I will fight to become all that I can be
More than just a shell and an illusion
A soul meant to wonder to perfection and to fly free.

A Stained soul
Endless moments of Pain Painting My Soul in Red and Brown
He endures the worst yet he never keeps a frown.
Ownward he pushes until he finds a solution to the end
of this massive black energy that wishes for at his knees he suould bend.
Rising his sword of strength from within his powerfully beating heart..
this true warrior that battles the darkness from within and all around him
Stabs the force in it's cold beating heart.
As this "moment" of pain's entity dies
Another rises.
He keeps one eye open as he sleeps
and battles still...
Until his victory song is song and the voices shout out in powerful cries.

They trace down your cheeks...
during the loneliest of nights.
They gather between your collar bones...
through your battles and fights.

They brim in your eyes...
assuring you the glimmer of hope.
They drip off your chin...
*like a thread of droplets to help you cope.

They wet your shivering smile...
reminding you of your strength and humility.
They fall on your palms...
appreciating your sacrifices and sincerity.

They seep into your skin...
to fuel the undying love in your heart.
They feed your soul with gratitude
*until the time comes when you shall depart.

i miss you like a lunar eclipse.
you dont cross my mind 364 days out of 365
but every four years
a total eclipse of my thoughts
occur

and on burning cold nights
lonely witching hour
does my mind wander so
remembering soft touches
and melting whispers
fleeting feelings
and lingering lips

frustration clouds my memories
like fog wisping across the moon
shadows and doubts created in its
absence that are
only visible once in a blue moon

I'm sorry that I am
so rough around the edges
I get frightened so easily
and I'm torn apart by how insecure I can be
I don't mean to be
so rough around the edges
I know you love me and
I know you've healed my wounds
I'm sorry that I am
so rough around the edges
constantly asking if you love me
constantly feeling I am not good enough
I just need you to know
I know it's not your fault
It was never my intention to be
so rough around the edges
I am traumatized by a life I wish
I never had
I wish to delete
everything but you
then maybe I wouldn't be
so rough around the edges
-m.a.

Retinues of scholars and sages,
United in ages of our personal cages.

Desire to eclipse our wages linked in our pages, but always looking our worth in numerical gauges.

Truly the painful retrospect quantified aroma that arousal the mind in spiral, and the very essense of black hole is true chaos in it's definition of creation in us.

As I stand to breathe for a moment, I look to see that it haven't even been started, and what little  composure that exist in me dissipated the foundation of a cup that cracked.

Gaspe to grasp that it is ticking, and the sensation of lagging is more apparent with each passing day.

Maybe if I close my eyes, maybe I can rejuvenate to start again, or wake from this dream.

(remembering)

Was still in the shower
draped with a thick towel
shook head...whisked drops of water
combed dripping short hair with fingers,
then reached for Q-tips,
dried right ear,
another tip...for the left.......suddenly,
the world went silent...utterly...totally!
.......i saw  my eyes froze
...the mirror, was too close...


i had forgotten...i sometimes do,
it's now ten.....and six months,
from that early mornin'

when distant sounds...cruel truths,
pursued me without respite...but, God is always good,
after my storm, came that proverbial calm,
indescribable!...that suddenness....the quietness
of those fireworks bursting...in front of my eyes
they unfolded...and enfolded...
easing out...the gravity of consequences,
slowly......i accepted truths.....and changes...
never skipped thanksgiving......i now know
when, and when not to keep fingers crossed...
those were days of clasped  hands, in prayer,
believing.....some good always comes out
....of a dark, or soundless moment...

i guess, Q-tips will always scare me...the
struggle is alive....seems dead other days
...but, a kind of warm glow eases my fears...
when in total silence, i believe, somehow,
someone will come, and hold my elbow...


Sally

Copyright August 19, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan