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Karijinbba Jun 2019
Once Upon A Time
I once stood up ****
immortalized in photoshoots
as my lover's VENUS.
Down I laid in deep shame
more than to pose for
an unanounced **** Cannon
photo shooting spree there
upon a cut tree I stood prompted
to lay down on it.
A tree of life simulation a second chance to birth a new dream
the huge cut stump sadness
signifying our child lost!
Our magestic forest land dream
upon that Hill was born.
A new Adam a new Eve a new beginning.
Stonned by past orphaned wars
unawareness dormant beast
was the pain of denial my abandonment syndrome.
It all proved futile yesterday
but today I share my true story.
all awakened struggling to heal

I hate this car filled city
my heart breaks in loneliness
I surely must love the suburbs.
being sociable realizing my lossess
where i missed my marks

My secret friends are trees
ancient green cedar woods.
Others are masked behind this cyber mirror eagerly reading me
some even ask me, hey
How do you do?
To not let the dark
get to me!
commenting and cheering me
so, the mystic forest trees
see me, hear me
re-burrying my past secrets
and pots of gold in roots

I do love the woods now
that always had terrified me
since my dad was shot nearby
in our forest land's I was five .
I still hear the gun shots!
I hear my babies cries too
in the enemy's hands hurting

The stump became
my millionaire mystery bank
burrying all our cash loot as dowry
my grieving lover twin flame divine
with insignias it all had arrived carefully inscribed
"Great fortune to Believer"
"Fame true love to the adventurous clever digger beauty"
"Deathly curses, bad luck,
great calamity poverty to the
foolish desserter unbeliever"
urgently advising to
"Hurry up it's all time sensitive!"
yelled my fiancee's love letters.
A stump, a tree and a elite lover
among magestic tall green trees,
carved my fate today to return!

And in that mystic Hill far away
And once upon a time true magic touched me thus changing us both
and with this mystery to rejoice
life makes sense where love lost.
All trees now tell me bittersweet stories and I bitterly weep.

The stumps chopped trees
in the nearby streets hurt deeply
I was once that Queen bee of
Once Upon a Time
chosen to change Earth
where rich could marry poor
women not men would rule
Where wealthy share
their treasures earned
or inherited cheerfully so
changing lives by the score.

I was promised nine diamond tiaras
For each baby ours born of twin flame twin souls our "glued together baby."

Our Memoir book to linger forever linked by the magic of true love.
I found my old dream of dreams
my peaceful own Reign RDDBBA!
That was then joy happiness lost
it's life saving rejuvenating today.

Although the trees in
that forest lands adored me
they too detested me.
Covertly wearing masks too
furious with my dead calm silence
then misunderstood no more tonight
all tests buried to be worthy ofof joining my lover's world
Green yellow leaves thundering
in wind murmuring sad songs
no one but me can now hear
their frantic Psalmic cries;
Nature it seems it too
takes back as much as it gives.

Our bitter harvest dreams
burried abandoned sleeping
where our road fork bent in
as I laid posing his Venus of Urbino
in the **** back then;
stonned bewildered scared
feeling abandoned alone,
all by me as punishment seen!
All a secret remained a lifetime.
So heartbreaking it is.
the nagging pain won't subside
Without timely Second Chance Vissions
our awesome dreams
couldn't breathe in the face of reality
my lover's gap dividing.

In the end my tree of life sighs
as it burries my body
deep dead asleep
under its mighty living roots
the stump and the tree
left behind devour all
all whats left of me,
sigh.
~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
All rights reserved
revised a 6/29-19 /10-2020
In the end we matter only to those kindred souls who remember us in our true light understanding
our inner core loving us
as we were
in good and in bad times.
thanks for reading
Karijinbba Jun 2019
What we don't know will
harm us faster then we blink.
Whatever you do for pity's
sakes run if in danger call out "help" socorro, auxilio, ayuda
in any language needed!!
yell knock on doors
take on arms knife rock
defend your life but above all a childs life in danger
yours or not defend it
if you can pets lives matters too
love live constantly
in awarenes that not all is as it appears to be with others
theres meaning in everything
thats spoken or covertly done
pray unstapably day and night
rest vigilant until
you find safety but move put
ACTION VOICE SOUND
and then dance to the tune of freedoms peace
seek timely justice
of civil rights violations don't be naive too trusting too distrusting
see the clues of good or right
or bad and wrong in all carbon units at home and with
all strangers alike
test friends in the spirit
ask them many questions
bad entities aren't too clever
their clues of deceit are always in plain view if you are
aware
meditating with eyes
half open
half closed mind allert awake
you'll live like I did just for pity's sakes don't wait too long for weird elements to change
or grow a heart they won't
and you and your dear ones could be harmed irreparably
or perish loosing all other treasures if your spirit remains broken too long
If you lose accept defeat
triumph will arrive in another
wing
believe it and it will come.
~~~~~
Bt Karijinbba
Sometimes all we have left is knowing other many souls thirst for love
of friend mother brother sister
in the sages willing to offer it.
stay blessed always.
Karijinbba Jun 2019
No matter how
past hurts molding us
our twinsouls remain like
precious children bonds
staying lifetimes linked
sometimes as a blessing
unexpectedly
arriving
we can't get either one
of them out from our heart
Perhaps its only human
to remain ever linked
in the arena of
attachments
to heavenly or hellish
bonds unconsciously
wooven in us
like me unto you
simply missing my mark
failing to seize my moments
all mine for the taking! Happily ever after! eternal bliss
forever missed

"to deny love is an eternal loss
it has no reparation
neither in time nor in eternity."
ancient DeJa-Vu! love!
please take your masks off fear not.
~~~~~~~
By:Karijinbba
revised 2/26/2020
written 2019.
I was thinking of why you walked away
from each other once lost and found
instead of working problems out not to regret it all later on
perhaps walking away
from someone precious
is not possible
if linked in the spirit soul
as in twin flame souls
the instant we met
Afterwards you hurt
me badly and after many
lifetimes I still love you!
its called true love.
  Jun 2019 Karijinbba
Pagan Paul
.
A rose from a window
looks like any other rose,
but as the old lady stares
out through the thin glass
a fondness develops,
begins to form a memory,


reaching back,
grasping the past,

that very slowly forms
the image of a rose,
proud in an old garden,
upstanding to catch the eye
of a young girl
staring out of a window.



© Pagan Paul (19/06/19)
.
  Jun 2019 Karijinbba
sarah
late at night, i lie awake
thinking of things i should have said
all the mistakes i've made
and signs i should've read

then think about what i can't live without
you, front and center in my mind
sometimes it feels like halfway love
almost, but not quite

still, parts of you make me whole
who i am and who i need to be
i think of love letters that weren't torn up
feelings of blue and green

when i'm without you
blank page, artless innocence
i realize how dependent i've grown to you
and feel the need to create a distance

sometimes i look up at the purple sky
and wonder if you're looking too
i gaze at the colors and the beauty of it all
though its beauty would never compare to you
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