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Keilah Jun 2014
I have always thought that cutting my ties
with you would devastate me, would crumble me apart, would rip my heart out and let it trample on a sea bed of nails.

I have always thought of us as the chosen ones. That the years we had would forever be there, that our version of forever will linger for 8 more years.

I have always thought that your kisses will wake me up every morning and will doze me off every night.

I have always thought that your voice will forever sing me songs and lull me back to your arms.

But that is what they all are: *thoughts
Keilah Jun 2014
If I could erase the memories,
I will.
If I could taser myself dead,
I will.
If I could just sleep,
I will.
If I could just unlove you,
If I could just remove you,
If I could just stay,
If I could just change,
If I could just be okay,
If I could just be perfect for you,
I will.

If you could just come back,
please do.
Keilah Jun 2014
Wouldn't our years be wasted
Wasted for every wrong move,
Wrong decision, wrong person?

Wouldn't my efforts be consumed
By flames, sparks and time
Were it all for you?

Wouldn't my mornings be tainted
If I have believed that you were to
Wake up next to me?

Wouldn't I have been a greater fool
To waste my time waking up next to a
Woman who can't give me her all?
Maybe so.
Keilah Jun 2014
Is when you finally told me
that we were too young
to believe in forever
Keilah Jun 2014
I opened the shutters and light eventually claimed
the perfection covered by my blanket. Dozing off
like it wasn't past eight and he had work
to do.

Last night was beautiful. It seemed like we were the after-effect
of a writer’s figment of imagination. No existing words
could ever describe and give justice as to how graceful and
stunning we were.

He held my hands – filling up the spaces that once stood
alone (but now never again). He touched the small of
my back and danced with me in the moon lit veranda with
only candles to witness us both.

His neck radiated of fresh soap and mint. His breath of
chocolate-covered strawberries we have shared fifteen minutes
ago. His soft, delicate hands tracing the non-existent contour
of my waist.

We swayed along Muse and Switch foot. As the last seconds
of our last song neared, he took me in his arms, and
put my lips against his. No one to see, no one to judge, no one
to ever write of.

Time flew so fast, yet so slow. Seconds turned into minutes,
minutes turned into hours, hours turned into centuries, and
after all my infinite nanoseconds, we were back under my covers
giggling like 5 year-olds, as love-stricken back in 2002.

And seeing his eyelids flutter now, I wonder if you are
ever going to leave again. Leave me back in my slumber, with no
deep brown eyes to wake up to. And without you, no one’s going to
*empty my aftershave or tie up my necktie anymore.
Keilah Jun 2014
I fished a box from the bottom of my closet
The box I have used and reused
(For quite some time)
(For the same enough reasons)
For I have nothing more left

I placed three of your shirts
(Same scent since you last wore it)
(Same scent since I last used it)
Two of which I have altered for my figure
One which reminds me of your sweat, your body, your fervor

As much as it pains me,
I need to give up the ones that lingered the most too.
A book for every special occasion
A novel for every month, for every day
I wanted to keep the memories (but not you)

I stacked Percy Jackson, Amy and Roger.
I piled Riggs, Clare and Seth Baumgartner.
I sealed the words that once got me through
(The days without you)
I’m giving them all back, so you’d know how it feels too.

I peeled our smiles, the kisses and hugs, the happy days
(Which we used to have)
I removed our photos from my collage
I deleted you from my camera
And I’m returning (our love) the products of your films to you.

I kept one. One photograph to remind me
Of how much I have loved and lost.
I kept one. To forever have this memory
Of how much love we had.
I kept one. (To remind me never to come back)

I untangled the bracelet, the necklace and the ring.
I have spent my minutes treasuring them.
But my time spent is enough.
Now, this will be yours to have.
To remind you (too) to never come back.

— The End —