if i were to write you, you'd be
misspelled words
sloppy handwriting
slashed out sentences
unformed thoughts
and simple ideas never fully pulled together

I always saw a fascination in the stars, the far away galaxies
Your eyes, the creases in your hands
The way these all formed together in a constellation
Exploding with stellar being
Everything about you was celestial.

Hours studying Zodiac signs left me empty
I needed to find myself in your solar system
Forcing life onto other planets
Deserted meteors I saw in your mind
I wanted to restore you.

As I looked to you I felt ablation
My mind melting away the ideas of horoscopes
Making room for you and your astro being
Never once wanting any sort of apastron
I awaited the chaos.

You are an evolved star
Burning out slowly, ever so
Sinking to be extragalactic
A place I never imagined
I was far from extraterrestrial.

But orbiting around you I felt the brightness of our galactic halo
Pushing deeper to reach your nucleus, I became your gravity
As one, our luminosity pressed tightly on all sides
Forcing darkness to disband, a large nova exploding from us
And now we are an elliptical galaxy.

It hurts
Because,
Calling you "my love"
Doesn't seem
Strong enough
Anymore.

Bruises covered with foundation
Long sleeves to hide hand prints and finger grips
When people ask
She always tells the story
"Oh he was just playing, he's too sweet to mean it."

But I never thought that I
Would be the one telling myself this story
In hopes I can convince my mind the same