Her kisses were like wine. They left me craving for more even though I knew, that in the end I would be the one with a hangover.

In silence I loved him,
And in silence I have lost him.
In silence I've longed for his hand,
And in silence I've met emptiness.
In silence I fell,
And in silence I heard my own heart breaking...

It makes me sick to think
that  I am sitting at my desk
with tears welling in my eyes
trying to compose
something beautiful to describe
how you put knots in my stomach
in the worst way.
Thinking to myself,
maybe if I make it sound pretty
something beautiful will come out of this.

But you're just a pretty face
with a jet black heart
and I've been telling myself
for way too long
that playing hard to get
will make you a dependable person
When evidently,
I don't need you to be devoted
I need you to be gone.

I wonder why
all the poems I write
Are composed at
the mercy of lovers

And why my lovers
can't be the green grass
that peaks out of
melting snowbanks
in early spring

Or the first sip
of coffee at 8 a.m.
on a mellow Saturday morning
in a cafe next to the lake.

Why do we choose
to rest our weary hearts
on things we can't depend on
When we know that the grass
will appear every spring
and we can sip our coffee
and the sun will rise
and the lake will be full
and so will our hearts

If only we requested
simple things to thrive
We could sip coffee with lovers
Next to the lake
At 8 a.m.
And not feel such pain.

I’ve been sitting at the park by the lake watching lovers and lonely people pass by and at coffee shops reading that book you always talk about thinking to myself how often my mind drifts to the days you've made me feel weightless and that all I want to do is tell you how I feel but love these days is twisted and the worst thing you can do is admit that you care more and that really destroys me because I could really care less if I’m the one that fell harder. I would turn my world upside down for a sliver of time by your side. It would be wonderful to be swept off my feet by you even if it knocks me to the ground.