Place your gentle hands on my skin, take me away to a fairytale
because I cannot bare reality.
I know when we are twisted under sheets, it's her who you see.
My body burns to feel you close
and be your only one.
Mask up my thoughts, I know she's there,
but when you sleep with me, it doesn't even matter.
One day you'll see, what I really mean, as you caress my flustered cheeks.
I don't really know what else to say, just constantly waiting, for the day, you walk
away

Lips like origami,
eyes like ice.
Hands like soap,
heart like darkness.
It’s dark versus light,
temptation versus innocence.  
I shouldn’t—I know—
but I can’t shake you off.
It’s fights at a wedding,
death on a birthday;
swearing in church,
hurting someone you love;
a book without an end,
your favourite song sung out of tune;
leaving without goodbyes,
spilling someone’s dark secrets;
sleepless nights,
a child without a home;
drinking until you puke,
lying to someone you love;
it’s wrong in every sense
of the word.
But once again,
it’s hands against
heart,
and we all know who will win.
We’re the epitome of dangerous,
crossing on territory that should not be touched.
But I can’t stop.

She entered her son's bedroom and found him playing hide and seek.
"Shhhh mommy. Don't make a noise, he'll figure out where I am hiding."
His mother smiled and ruffled his hair, "Okay sweetie, just come downstairs for dinner when you're done playing."

"Honey, what's our son up to?", her husband asked her while reading the newspaper.
"The same like always, playing with his imaginary friends.", she laughed.

Inside the cupboard, their hiding place, they whispered slowly.
"Don't tell mommy that we play together, she'll think you're crazy."
"But you're my brother, I am sure they'll be very happy."
"No. You don't get it, for them I'll always be the dead baby."

I'm not mad at you,
I promise.
Don't get me wrong,
I tried so hard to be.
I wanted to be mad at you,
for how everything has played out in the last few months,
but I just can't bring myself to do it.
I love you,
and that just doesn't work.
I miss everything about what used to be,
even the sort of "is this a thing" element,
the mystery became its own little twist.
Each moment treasured,
praying for time to slow down,
come to a screeching halt,
stand perfectly still.
Where everything else
faded out and I finally could
live in the moment.
But I was afraid,
so I did all in my power to push you away,
only to realize too late how much it meant,
finally admitting and coming clean,
only for none of that to matter anymore.
And over the last six weeks,
we've become strangers.
I'll admit I'm not a big fan of that,
but in my heart I genuinely feel that its best,
because the last time we talked and hung out,
only resulted with me going to far,
in pursuit of that previous happiness in a vulnerable time.
Do you remember the last thing you said to me,
after that incident?
That I made you feel uncomfortable.
I refuse to do that again,
because of how I feel about you.
I creaked the door back open,
half-heartedly saying that if you needed anything or wanted to talk,
I could do that.
Only to experience radio silence and glances across the cafeteria.
So maybe,
somewhere inside
you think that this is best,
and I wouldn't blame you for that.
Don't you think you did anything wrong,
because that's simply untrue.
This is just the only way I can protect you
from the monster I've become.