You can't give love
only to take it back
but I swallow words
like pills these days

and the side affects
have no warning label
and overdosing is
too often fatal

I look back at the past
When we were in love
I really thought we'd last
I thought we'd make it past
Past all the bumps in the road
Past all the **** people spoke
our way.

Anyway,
If anyone should've asked
I would've responded right away
"He is the one. Forever he will stay"

I glance at the pillow beside me
Awakened for a new day
That pillow which lingers of your smell
Where your head would gently lay
As you wrapped your arms around me
Washing all of life's troubles away

But I knew our love was lethal
We were deadly.
We were toxic
Our love was out of this world
We were magic.
We were cosmic
We drained each other for all we had
We were selfish.
We were ironic
To love someone and leave them with nothing.
That which is tragic.

They say time heals all wounds
I could've spent a lifetime
Mourning over you
And for a while I was numb
My heart felt nothing
I was nothing.

But I've finally learned to feel again
To glance at the sky and smile
But I'd do it all over again
If it means having you around for a while.

It doesnt matter
If i see it

It doesnt matter
If she sees it

It doesnt matter
If he sees it

It doesnt matter
If anyone in the world sees it

Because until YOU dont see it for yourself

You will never know
You will never understand
The pain you put me through everyday

Whats worse than being hurt
Is that I'm being hurt

By you

There's a funny thing about sadness
The way it surrounds you so you feel whole
Nothing else is let in
Except the sorrow and the pain
You can see the happiness
But never feel it
Want it
But not have it
There's a funny thing about sadness
How you become so familiar with it you can't feel anything else.

I hear the songs being sung in church
About mercy, grace, and love.
Something deep inside my heart
Tells me I'm not enough

As I look around at all the people
Hands high singing amazing grace
With eyes closed and hearts wide open
I want to be in their place...

God make something click inside of me,
My heart is a lock and you have the key,
Open me up to wonders new,
Set me free to live for you

At bible study my lips are pursed
Hiding the secrets inside,
My guilt is locked up in my heart
To save my image and pride

Oh I wish I could feel what it's like
To be so happy and pure.
The girls around me shine like stars,
Something is missing for sure.

So God make something click in side of me,
I'm praying to you, begging on my knees,
Unleash the demons inside my soul
Release me from every idol's control

For far too long I've been living my life,
Just living for myself,
But I come to you so broken inside,
Oh Lord, I need your help...

I need something in me to click,
I need a love that will forever stick,
I need your key to unlock the real me,
I need to feel what it's like to be totally free.

So when I'm in church I'm in the know
Of the very thing that makes people glow
Because my light will shine so bright,
And give hope to people lost in the night.

I will face my peers with eyes open wide,
My need for grace will swallow my pride
I will open my heart for all to love
My strength and love from God above.

Hello 911,

It still hurts.