Walking with your rod in hand
Across this rocky ridged path
To get you your favorite fishing spot
Where you stay until it begins to get dark

When you try to stand up
You realize if to slippery to walk
But you need to cross it to get to your car
So you have no choice but to move on

Wishing you didn't come to this spot
The darker it gets the harder it is to walk
Then you come to this odd looking rock
You think you can cross it with out getting hurt

But when you do you slip and you **** lands on it's curve
You try to get up but cry in pain
You yell for your son to come help you as fast as he can
He runs over to you and grabs your hand

As he pulls you up with all his might
You've never let pain like this in all your life
You try your best to walk off these rocks
But in your head you want to push your self off

To drift in the sea and let the water take you away
But he keeps hold of your hand and forces you on you way
It takes 10 long minutes to get to the car
When you get in to the drivers seat you balling your eyes out

Since the fall it's gotten worse you back has now gone
You can barely walk a block with out your feet going numb
You now have a can to balance your self out
Your disliked are now all pushed out

You've tried every kind of treatment with out any success
And you have no idea what your going to do next
What you need is to get your back fixed up
Or soon you won't be able to walk at all

I came to terms with the fact that
You're never coming back.
So when I sit in my car alone
And smell you
I can't bear the unknown.

I did everything I could
And told myself
Beyond everything
That you understood.

So that night I never heard from you
And that night you didn't
Look at me
I did everything in my power
To tell myself that there was never
An us of ours.

I can't listen to certain songs anymore
And that feeling of being unwanted
Is like never before,
And sleep used to be my escape
But now the darkness I see
Is like the darkness I saw in your room
So no matter where I go
Or what I do
I'm always followed by
The thought of you.

I breathe you,
I remember you,
I smell you,
Its beyond me why I still sweat you.

But I did everything..
I did everything.
I did everything I could,
And beyond it all,
I always told myself you understood.

a notecard in a book,
bearing two words that bring to the fore
countless desires and longings,
secrets i tell no one,
not even in my prayers.

a simple phrase that reminds me
of a truth i learned long ago
and rarely allow myself to indulge -
i am allowed to dream.

possible wishes,
probable dreams,
attainable hopes,
life lived.

I can't see you though
I know your near I've felt your breath a thousand times
I've relived our life within my mind
can't go back for too much fear
I'm better off without you here
I'm stonger now than the force of a hurricane
and stronger than your guilt or blame
I'm  a fire that can't be tamed....
I will remain.