I didn’t hide it this time
I didn’t bundle up my mess
I didn’t  disguise it in cloth
I did leave it there
Open in the trash for people to see
Knowing the twisted necks and judging faces that will follow  
I did acknowledge how women it is to be ashamed
But I remind myself
not all blood comes from wounds

Questions here

Questions there

Questions in my head

Questions in my heart

Questions tearing me apart

About john

Then Paxton

Then others

John
Why don't you love me?
Why dont you want me?
Have I ever hurt you?
Am I too much?
Do you like them?
Why do you wanna do stuff with me?
Are you moving on?

Paxton
Will you always love me?
Are you losing feelings?
Why do you talk about others so much now?
Am I too clingy?
Am I too jealous?
Are you lying?
Why are you less honest?

To the others
Did you ever like me?
Why don't you ever talk to me anymore?
Now that I've left am I just a memory?
Do you see me or just my broken?
Am I a person or a scar and a cut?
Why don't you notice?

To myself
Why do you do this?
Why can't I eat?
Why can't I feel?
Why do I switch?
Why do I smile when I cry inside?
Why am I always pretending?
Why do I love so easily?
Whats wrong with me?
Leave me be

Roses
They are
Simple
Yet abstract

Black
The colour of death
Of pain
But also of mystery
Yet rare to find a rose
Of such a colour

Red
The colour of love
But the colour of blood
And anger
Oh so common
But what does it mean
That these are in correlation
To one another

White
The colour of peace
The colour of emptiness
Of
Nothing
So
Is peace only reachable
By being empty?

Pink
The colour of playful
Of innocent
Yet also of the weak
What could this mean?

Blue
The colour of calmness
Yet also of sad
So is your sadness calming?
Or is the calming feeling sad?

I was too broken for him
And too broken for her
Eventually you're gonna see
That I'm too broken for you

I say things are fine
When really they aren't

I do this because
I don't want you to leave
I don't want you to break my heart

But doing this tears me apart

But now you brought stuff up
That's started a fight
And it's pulling you
Away from me

I waited for you to say
I love you
And you finally have
But not in the setting I wanted
As you have now left me here
On my own
Because you need to think

But please
Don't be like everyone else

Don't leave me

I find myself missing you

I wake up to our memories calling my name
I fall asleep to my forbidden fantasies
Pulling me away

I find myself missing you
Night
And day

But
I'm happy
With who I'm with now
So why does my heart remind me of you
Whenever I take a break
From the smile on my face

Consume me within you

As I walk through the dark
Through the gate of another world
Consume me within you

Wrap me in your pain
And consume me within your rage

You are my companion
And my worst fear

You whisper to me the lies people tell
Then turn around and whisper your own

You whisper to me the hate in peoples hearts
Then turn around and consume me within your own

Sometimes I wish for you to let me go
But without you
I feel as if I'm no one

Nonexistent

Like the smallest whisper carried by the wind
Could wisp my will away

So no
Don't go

Wrap me in the dark
And pull me into the darkest corners of reality
As you consume me
Within you

Take me back
To times of tranquility
In a time of peace
And mental stability

To escape my feelings
Of guilt and regret,
All the trauma and pain
I just...cannot forget

Where my mind is pure
With social innocence
Deaf to their words
Of cynical influence

Where fear is a myth
A story of fiction
Condemned by verse
To eternal extinction

I could be..

Free from the trauma
Free from the pain
I can erase my history
And walk tall again

By Darren Wall