I DONT WANT PEOPLE
TO THINK
THEY HAVE TO
DEAL WITH ME
JUST BECAUSE
YOU ARE MY FRIEND
I UNDERSTAND
YOU WANT TO HELP
BUT YOU ******* CANT
AND THATS ALRIGHT.
I CANNOT HELP FEELING LIKE THIS.
DO NOT FEEL USELESS
WHEN I AM;
BREAKING DOWN
AND ALL YOU CAN SAY IS
‘Its going to be okay’
BECAUSE THATS ALL
YOU CAN DO,
ENCOURAGING WORDS
ARE ENOUGH;
YOU ARE TRYING
TO HELP.
I DONT WANT
TO BE YOUR PROBLEM
IM NOT ANYONES PROBLEM
BUT MY OWN
.
I DONT WANT PEOPLE
TO FEEL
WORTHLESS
JUST BECAUSE;
THE CHEMICALS
IN MY BRAIN,
ARE NOT RIGHT;
OR IM JUST HAVING
A BAD DAY,
AND I NEED SOMETHING
TO TAKE MY MIND
OFF THINGS.
SOMETHING TO EASE
THE FEELING.
DONT SAY SORRY
THAT YOU CANNOT FIX ME;
AS YOU WATCH ME
INHALE CIGARETTE SMOKE,
FILLING MY LUNGS
WITH POISON THAT
NUMBS MY BRAIN
FOR A WHILE.
IM SORRY
IM SO COMPLICATED,
IM SORRY IM NOT OKAY
(I’m sorry I’m shouting)
BUT THIS IS HOW
MY MIND SOUNDS,
ALL THE TIME
AND
I CANNOT FIND QUIET;
EVEN IN THE DARK CORNERS
THE CRACKS OF MY SKULL
AND THE CREVICES
OF MY BRAIN