The air grows heavy around you. One deep breath will do it.
You're not afraid of the pain, but you still hesitate.
Focusing your sight on the smooth skin that covers your thoughts and fears from the world, you decide to do it. Sometimes, you crave it so much that your skin can feel a little itchy.
One line is drawn on your skin. It's not deep enough. It barely bleeds, but it's the step you needed to move forward and let it all go for a while.
Another line, and then another one.
This time, you press the razor blade deeper into your skin. Adrenaline runs through your veins. You wish you could go even deeper, finding the part of you that's been missing from your soul when they broke you. Perhaps, you just broke yourself. Who are you to blame other people, but why do you feel this way towards them?
Forgiving people is easier said than done. Forgiving yourself is... Impossible.
You draw another line. Now your body is covered in dying red roses.
You can't stop. You don't wanna stop. It feels so good, yet so wrong at the same time
It's like a drug, and no matter how long you stay clean, you will fall right back into it.
When you are done, you clean and cover those lines. A long sleeve will do it. No one has to know. You don't need another pair of judgemental eyes on you. Your own presence has judged yourself enough.
You draw a fake smile on your face and go on with your day. You're fine.
You're fine. Everything will be okay, until it's not. What happens next, you may wonder?
I bet you already know it.
