Four walls
Two windows
One bed
Busy head

What I would give
For open pastures
And a calm mind

You're happy
You're free
No more pain
You found the key

No more problems
No more worries
No more secrets
You must bury

An angel you are
And forever will be
You chose to leave earth,
And you chose to leave me.

I need to write
I need to write
Im caged, I'm fragile
Im drowning in fright

Awaken my body
Please my mind
His timing is perfect
So, whens the right time?

I cant hear myself breath
I dont notice myself think
The pen is on the paper
But I'm the missing link

God, why cant i move forward?
What is the purpose in the struggle?
It is harder than imagined
To pop my comfort bubble

This is how I spend my day.
Lay in bed,
Close my eyes,
Open them,
Pick up my phone,
Put it down,
Close my eyes again.
I want to do this,
And that.
But I wont get out of bed.
Something needs to change.
Maybe that thing
Is me.

My pillows aren't right
One side too fluffy
The other too flat
Flip it.
Switch it.
Bunch it.
Theres no use to it.
Maybe,
It's time
To change
Pillows
After all.

When sadness comes
I push away
"No, I dont want to do this today"

Because if I face my fears
So dark, so clear
Joy won't have a reason to stay

Supress, supress
Clean up your mess
And live to smile a new day

I cast a shadow
Throw myself into battle
I am strong
I am wise
But
Im depressed
Should i undress
My mind of mess
For you to get
Whats in my head
Im all thats left
Im intelligent
Im irrelevant
Though benevolent
Im on top
Now im below
Inside my world
Theres no place to go
Feed me lies
So i can grow