stargirl: Favorites

Mar 2015 stargirl

stéphane noir

to my darling who feels she's not:
our separation is mere illusion.
truly, your pain strikes me as i write this;
your sensations of abandonment,
and the decisiveness they have caused,
bleed from my skin into the fibers of my clothes.
i am no longer clean.
i do not feel pure.

to my severed arm and shortened tendons:
destruction is merely another side of life.
out of disappearance comes all things-
without space, there would be nothing to contain us,
nothing to allow and enfold our beings' spirits,
and they would sputter and cease like my love's flame.
i am no longer yours.
i do not feel full.

to the farthest star that my eyes can see:
your light reaches me- i glimpse you!
in the perceived emptiness between us
there is no distance to be found;
around us exists the infinite potential for
further connection and deeper growth in closeness.
i am no longer alone.
i do not feel sorrow.

Mar 2015 stargirl

My Demons

Mar 2015 stargirl

Imperfect Desire

My Demons

Am I the only one that has their demons feasting upon their souls?
They say it is easy to tie a noose around your mind,
To overcome the urges and temptations of ending your life with a suicide
They don't know the true pain and torment that is going on in my head
An epic battle that leaves me with restless nights in bed
"End your life already" they say, as they prey on me during my weakest hours
Sometimes I give into the voices, carrying the sharp blade to my wrist
Crying as I struggle to mutter three powerful words that keeps me going
Choking on my sobs, my lungs deflate with a desire to say that God loves me
I try to convince myself that God is trying to test my faith
And to just wait, wait and wait
Then my Demons will eventually go AWAY.....

~Imperfect Desire **

#suicide #depression #pain #sadness #depressed #battle #demons #torment #emotional #emotionalpain

Mar 2015 stargirl

the liberation affair

Mar 2015 stargirl

heather leather

the liberation affair

they knew what was about to happen--
both of them already knew that this wasn't going
to end well, and maybe in the beginning they had
hope that their love wouldn't dwindle out but
in the end it wasn't enough, they both loved two
different people and it was now time to let each other go
and move on with whatever life would throw at them
they didn't even love each other
so why was this so hard?
why was ever single kiss, every single poem,
every single moment flashing in both of their heads
as if they actually cared about one another?
the silence was overwhelming, and if there was ever a moment
where they wanted to be swallowed whole it was this one
he took a deep breath, and with a shaking voice said the
words that they both knew were true
I think we should break up
and they should, they should because they didn't love each other
anymore and every moment they had with each other just
reopened whatever wound they had on each others' hearts
so, yes, it was time for them to leave each other
*but then why was this so hard?

god this story is sincerely ******* me up

Mar 2015 stargirl

moving on: part 3

Mar 2015 stargirl

ASB

moving on: part 3

scheduled a meeting with you
in spite of myself.

wrote down a couple of guidelines.

    "be polite. be friendly.
    avoid her eyes, and her hair as well,
    do not look at her legs, do not look
    for flirty subtext in her casual
    conversation. ask the right questions.
    don't stammer. remember you are not 13.
    don't look at her and smile and say
    'I love you'
    when all you should be saying is
    'goodbye.'"

tried not to worry; after all, it's just
a crush.

after all, I am not really
in love with you
that
much.

Mar 2015 stargirl

Empty kisses

Mar 2015 stargirl

OliviaAutumn

Empty kisses

She was the kind of girl you want to wake up next to
With the marmalade lips you always longed to find.
Instead you would fill the silhouette of her body,
Engraved on the empty space she left behind
With the words to be continued
Left in ink and unsigned.

#love #heart #passion #lust #lost #break #*** #emotions #ache

Mar 2015 stargirl

Discarded

Mar 2015 stargirl

Aviendha Goodrich

Discarded

I can't keep writing about the same things
Like a broken record played over and over again
Just so the lonely can hear something sing
It's all her emerald eyes and silent goodbyes
And all the times I've lost my mind
A memory lasts a lifetime,
As long as you have the evidence that that time
Truly existed
Maybe we missed it,
The last train to our future together
Maybe the timetables were wrong and
We were too busy watching our scars heal to
Make it to the station on time.
I've torn apart so many books and
Burnt so much fabric
In the hopes of forgetting people who
Discarded me entirely
And I will never see that word the same again,
Because when you've become inconvenient,
You will be dispensed, replaced,
Discarded.