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hitherto i naively challenged
my decision to enter an ominous existence
a vicious maze veiled in obscurity
inconceivable to navigate without the accumulation
of bruises, heartache, and psychic mutilation

the torment’s ache so unfathomable
i begged to evaporate beseeching death’s arrival
and with the dexterity of a masterful wizard
i magically spun threads of my shredded soul
into a mangled ball of mental lacerations

then stealthily in the opaque of the night
i rushed the frigid black ocean’s high tide
and deluging myself in the ebony water
i buried the battered ball
now deeply eclipsed in the onyx abyss

it sapped all my strength to hold it under
drowning in the wave’s of sea motion
stinging salt alive on my pours
gasping for air i surrendered my grip
releasing my marred orb of élan vital

capitulating to the sand on the beach
i ceded the fight and watched the sphere roll
unraveling it glistened against the white sand
an opalescent tapestry lit by twilight
mirroring the stars against the coal sky

in the lustrous lunar midnight
reflected back by silver moonlight
littered with specks of fluorescent insight
astonished i drew in my breath as i read
words interlaced in the untangled web

the wounds are there
creating a looking glass
peer in
and you will heal
your own consciousness

©2016janetaylor
What’s inside of you
Is inside of me
I know where you come from
Why you bleed

How you still laugh
How hard you cry
Why your still here
Why you still try

Don’t give it up
Don’t give it out
Just stop and listen to me now

What’s inside of you
Is inside of me
I know what your feeling
How it’s hard to breathe

What your doing
Who you are
Where your going
And how far

Don’t give up love
Don’t give up faith
Know your purpose and your place

What’s inside of you
Is inside of me
There is hope
And that’s all we need
Turn

YOUR gaze
From
The computer age,
From
The Screen of Artificiality...
Synthetic offerings
From
A False world.

LOOK!
Look the Other Way!
Look
What NATURE has
On display...
The Sky, Hills, Mountains
Rivers
Loving you is a paradox
It is an oxymoron
Made in hell
Can't you see that I'm torn?
My head spins
I lose my senses
My body feels numb
I am indifferent to life
All that matters is you
I can't stay with you
Why do I cope with this so lightheaded;
I feel like I hate you
No one makes me feel worse
But no one makes me feel better
And more alive
eking out the ultimate gasp in my last breath of impulsion
i collapse without a touch of grace at race's end
how i made it i will never know
dazed and in bewilderment
i reminisce upon my journey

an aggregation of barricades assailed me
with iniquitous decadent delight
seeming to writhe in triumph at my possible demise
capitulating as it devoured and spewed me out the other side
i humbly reassembled fragments of my near annihilation

temporarily rehabilitated
i recommenced the toilsome climb
to the treasured peak atop the mount
when in would come the tempest with its furor
and render me asunder

mere exhaustion is not the word
for death experienced recurrently
ground to mulch and back again
screaming, pleading, surrendering
proved futile as i newly met the same demise

near incapacitation i miraculously emerged
and scraping pulled myself with broken heart and bones
scratching my way through the darkness
toppling at the pinnacle
to victory's end

with exhilaration it dawns on me
the long dark night is over
i passed the test to realize
it is not the finish line
but only the beginning

©2016janetaylor
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