****, I did not get good sleep last night
Actually, I hardly even slept
Days have been stressful
Seconds have become burdens
Tasks I once anticipated with glee
Dissipated into mundane labor
I'm not going out as much
Life has become a bit more difficult

5 years ago I did not foresee
That this is where my road led me
I spent a lot of sleepness nights
Dreading my past failures
My missed opportunities
How did it come to this?
Why has my demorilization superceded
The calmed demeanor and self esteem
I had once possessed

I feel like I've been living life without
Consequence and lack the responsibility
To turn things on the wayside
Furthering my progression to return
To that road of calmed demeanor,
Rational thinking and love
The love I once had for myself

I need some fresh air

Cries pleading out in the dark,
New fears beginning to embark.
Goosebumps rising, sweat dripping,
Anxiety inside, fastly crippling.

Trying so hard to conceal,
All these fears I have to feel.
Faking all those laughs and smiles,
My thoughts so far, miles and miles.

Staring blankly, zoning out,
Positiveness I've started to doubt.
Missed the count of sleepness nights,
Feeling so alone when the pain bites.

Hearing whispers through out the night,
Looking around, no one in sight.
Shivers sent down my spine,
Having the feeling that I'll never be fine.