And when he does not love me anymore,
I will build him
one last altar,
and decide to burn it to the ground.
But will only get as far
as lighting the match.
Thinking about how he used matches
for something.
Sometime.
Probably.
I'll brush my teeth,
thinking of the gaps between his.
How really,
it's a great metaphor for the distance between out hearts
or something stupid like that.
But in the end,
it's not a metaphor,
or an analogy.
They're just teeth.
(That could never quite come together
kind of like us)
I will crawl into bed
imagining an alternate universe
in which we have started a life together.
One where I wake up and reach across the bed for him.
Get the kids ready for school,
which is funny
because in this universe I never wanted children,
but in that universe,
we created something out of nothing.
Something with his eyes,
and my nose.
A manifestation of the love between two people.
Proof that it happened.
That is was real.
And it was resilient enough to breathe life into a world
that only offered it death.
In that universe,
our hair turns as silver
as our wedding rings.
And each wrinkle,
is a space where our skin just wanted
to hold the other person even closer.
But here
in this harsh reality,
time only pulls us apart.
And we will likely grow gray
with other people now.
In this universe,
I learn to say goodbye
to him.
I will build him
a library of poems.
And decide to burn it to the ground.
A poem on letting go.