You know, I've written about love
Or the lack thereof in my life quite a lot
And I've been holding this in so long its ******* my intestines in knots
So I'm going to say this know before i blow up my spot.

******* Valentine's day, go and rot.

I hate feeling pressured to buy, buy, buy!
"If you love her you'll go into debt up to your eyes!
 If i loved her id show it, not rely on breaking my credit into pieces you greedy ****** its
A **** frustrating thing to deal with in a relationship. But being single might be just that little bit worse

Like being paddled for a college initiation, there's very few things worse.
Well, maybe joining my love life in the back of a hearse
Geez, that hurts.
But seeing all the lovely couples around town
Drinking coffee, being cute, just drives that nail further into the ground.
Reminding me that I'm about as desirable as a ****** without buck teeth, or Brad Garret refusing to frown.

******* Valentine's day, I'm sick of you bringing me down

Know what the worst thing is
Its not wanting to be a burden
But still finding yourself feeling weak
And powerless, i doubt its just me
That feels this way, you don't want to be worrying anyone you care about even though you know that worry comes from a place of love
You want no one to have to worry, even if you don't know itll be alright
Despite this, i write this to tell you that you can't live your life chasing spirits and piecing together long broken wounds, but you also can't assume that doom and gloom will follow your life from front to back and side to side

So never. Ever. Give up. Till the last stand we broken souls will fight

I'm pretty sure people have told you
You're beautiful, bur have they showed you
Their need for you, in those sweatpants at 3 am at the store
Or when you don't have makeup on not feeling your best
Have they still seen that same beauty, as if you were at the oscars dressed to impress?
Has anyone kissed you so deeply, it melts your soul?
Has anyone held you tight, and you prayed you didnt have to let go?

They have? Well you're one fortunate soul...

I'm not a moral compass
I can't say what's right
But
I can say that what i want to do
tonight
Is definitely wrong
And i want it to last
As long as i can
I want you to be satisfied
With red marks on your back and ***
And pleasure induced tears in your eyes
Despite
My inexperience i aim to please
I hope i can fulfill your needs...
And i can't accomplish that I'll at least have done the Deed

-Neroamee Alucard

Pride, it's a troubling thing to deal with
Hell, it's enough to spilt
A family. Which is what you did,  you damaged us irreparably, i barely saw you through the last of my formative years. I was unprepared facing those ever hateful teenage fears
Had you been around you might've saved me from running myself into the ground
But I'm all grown up now, and you missed out on so much
You have nieces and nephews that haven't seen your face or even know you exist, but despite all of this i still love you and i hope one day your pride will fall.
And we can finally be a family, once and for all

I wonder what its like to look at a mirror, stare at your reflection and not want to reject it
Eject it into a vat of ether so it burns slow like tuna casserole
I know i shouldn't be writing about these things but its been haunting me since i was 16
Still young and somewhat pristine but no one went my way like cards on a riverboat, I've hid that feeling for a long time with an overcoat
Made of self deprecation and little derivation from that formula of running from things i cant see, but you cant avoid your own feelings
When they hammer into you like nails on a wall,
Its a winder I'm still standing up posted like a ghostbuster in city hall...

I wouldve been gone years ago, bur music saved me y'all.

I began to wonder something
Why is it we demonize when we disagree
Politically?
And then it hit me, most of the time
Its because you haven't seen the world from behind someone else's eyes.

Have you ever been bullied, beaten, or otherwise threatened, simply because of your last name having a Spanish accent or because your skin has the chemical melanin?

Have you ever been close to execution because of your faith?
Or are you too busy making sure that yours is the one in majority that remains,
Have you ever been thrown out because of who you love

Or because these things have never happened to you.. you don't have the sense of empathy to understand that experience like people aren't uniformly made, because thats what makes humanity great

Though our outsides and lives are different, inside we're the same.