this is an ending

i'm dancing to my swan song
in a room of unlit candles

restless shadows dance despite the
absence of hollowed light

i am so alone yet not
abandoned

my spirit is still
but my body is crying

for my aching heart that is
tired of dying

the californian ******* will keep me up
but i can't keep up with this bluff

oh i am drunk on your spirit
spiritdrunk, spiritdrunk, spiritdrunk

I'm laying here staring into the void,
The stars are harsh spectators.
Vast, cold nothingness reaches into me.
Prickly fingers grip my heart.

I'm bitterly  grateful for the familiarity,
It's nice to remember the pain.
A noose on my neck, a vice  in my gut.
Love has come to collect.

I remember the crossroads, the deal we made.
The glorious shining love,
That glow shined in all of the dark places,
Then we saw the ***** corners.

We saw the murk, polluted wells, fecund fields.
The glorious shining love,
it was no longer pure, it couldn't support us.
It splintered and blew us to pieces.

I lay here alone again, and I feel the darkness,
Embracing the black void again.
I reach into myself for the warmth of the light.
I feel the salty wet memories on my face.

Even the pain is  a glorious price for love.