When he cried on the cross
he made me believe in Jesus.

When he blessed a devil child
he made me believe in His Word.

When he mated death
he made me believe in the light.

When he ate a wild strawberry
he made me know love.

When he held his son in a new land
he made me feel the wisdom of fathers.

When he showed the hidden Kroners
he made me feel total shame

When he held his dead child in his arms
he made me understand the resurrection of grief.

Max you made me forever hunger
for the million lights illuminating the dark
upon which I build my celluloid church.


The Max von Sydow films referenced in order of appearance:  
The Greatest Story Ever Told
The Exorcist
The Seventh Seal
Wild Strawberries
Pelle the Conqueror
Shame
The ****** Spring

It was the year I drove over the Tappan Zee
for the first time of what would be hundreds.
It was the year I went five months without
my parents, living off broccoli cheddar soup
and ham sandwiches. The year I got cabin
fever and took a November bus ride through
early sunsets and empty houses, as the last
few brown leaves hung on by threads.
When I passed the Quinnipiac River, I let
swans drift away. It was the year spent sitting,
curled in my chair until the sunlight crept
and sunk beneath the torn carpet.
2010 was laundry detergent and fleeting innocence.
It was bed sheets and rain drops hiding flames.
It was the year I preferred ***** over church,
and spent the next 4 trying to erase.

Dita Von Teese
Was very smitten
With what had been written
About her knees -

Being a *** kitten
Is something
I'm at ease with.

I'm truly elated
I have knees that please.