was my moon
I was his stars
We shine so bright in the dark
Up in the night sky

Was it too soon?
To go this far
I left a mark
But I never try
Seeing you was black
Losing you was grey
Having you was red
Oh, being with you is yellow

I keep myself back on track
When skies turn grey
I am all alone in my bed
Thinking about all I know

Dreaming of you was my best habit to break
Losing you was beyond my control
It was the risk I could take
Losing you made me lose control

Oh, this love is fleeting
This love is reeling
I’m on the ceiling
I am in love with this feeling

You are the fuel to my fire
Come walk with me along the wire
Let us end in flames of paradise
You are my blessing in disguise
yndnmncnll Aug 2023
I got no courage to tell you
But this feeling amazes me
All the road I travelled on
Leads me all the way to you

This life is not easy
I hope let us hold on

You have been bullying me
Since the beginning
I hated you so much too
But now, I loved you

My classmates thought we were lovers
Since we look like one
Since we look good for each other
But it's all done
Yet suddenly, unexpectedly

I fell for you
Without giving hints
Oh, since the beginning
This is too tough for me

This feeling is just sleeping
For over a thousand times now
This feeling is not fleeting
This feeling is legit now

No matter how desperate I am to avoid it
Yet all the roads I have travelled on
Leads me back to you
For no reasons at all

Baby, you’re worth it
I hope you should hold on
Hold on to me, I’ll hold on to you
You are my only reason at all

It was iconic and ironic, yes
That a second child fell for you, yes
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