I have all this love
And nowhere to put it
It's rotting inside me
Soft,warm
Unspent.

I reach out in dreams
But wake up alone
His name buried in my throat
Like a secret
I was not allowed to say.

He didn't stay
But the love did
And now it grows wild
Inside a heart
With no one left
To give it to.

Why do I think that I
Deserve more than the other guy
Acting like it's owed to me
Bought and paid for, mine to keep

Why do I treat selfishness
As if it is mine to possess
It's not enough I want it all
And when it's gone, I ask for more

Why do I hold onto pride
Ever tight for dear life
Afraid to let the people see
When it comes to the real me

Why do I light my angry side
Any disagreement, I try and fight
Pushing back with all my might
Thinking that, you're wrong I'm right

Why do I even think
I deserve anything
Angry at my selfishness
Which in turn hurts my pride no less

And the sun is sunny
side up

with a yoke begging
to be broke

and lapped up with a nice greasy
piece of toast

no rain today because
I said so

what we project is all we will ever be
to those

who  will never take the time
to  really know us

rearrange.

fail flee feel

that! feels more write.

we fail at 90% of out endeavors;

we flee to the recesses
and the excesses;

we feel, most keenly,
our sense of loss,
and yet the inner linings of our
cells, once more greet a Sun-day that marks a mild fresh-ness and our involuntary ****** muscles bend
intro to a small smile,
and once more,

we breach the day with right hooks of positivity, warmth, music, and begin  to
remember  to
    feel feelings, assorted,
and we minutely reborn and the fluids of birthing are wiped away

and coffee seals the deal...and a hopeful day begins and forgiveness
and forgetting is the clean start clothes we dress ourselves within,
and with out, comfy jeans, well worn raggedy t shirt that you refuse to obey, expressly forbid her

to descard,
(not a rypo).
and you annoy her
with twenty kisses,
cause you don't want to spoil her,,,
too much