These shattered pieces of my life,
Failure, repetition, constant strife,
More dark than light, more cons than pro's,
The times I've tried, heaven knows!
Rarely happy, more often sad,
The brightest spark, those calling me dad,
When things seem on track, I'm soon derailed,
And yes I've tried, then failed and failed.
My social circle is very small,
Look very closely, it's only Paul,
I let people in, then I get burned,
Build barriers high, the lesson learned.
I don't need anyone to make me complete,
But a shoulder to lean on, that would be sweet,
Someone to hold, it's been a while,
Someone to care for behind the smile.
Struggles, stresses, over thinking,
Feeling like I'm always sinking,
An outlet for friends, that's never in doubt,
But can anyone hear me when I shout?
A humour so dark, I make others cringe,
But if I let it all out, their soul I'd tinge,
A cry for help you'll never hear,
I just need to know there's somebody here!
To live with loathing, to live with doubt,
Has become what life is all about,
The person you know, warm, sincere,
Has become a mask, my thin veneer.
Branded flirty, often shameless,
Tho deep inside, I know I'm worthless,
And so I share me in this verse,
To help other sufferers lift their curse.
Cinco Espiritus Creation - 2019