I buy lighters nowdays
Everyone thinks I smoke
NO I DON'T SMOKE AND HOPEFULLY WILL NEVER
I do light up candles and watch them burn
I do set pages and pages on fire
I do try to burn my thoughts away but they always return
I don't smoke
I color with smoke
Whenever I blow out any candle
I let the grey surround me
Whenever I light it up again
I turn the lights off
So the warm light can color my cold walls.
I don't smoke
But there's cigarettes everywhere around me
Their smoke and hateful scent imprinted on my clothes
And that scent is not mine
NO I smell like candles
My mom put the cigar scent on me
I try to take it off
Shouldn't it be the opposite?
Well I don't smoke
But I am slowly dying.

Jealousy has sold me cheap,
Tore inside my heart and jeans.              
Sold me to a stranger person
That doesn’t know what caring means.

It's been weeks since I put a drop of perfume on my skin
I used to love it.
Now days it feels useless.
I feel like the scent of dream tears and sweaty worries would follow me no matter what I cover my skin with.
I take more showers wishing I'd feel better.
And the calming scent lasts until memories catch up to me.
It feels useless but I'll put perfume on tomorrow... And wait for the scent to slowly dissappear again

I want to get lost in the deep seas
Feel my heartbeat race with the waves
I want to lay somewhere no one sees
And wait for the next moon faze
All this because I found most peace in the water
Pieces of my soul belong in all those sunken sea shells
In there I could see everything better
I can feel happiness inhabit all my cells.
Do I ever want to escape this peaceful dream?
Never...

The sun’s making space for its own warmth
It’s leading me on a far away path
Even though my way is forth
I go way back into the black
And the sun cramps out of it
Telling me to go on and continue what I started
I told it that I cannot fit
Somewhere I wasn’t invited.