The pressure’s building up
I feel like soda that’s been dropped.
I feel like I’m about to explode
And I know that soon I’ll pop.

I know what’s about to happen
And I need to escape this room.
Where I go, I don’t know.
But I need to flee the impending doom.

I need to get to the clinic.
There I know I’ll be fine.
They always knows what to do;
But can I make it in time?

But no, it’s too late.
My soda bottle has blown.
I am no longer able to move, for
The seed of anxiety has grown.

Now I’ve collapsed, and
My rational side has died.
I can’t handle this-make it stop!
My strength is again being tried.

All the techniques I’ve memorized
Have completely flown my mind.
All the things I have prepared
Are suddenly unable to find.

“Don’t forget to just breathe!”
Ah, yes, the mantra of those “helpful” ones.
Well, here’s a newsflash for you-
Being told that helps NONE!

My lungs are overworking now,
And my heart is beating fast.
And every single breath I take
I fear it might be my last.

My hands have spiders in them.
My brain has gone offline.
My vision’s getting foggy;
Please- just don’t pass out this time.

My mind is leaving my body
And it’s floating freely in air.
I’m no longer able to feel anything
Please help me; I’m so scared.

Now I’m descending back to my body
And I can feel every atom around me.
It’s too much-make it stop!
Why can’t anybody hear my plea?

Luckily I calm down
Before my monster gets his way.
He’s returning back to hiding now
But I know he’ll soon come back to play.

The world went dark at midnight.

Fires gave one last valiant roar and died away.

Candles sputtered and drowned in their pools of wax.

Lanterns flickered and fell into an eternal sleep.

And the moon itself turned black
and came crashing down;
as the stars drifted away
abandoning us here.

The end of the world was at midnight.

Misconceptions. Betrayal. Ruthless decisions. Again. Striking us as the black crow in the flock of pigeons. She's playing with the demons for an interest but when she's no longer amused they loosely stick around. She's gone to far. They must drag her in further. Overtaking her. Oh her children turning to drug abuse running wild while hiding behind a mask. Reaching her soul they can taste her regret. Self harm. And mental disruption. They're inside her head leading her in vain. Envying her little happiness. Pumping her blood with venom. Dark and misleading. Should she have not played with one to many, maybe our lives would be back to normal.

You told me you loved me. I replied "what is love?" You told me you'd show me. I let you go on.

You hold me as if I'm fragile, yet you're aware that I can bare more than I appear.
You kiss me and I slowly wane to you.
You whisper in my ear the sweetest of words and I fall a little harder.
You look at me as though you can see within me, past my physical intentions.
You touch my lips, my heart stops.
You caress my face as you kiss my forehead,
I attempt to catch my breath.
Our fingers intertwine as you kiss every knuckle,
I melt within.
You sing to me the dearest of lyrics to help me sleep.
You call me just to say you love me.
You worry if I've eaten or if I've made it home. You worry if I'm upset or weary.
You ask of my past.
As if to catch up on what you've missed.
Even though you know we have the whole future to attend.


I told you I didn't know what love is. You replied " I'll show you".  

Love, when I can't go a day without you crossing my mind.
Love, when I'm in my happiest place yet I still feel as though you should be by my side.
Love, when I long for your presence, just so I can hold you.
Love, it's the honest truth.
Love, it's more poetic than any poem I write for you.

I do not
think that I
was meant
to break away

For now
My thoughts are scattered
and
shattered
like shards of
glass

I
do not know when
I will find
a light
or a hope
for me
in this darkness
that drowns
me

I do not
think that I
was meant
to break away

For now I
cannot sleep
I have
no
identity

I am
broken
and forgotten
crushed underfoot
by the
masses
like
shattered glass

Everyone here is smiling,
We've just saved the day.
We all cheer and pat each other on the back,
Why shouldn't We?
We've just saved the world again.

Inside I am screaming,
They have just killed my heart.
My shoulders are shaking and my eyes stream tears,
Why shouldn't they?
They've just destroyed my only hope again.

Our heroes descend with flying colors,
They've just saved the day.
We all shout with joy as they take a lap of victory,
Why shouldn't they?
They've just saved the world again.

I pick up the pieces now,
I have to try again somehow.
Though my heart shudders and my hands
My hands, they won't stop trembling,
And why shouldn't they?
They've just conquered the world again,
And all know me as the villain.

I will try to save the world again,
****** it from their illusions.
But what good is a single hero,
*When all know me as the villain.

when you ask me: how do you feel?
what i say is: I'm good, how are you?
when i really mean: I'm scared. of loosing the fight,
i  feel hopeless, i almost lost last night.

when you ask: do you want to eat?
what i say is: no I'm not hungry. i had a big lunch
when what i really mean is: yes. i haven't eaten in days.
please tell me to eat because i will if you tell me to.

when you say: you look sad, are you aright?
what i say is: yeah I'm fine. i just finished a sad book.
when what i mean is: no. I'm not. please help me because
i feel lost. and alone. I'm scared.

when you ask me: why don't you smile more?
i say: i don't know
but i really mean: i feel to alone to smile.
and i don't have the energy to.

when you ask me: what wrong?
all i say is: nothing
but inside I'm screaming: i feel like i can't breathe.
the sun is to bright it hurts my eyes. can you help me?

so listen to my words and if i ever say: I'm alright
know that I'm most definitely not alright.
its okay its not your fault you didn't hear
i hid my thoughts
but i live in fear.