I do not need the world,
At all.
The winds and the waves crash,
and the calamity ensues...
and I sometimes
don't even know.
people fall in love,
receive fame, fortune,
accolades and more.
Yet, there's always something missing.
Something still not there,
that wasn't there before.
....
I remember that feeling.
The craving, insatiable emptiness
That can only be filled one way.
And you're always pushing the line further
and there's nothing you won't do for just a day.
.....
It isn't that way anymore.
I have a new sense of dissatisfaction.
My heart can only be mended one Way.
In only one fashion.
Whenever I am not at peace,
I look to the sky
and the Lord reaches back out
to me.

Back to school
Everyones trying to look cool.
When you're just there, staring like a fool.
Sitting inside the classroom with some blurry thoughts.
Waiting for someone to talk.
But nobody did.
Is this the feeling of hell?
school is hell.
dont ask me why, because I'll say...
well,
Lunch time, eating alone.
Classes sitting at the back alone. Its like you just wanna be gone.
Walking to your class, and doesnt even know where to go.
Everyones giving you some ***** looks.
You walked and walked and walked, but you're still lost.
Not just lost in school...

But you're also, losing yourself.

I always put everyone else first
Sacrificing my own wants and desires
But for one night
I was selfish
I got what I have wanted for months
Though it’s something many believe I hate
I have desired it for months now
Only with one
Not with anyone else
No matter what others want me to do
To them
With them
None of them
Have stirred this thing within me
Just that one
Now that I have had a taste of what I wanted
I don’t know if I can stay
Here where my desires and whims
Are contained to just one
But not that one
Another of a different feather
Who wishes to cage me
Within their sweet words and pretty promises
Yet I still wish I could be as free
As I was that night
When I was as selfish as I dared
Doing as I pleased
As he pleased
We both were pleased
Whether it was due to the alcohol
Or poor choices
I don’t regret it
Like I do all of those other encounters
These bruises don’t make me shy away
I don’t try to hide them
The whole world can see them for all I care
I put myself first for once
And it didn’t leave me covered in scars

you should have been named warning
you should have had an orange label
you should have alerted me of your potency
and
I should have been more careful
☆

you were everything
and you ruined it
you're nothing now
☆